Monkey Mama*s Monkey Money Blog

No more HBO!!!! Hallelujah!! LOL.

I don not know how many times I have broached the subject that we don't need HBO, heck cable since we are not saving much money, etc. Dh has always staunchly been opposed.

This morning I woke up and he had been up all night slashing the budget. I Was really scared to look but the only thing we really fought about was the christmas budget. & after arguing it out there is only 1 thing we disagree on.

I almost fell over when he told me he is cancelling HBO.

Honestly, I know we have communication issues. We try to write down stuff because we always have the "you neevr told me" fight about our plans every week, and so in the end I Said if it is not on the calendar you didn't tell me. Since we wrote it all down, no more fighting. Seems the same with the way of the budget.

I was pleased he did not cross out the gardener either. If he crosses it out he can do the work - I just refuse at this point. Just glad something I thought we would fight over. I can give up anything but that. & of course he hasn't goven up cable but from $60 to $40 whatever - it's a step. He was pretty on par with what I came up with but besides the HBO we lowered eating out to $30 - mostly for my social life, and miscellaneous from $250 to $170.

Overall I know I am relinquishing some control, which is hard for my control freak side, but it feels so good to truly have him on board and understand where I have been coming from so long. This is why I nitpick when he buys things, I am not sure why me telling himw e didn't have the money got through his head and this does, but oh well.

HE applied at Best Buy and Target - just for the rest of the year. We might actually save a lot this year. Yay!

Digging deeper and getting some time to talk, well he is all freaked out because he thinks we have been saving money all these last few years. I have NO IDEA where he got that impression - you are right - he is on another planet - LOL. Um the fact that are savings has dwindled down to 5k is a BIG hint we are not saving money darling. & he is well aware where our finances stand. Men!! Anyway, I made clear since he has not been working we have saved just about zilch. We haven't really gone in the red with the exception of a car we just purchased - which basically brought our savings to 0. But we certainly haven't saved a dime. Get real.

Today even with the quibbles I see in the future about little purchases, and the fact my husband is acting like a parent to me somewhat today, I Feel like a huge load has been lifted from my shoulders. Aaaaaahhhhh...

Edited: Oh yeah - I knew it was TOO good to be true - LOL. HE mentioned as I walked out the door this morning that he checked the listings and none of his shows are on until March - *rolleyes* I guess we will fight over it in march. At that point if he wants HBO I say it will come out of his allowance. Oh well, at least 6 months of no HBO - $120 saved. I am pleased that we will not pay for it while we are not using it at least - well duh.

Yeah, well was having a discussion with my hubby and we were arguing over groceries. *sigh*

HE does all the shopping, and I think really since I am a control freak, he does not want to relinquish control over the groceries - so he is fighting over it tooth and nail. Well, that is my psychological insight anyway. I don't want to take control I just want to save some money - aaaaarrrrggggghhhh...

Actually it all started when I was looking up some of those books on the book thread as I was putting some on my christmas wishlist. I was kind of bored with the selection and telling dh if you read one frugal book you've read them all. I was raised frugally and have garnered little from these types of books in the past. I guess I am interested in more investment books at this point. Though I then proceed to tell dh that one area I think we can improve on is our grocery shopping. When I look at our budget we pay little for may things, we have our luxuries, and then groceries pop out of me - that we should be able to trim them down. Then dh tells me I am insane and there is NO way we can save any more money. I think he is insane! So my reply is, what, if I lost my job we could not survive on $200 a month? Of course we could. Then he says he doesn't want to eat Top Ramn every night. Well the people I know saving money don't eat Top Ramen every night - gah. I don't know why he is so resistent to even giving a try!

Oh yeah, and then he says I used to get mad when he stocked up on stuff for sale. I have no idea what he was talking about until he mentions I did not want him to buy a leapster game on sale - OMG! I am talking "necessities" here - I remember that argument because we did not have the money for it and he was determined to buy it regardless. He said he was going to buy it anyway and I wouldn't let him buy it on sale. Pffffttt. The whole point was I didn't want him to buy it at all. Gah. I assured him I would not complain if he stockes up on grocery items while they are on sale - gheesh. I am not talking about toys and games here which we do not need!!!

Well, we spend around $500/month. I just lump all the grocery bills under grocery category, but this month I am sorting everything in quicken by food items. I have the categories dairy, fruits/veggies, meat, soda, cat, diapers, non-food, etc. So over a couple of months I would like to see how much we are actually spending of FOOD. & trying to look for sales on non-food items elsewhere, etc. We have been clipping a lot of coupons. We have noticed since we buy generic most of the time, generic is usually cheaper than the coupons help in the end anyway - tend to be for name brands. But of course I am encouraging dh to stock up when generic stuff is on sale, etc. & there are always a few great coupons regardless...

I have also been clipping coupon for walgreens and rite-aid - they have really good deals on some items - which I could pick up on my way home from work, etc. I don't necessarily want to spend all of our time driving to different stores - there is a cost/benefit here as well. But a stop on the way home I can deal with. But it will be interesting to see how all the coupon clipping pans out this month. Also, we are trying to plan our meals around the sales more.

I was reading the grocery threads for more ideas and saw some intersting ones. There is a Big Lots by my work that I have never been in. I guess I should start perusing it for grocery deals. & other deals as well, eh?

I was telling my dh about double/triple coupons and did not really understand then - he said it was all BS. I realize now because looking at that thread, there are no stores in our area that do that. Oh well, that would have been easiest, eh?

The tip that strikes me as odd as that gas stations have sales prices on some items. Too weird. I will have to check it out. Who knew?

We always figure we would get a Costco membership eventually when the kids are older. I just don't think now is the time. But maybe we are missing out.

I know there are a few disocunt stores around so I am not sure why dh is so set on Raleys, Bel Airl, Safeway, etc. He is pretty familiar with those stores and knows which ones have the best deals on certian items, etc. HE plans his shopping around that. Maybe he just doesn't want out of his comfort zone. & we would have to drive far (10 miles? & gas sucks lately) to these other stores - there are none near us. Raleys has yes been more high end in the past but lately they have been cheapest by far - they are revamping their strategy to be a low cost leader. & we have a new Bel Air down the street which is empty most the time so we both love to go their to beat the crowds.

Besides that we don't buy much in the way of processed foods, try to limit meat, etc. So we kind of have had the basic tenets of saving grocery money down for a while. We do good home cooking almost every day.

Oh well, it will be interesting to see what we can do in the next few months. Anyone has any good tips in general or Northern CA though - let me know. I hear a lot about Trader Joes but that is another one that is a good 20 mintue drive to get to.

HEy I just noticed I had 1300 points so I bought myself a black user name - pretty sweet. Black is my favorite color. I Would have got a glowing name - well I don't think I had enough points - but I use firefox and not internet explorer. That sucks. LOL. I might buy it anyway in the future. I use explorer on occasion.

I am just vegging out waiting for the kids to wake up. Baby slept through the night again. I in turn was wide awake at 5am, but that is good. I feel like my life has been turned upside down the last few months. Usually I wake up early to work out and get stuff done, but that has been so out the window of late. It feels good to have some time.

Well yesterday I spent $30 at amazon. I invested in some mutual fund books. I figure it was a good investment and I Was too lazy to go used. I intended to look at the used options on amazon but they were only $1 or $2 cheaper than new so I figured what the heck.

I also started my christmas shopping. I had intended to start sooner, and I Was feeling silly yesterday that I Felt so behind though it is only Oct. 6 or so - LOL. I am kind of laughing at myself - still have lots of time. But during my lunch break yesterday I perused ebay and found some cute things for my mom. Spent about $20 on 2 gifts (most of it as shippping of course). I had budgeted to buy her one gift - $20 so I was pleased I squeezed out 2. HEr birthday and christmas shopping is DONE - woot.

I also donated $20 to a co-workers grandkids' school - in return for wrapping paper. A good cause and one less thing to buy otherwise - eh. I usually do pretty generous with that stuff so spent 1/2 as much as usual. well within my donation budget.

But overall a lot of money spent this last week.

Set up an appointment with the estate attorney who is a friend of the family. We'll see how that turns out. We don't have significant assets on one hand, but if both my dh and I bite the dust we have $1 mil insurance between the 2 & significant home equity house. I decided we really need to get things squared away. ALive not worth much, dead worth a lot. Don't tell the kids. ; ) Plus as a CPA I know you really need to get your affairs squared away - because when you don't it gets ugly - see it time and time again with clients. I should know better, the fact it has taken this long is inexcusable. Anyway, hopefully by the end of the year we will have our affairs in order.

The Merill lynch guy has not sold any of the funds we asked him to. I am back to square one and want all of our money out - I am so fed up with him - I have no idea what the deal is. It is dh's IRA so he has to take care of it - and he isn't actually in a hurry. Gah. Something else I would like to take care of NOW which there is no reason why I couldn't have transferred the funds by now. I just wanted him to sell so I knew how much cash was in there. I am tired of waiting, will probably start one of the transfers, I guess it doesn't matter if he hasn't sold it yet - I have an idea how much money is in there. LEt the new custodians ask for the money...

I hope to get some time this weekend to go over the budget with dh. PArt of the problem is I do all the money and then he kind of does his own thing, and we don't communicate great. HE doesn't buy much, but one month I will be thinking we need to crack down, and he'll go out and buy a DVD or something. Anyway, I have made a sample budget but he hasn't put any input in, so I am hoping he can look at it this weekend and we can revise it again to fit both our needs. Same with the christmas budget - I put it together but may be missing something he intends to buy, etc.

Communication is good - LOL.

I also had an epiphany. When I Was on maternity we lived on very little. It seemed we spent A LOT less on gas which really helped, and little incidental work expenses. But otherwise I Wasn't really sure why we did so good.

Anyway, our credit card bill averages $1800/month, my goal lately has been $1600, and without all of our vacation stuff and gymboree which I paid for with extra money, our cc bill would have been $1200 this month. Why? I then had the epiphany that when we felt broke we didn't spend money and well, that is why we got by so well on maternity leave - LOL. Seems simple but I didn't really get it before. The amazing thing is we didn't feel at the time we gave up that much. That is the beauty of budgeting I guess - if you do it right.

My husband laughed at the "it would be $1200 except for this and this and this" reasoning - but this is all stuff out of the budget now no problem. We are not going to disneyland or spending $300 on my birthday again anytime soon. Guaranteed...

I am starting to see why I should have $700/month for the temp savings funds - it is really there. Yay!

Also, I have always been a general budgeter but once we started throwing everything on cards to get cash back I have really struggled. Obviously where I went wrong was budgeting a total for the cc. IT used to work, but we only put very miscellaneous and extra things on it before. It was never going to work until we sat down and did a line by line budget by expenses on the credit card -and look I saved $600 easy peasy. IT's crazy. Well, we're getting there anyway...

Ah, I wish I had more time to puruse the boards, but I have too much work to do today - LOL. Darn work! ; )

I did ramble on about rents which I know no one cares - I live in crazy land. LOL. This is why no one randomly visiting my blog and viewing my stats can not appreciate that I own a very nice house in CA and only owe $215k on it. It took a lot of blood, sweat and tears. I am STILL reisisting the urge to pay it down faster and put more money in savings. It is hard. I know I need liquid cash more. The fact that we owned a home at 22 (with 20% down) is cause for applause. Sometimes we dream of moving to ORegon and putting a good $400k in the bank (well last year when our house was worth more anyway). Plopping $50k down on a similar house and semi-retiring while the kids are young. But for now we are suckers and stay. More for family than anything... Though when our equity was up to $500k for a while I Was ready to throw family out the window - we could fly down and visit every weekend with that money. ; ) But housing prices have dropped considerably. So yeah if you paid me $500k I would move from family, that is what we have learned in recent years - the price of family - LOL.

In our first home we had over $100k equity when we committed to this house - we were going to have a $100k mortgage here when we moved. But it dropped overnight. So live and learn. I know friends in other states who can not get past our equity, but I can't get too excited about it. Here today, gone tomorrow. Even if we decided to cash out today there is no guarantee we would be able to get what we think we could - anything can happen tomorrow. So I no longer get excited about equity. Frankly I am just happy we own a home. Extremely extremely grateful. I grew up thinking we could never afford to live in California at all.

Oh anyway, I meant to post and tell everyone who is getting a good night sleep to have a good night sleep on me. ; ) You know those of you wihtout small kids and multiple jobs and staying up studying, those of you without sleep disorders. But I must say I have gotten some REAL sleep this last week. I really hesitate to say it without knocking on wood. But things are well in sleepy land. The only thing worse than my son not sleeping well, due to teething, is the constant input from other people about all we are doing wrong regarding sleep. Okay, my son has horrible painful teething and that is hy his sleep has been disrupted. But over time with the lack of sleep you ebgin to question yourself and wonder if everyone else is right. & then finally your baby sleeps full nights and even begins to put himself back to sleep when he wakes up in the middle of the night. Hallelujah. I don't know why I let other people get to me. Phew.

Ahhhhh, sleep is such a luxury these days and I feel in the lap of luxury today. Feels good...

I will enjoy but try not to get used to it. More teeth are on the way...

Well I Was motivated and went shopping yesterday. I went to Ross and stocked up on $5 books (they were REALLY nice big books), a dominoe game, and some puzzles. I then went to Target because I wanted to get a lighty spinny thing (I have no idea what it is called) for each kid, but they only had 1 left. So I got 1 of those, 4 high bounce balls, and some stickers and halloween magnets (really nice) all on clearance. 1/2 came from the $1 bin which my friend had suggested. I think I made out far better at Target than Ross even. Well now I know. I spent about $48 for 4 kids. I was thinking of going to the dollar store for birthday cards, but dh who HATES cards said, "can they read???" I thought about it and decided no they don't really need cards. HE is right sometimes. Saved a few dollars. So $12 per kid, and I think I got some pretty cool stuff...

One of the kids we are really close to and I may go splurge on him a little more, but beyond that not bad. I am not sure if I will take it out of the gift budget or the misc. budget or what. I like to be flexible and if one month I want to spend more on something and take it from another envelope so to speak, oh well. Well that's why I have just a misc. category. We'll see. It is only the 5th, and the month is long.

Oh yeah Ross was bad because I bought some winter clothes for older son. Whenever I buy anything though I think, this costs $13, but it should last through both my sons. Hmmm. So it feels more like spending $6.50 on each. I had bought his winter wardrobe for $40 or so at the thrift shop last month but they didn't have much in the way of jackets. Too bad because I Scored good last year. SO at Ross I saw some nice jackets but spent more than I Would have otherwise I guess. $22 for a jacket, hooded sweatshirt (since the one I had bought thrift didn't fit over his head), and a winter hat for his growing head.

Anyway, the thrift shop I go to is great for kids clothes and that is about it. Mostly shirts and pants. What I really need to do is start checking out other thrift stores in the area. I don't know why but as much as I Shop ebay and thrift, it is always an afetrthought. I would never spend more than $50 or something unless I checked out my used options first. But there is so much under $50 that I don't think twice buying new. I am trying to get out of that mindset. Like reading someone's blog it just occured to me to do some Christmas shopping on ebay. Well duh, why didn't I think of that sooner. Or even in the thrift shops.

We also have a new store out here called "Stupid Prices" (stupidprices.com) that looks pretty good from its ads. Furniture, clothing, groceries, etc. I am going to check it out I guess.

So much of this stuff is over by my work I see more shopping in my future. Blah, I hate shopping. But if they have great grocery prices I can help out dh a bit I guess.

Anyway, I need a big note on my wallet or credit card that says "CHECK EBAY FIRST." Something like that to keep me budget minded on the small stuff.

I don't know why I have always been so frugal minded on big things but not little things. ?????? Something I am learning I guess...

I think in the past I often choose convenience over savings. I would shop shop shop internet all the time, because I hate taking the time to go shopping. I truly dislike it. I LOVE internet shopping in turn, and find that I don't get distracted like I do in the stores, by things not on my list and such. But oh well, that is what EBAY is for. Ebay often is nice, but shipping puts it in the realm of not that frugal a lot of the time... I think I will start doing a littl more in person shopping. More shopping to save money, eh? Sounds like an oxymoron. LOL. & I will put a note that says EBAY in my wallet. No more buying anything without checking Ebay first! In the meantime I need to become an area thrift shop expert...

Was lazy today:

$52.17 cash for 2006
- 1.08 BK Lunch
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$51.09 remains
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I tend to do a $1 lunch every week so I thought today was a good day because it was Wednesday.

My dumb plan for the week was hosting a get together at my house thursday. I did not intend to serve dinner, and chose this option to avoid a $10 - $15 dinner. Oh well. Now I am buying pizza instead due to pressure - LOL. & then all the birthday presents - my word. Oh well, I like my budget to be flexible - so I will probaly chalk this one to eating out & I do have a gift budget. I just did not foresee using it this month or next and was going to use it for christmas instead!!!!!! But oh well - who knew october was such a birthday month! For now I will lump it where I can, just means less gift buying an eating out this month.

Ahhhh, the daycare thread is still being beat to death but on my drive to BK I was pondering something I didn't even thing about. With my first son I drove home at lunch every single day to be with him, and then he napped every afternoon from 1-5. He's a sleeper. I had no idea how good I had it of course - LOL. Another reason why the mommy wars perplexed me. So I don't see my son from 8-12 but I see him before nap and when he wakes up, does he notice I am gone 8 hours a day? Not really!

& then this was the son who we felt at 1 may be ready for preschool or daycare if hubby wanted to get a job. OF course my second son threw us for a loop. I Was lucky CA had a new law at the time and I got 12 weeks paid home. Disability - not full pay - but enough to get by. & then after all that I had to work PT 3 months because he refused to drink from a bottle. & then I had PPD issues and I just could not work full speed again until he was about 6 months old.

I look at him today and I can not imagine putting him in any care - he is such a "baby" still at 15 months. HE is not even walking yet. My older son was just the difference of night and day. At 1 he was like a 2-year-old. At 3 he is like a 5-year-old. I am guessing my baby is on par for being a normal baby, but the whole thing is weird, my other son fast forwarded through this stage so fast. I had no idea there was this stage between "baby" and "full blown toddler."

& sleep? Ha! The baby does not sleep.

Anyway, I have always felt more guilty working with this baby because I no longer have the time to go home at lunch. I have a lot more responsibility, and gas prices have been crazy. & he doesn't sleep 1/2 the day away so I miss so many waking hours. Ah, but I get them all back in the middle of the night! ; )

Anyway, I just throw this out to those of you planning ahead for children down the road. Plans are nice but inevitably your children will put a wrench in your plans. LOL. Guaranteed. ; ) My husband and I keep saying when he turns 2 our daycare options will be much greater and cheaper, etc., etc. But frankly, will he be ready for that? At this rate, no. But we'll work it out I guess. That's why I am here and cracking down on my budget. We have been doing just fine, but saving and getting ahead, not so much. I am starting to envision we will do the 1-income thing longer than we planned, so trying to get to a point where it just doesn't matter. Where that 2nd income is pure gravy. BEfore it was going to be retirement, but now I am trying to squeeze that out of my own check. But I know we will make it work.

I was looking at the credit card and added up Disneyland - $390. I thought it would be about $350 - $400. Oh well.

The really bad thing is opend up my cc bill today online and it threw me for a loop. This $390 popped on and the total was around $2100 for the month. For some reason I was thinking it was going to be closer to $1800. I have NO idea why - LOL. I am not sure if I can afford to stay on top of the budget on this whole lack of sleep thing. Our baby has been teething and sleeping TERRIBLE and I in turn have been super braindead. Maybe I was hoping more would be delayed to next month. Maybe I was getting confused with the cash basis thing. I have no clue what I was thinking. I am saved because we sold Pepsi stock - $1300. Needed $1000 for insurance and figured $300 for an attorney - we are going ot get our wills/estate taken care of. I have no idea if $300 would even cover it, but it's a start. But anyway, that money will help us float by this next month when hopefully we can save money for insurance, etc. I think I am short $100 + plus means no money to emergency fund in October. Man, this stinks. LOL. Though it is very logical that spending an extra $400 made it a non-saving month. I just can't get past I have no idea what I Was thinking.

Oh well, October is long, anything can happen. I have been trying to find time to do some freelance work for a neighbor/client. Then again my weekends are booked - hehe. I better pencil her in FAST so I can put some money away this month.

Oh anyway, we are going to the pumpkin patch next week for my son's preschool and I was to pay $5 for each of us. Since I volunteered to drive 4 kids, they just told me they will pay for me. Yay! Even better since my son just switched to M & W all day, they said he could come Friday instead next week since they are closed Monday. I had thought to ask, but didn't. They are so nice. I don't know how many days when he was 1/2 time they let him stay all day for free because they knew I hesitated to put him in more than 1/2 days, because he just naps all afternoon. Why pay someone to watch him nap? But in a pinch they would keep him all day at no extra charge. & I am glad they are being so super nice on the holiday thing too. They essentially are holding open M/W/F until I can afford to put him back in more. Who else would do that????? Few and far between...

All I know is I save $5 unexpectedly. Yippee.

Well I just RSVPed for 3 birthday parties - yes 3 - and another on the way I know of. & 2 Halloween parties.

Oh my son will be in 7th heaven. He LOVES parties. As for dh and I, eh, we are pretty quiet, low key people. I have no idea where my son comes from and frankly his social life EXHAUSTS us. Of course he thrives from it. This is a big reason why he is in preschool - so we can catch a break.

I tend to be pretty nice with gifts. Usually $20/kid. I spend way more on other kids than I do my own. LOL. But even $10/each for 3 parties is not really in the budget this month. It is tight with Christmas coming up and all. But I got some good ideas from you all. Is 3 parties gonna break the bank? YEah maybe if I didn't get ideas here. ; )

As a working mom I really have trouble mainitaining playdates and such, and I feel bad because dh just doesn't really do them. In the past maybe, but again it really exhausts him. But a friend of mine just e-mailed me and said she was a football widow and up for some sunday playdates. I haven't seen her in ages and that would be great. & then my moms group is revamping and trying harder to do more weekend/evening stuff. Looking at my calendar it is nice, but too late I guess - LOL. My october is completely filled. I hope november slows down a bit!

I am going to be exhuasted and my son is going to have the best month ever I guess - hehe.

I do remember once Halloween hit last year it seemed like the year went in overdrive, and now I see why. January will be here in a blink!!

Here's a long one:

I think the Daycare post was getting beaten to death, but I wanted to share a little more about our situation, because it got me thinking. Obviously, I think people should do what is right for them - they have to live with their choices. & I Say obvious because my husband and I have taken on some pretty untraditional roles. The interesting thing about it though is when we made the decision for him to be a SAHD years ago I always imagined we would get a lot more flak. The only flak comes from his family who can't seem to get past that it works for us. In the mainstream I have mostly encountered admiriation more than anything. Well to our faces, who know what is said behind our backs. LOL. But I know too many women who stay home and never catch a break. & of course they are in awe how much my husband takes on. Not just that but how much we help each other. I can't entirely understand what he goes through, but I know it is not easy, and we do what we can to help each other out.

But yeah, how our situation evolved was that he REALLY wanted kids and I don't think I particularly cared either way. I never really wanted kids, but knew he did, and for him I Would do anything. But I told him all along if he wants kids he could stay home with them. I am not an idiot, and I know it is not easy to be home with the kids 24/7. I think a lot of my feelings came from having a SAHM that was miserable. She never enjoyed being home or having kids, that was clear. & her being miserable made us miserable. For this reason I would never judge someone's choice to work. For some people their kids are better off for it. I know my kids are better off because I work.

Anyway, we always discussed this scenario, and as things evolved, I chose a career I loved whereas my husband chose a career his mom chose. I made clear I refused to stay home with kids if he hated his job. I was unwilling to give up my wonderful job for us both to be miserable. I think he just said what I wanted to hear for a while, yes dear. though clealry I Was right. LOL.

Anyway, before we moved to a less expensive area my husband talked of quitting his job and getting a teaching credential - more of his dream job. I really encouraged him but he never had the guts.

We ended up moving to a new area so that we could afford a house. I found a job right away and he supercommuted for quite a few months. We decided we were ready for children and I think we both thought the other was gonna stay home. As much as we both knew he was the better choice to stay home I think society was getting in his way - he was not feeling good about this choice.

Anyway, someone/something outside of our realm had to smack him. He lost his job the week I got pregnant. He insisted he was going to find a job which led to many fights because it was all in the name of manliness and it really pissed me off we would have to settle on a 30k income at a job he hated when I was doing quite well at a job I loved. Plus images of being just like my mom flashed through my mind. I was not happy in the least.

In the end he never found a job, thank goodness. The first year was pretty tough but has gotten easier with time. I think the worst part was we had just moved where we knew no one and that has been really hard. The support for SAHDs is pretty nil. Over time we have found a lot more supportive parent groups and dh has been working on more and more of his own projects, meeting more people, etc. I truly hope he uses this time to settle on a career he enjoys. I know his mom thinks it is the worst thing ever, but why not follow his heart and his dreams when I Can provide everything else? I am not sure what her deal is. I provide for the family quite well and have ample disability and life insurance to provide should something happen to me. Plus I truly believe he will have the potential to bring in far more income doing what he truly loves than doing a job he hates. In the end that kind of stuff works out. For example my MIL thinks teaching is the worst career. As a second income it would actually be quite WELL for us. The benefits are great and 30-40k would be more than plenty on top of my salary. Plus the flexible work schedule would be invaluable - no after school daycare, etc.

Anyway, that is the long and the short of it. I had no idea though when we made this decision how great it would be for our family. I am so proud every day at the amazing relationship my sons have with their father. IT seems like the best of both worlds to me. I went back to work with my first after 7 weeks and he was fine. We had that mommy/baby bond that just is there no matter what, and in the meantime he has developed just as an amazing bond with his father. & my younger son I took 3 months maternity leave with him. HE needed more time. But both times I had friends just overwhelmed without any help. I have no idea what it is like to care for a newborn all alone. My husband was there with me 24/7. It was a wonderful experience, and glad I had that time with my older son as well. & then back to the real world my husband does the grocery shopping and cooking. & if I Want a night out or a weekend away he is not scared to watch the kids. & when I get home at night I take the kids off his hands and get my time with them too. I guess I know too many moms with un-helpful husbands and I could not imagine. Overall I feel pretty spoiled...

Oh yeah as far as not wanting kids - I was INSANE. I think motherhood is the most amazing thing. If I had to be a SAHM Today I think I could do it. I Wasn't so sure the first few years, but the idea doesn't scare me as much with 2 kids strangely enough - it's more interesting. But for now it works. I think we are really looking forward to when the baby turns 2 and we have a lot more part-time daycare options. Then I wouldn't be surprised if my husband got a job OR went back to school. I Think HE will be a lot happier to have a more regular job outside of just being a daddy. But we've made it over the hump, and just a few more months until our options widen... Overall my husband has done much better with the toddler stage than the infant stage. I think overall men just don't do babies. That is one thing we have really learned - some gender roles hold true - hehe. But regardless how much he enjoyed it, he has done very well raising both boys thus far. In our situation I think it has worked out far better than any other option. & yeah I am glad I was pretty dang stubborn about what I wanted from our relationship. I think we are both a lot happier for it. As hard as staying home has been, he really doesn't whine any more than he did when he worked. LOL. But he is still trying to decide what he wants to do with his life and what job will make him happy. I think that is more important than anything. & me sticking with my career and him staying home has left him with a world full of options, he just needs to decide what he really wants. If the roles were reversed I think he would pick the job that paid the most, regardless of his happiness, and I don't think anyone in our family would be nearly as happy today. Oh yeah except his mom. Ha. But where would that leave us? Gotta do what you gotta do for you...

Spent $2.83 for pepsi and chocolate this morning.

I have been pretty good at bringing 8oz pepsis to work. Pepsi is one of many little luxuries, I need my pepsi to get through the day. I know it is terrible, but my husband buys me the 8-oz cans at the store. Helps me ,limit how much I drink, though probably a pricier way to buy pepsi. Maybe once a week I go out for fast food, $1 meals, but I never buy fast food soda. In the end I come out ahead I guess. Thoug giving up soda would be a lot cheaper, eh??? I'll think about it once I can get a full nights sleep on a regular basis - for now I really enjoy the caffeine - baby has been keeping us up most the time at night.

But alas I went through my last can yesterday and he is going to the store today. So I popped by the corner store and got 20 oz and a chocolate cupcake. A waste of money for sure.

I usually buy the big one and think it will last a few days. Today I got real and got the medium. I know it will be gone by 5:00, if not sooner. Oh well.

I did use to do this junk food run A LOT more often. I have been working on it more for my weight than to be frugal - though the benefits go both ways I guess. But lately I have been having my hubby buy me 2 6-packs at a time. Helps that it lasts longer. Though I still let my stash run out - darn!

$55.00 cash to last 3 months
-2.83 junk
-------
$52.17 remains
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I better slow down...

Ahhhh, got back from Disneyland last night. It was a good trip. I enjoy traveling with a potty-trained child SO much - actually since he is so newly potty-trained - surprised no accidents, etc. Did great on the car ride. Averaged 8 hours each way due to traffic and stops, etc. Oh yeah, and lucky us on the way back - first rain of the season. First rain + long freeway drive = car coated in black muck. $5 carwash upon return home - not in budget. LOL. I am just grateful we only saw 1 accident - you hear the road gets slick with the first rain. & well we really saw all the oil and dirt churned up on all the passing cars.

The weather was perfect. Couldn't have asked for a better trip. We actually happened to get in the park right when it opened (we weren't necessarily gung ho on waking up early but just worked out) and then got a lot in before it started to get too crowded. Left at 4:00 for a nap and dinner. Worked out pretty good. HAd $20 lunch in the park & $10 dinner out of the park. Then returned until close at midnight. My son did great.

All that being said a lot was over his head and he was happy with the carousel. I had no illusion the trip was more for him than us - LOL. But then again thought he would get more out of it. He certainly enjoyed himself though.

All I could think all day was I Was so glad we did not bring the baby. I saw so many miserable parents. & it's like sure you can push around a stroller, but no strollers in line. I Wouldn't have survived more than an hour or 2 lugging around my big boy. Though we did decide maybe we should come back in 2 years, right before baby turns 3. Then he'll be free to get in, but he will be past the diaper and stroller stage. So we hope. It's a plan anyway.

I have no idea how much the weekend cost. Sick of fast food we opted for sit down lunches and a nice big driving break each way so we'll see how it turns out. We did a pretty frugal trip overall, but it still cost an arm and a leg. It amazes me what people are willing to pay for a few days at Disneyland. I would be surprised if our trip topped $400. Maybe $350. 2 night stay, 800 miles in gas, 1 day at park for 3, and food. Plus $12 for a ballon and a lightup necklace. That was our big splurge. I was proud how little we paid for food in the end. We didn't have to pack a lunch, but we did what we could to keep costs down.

That is probably in general our annual vacation budget, we aren't big vacation people. But this year has been kind of unique. We have done a lot of travel already - & 1 more trip to go. Going to Monterey and San Luis Obispo in December. I love San Luis Obispo - if it wasn't so outrageously expensive I would live there. But hubby wanted to do something nice for my birthday since I took him to vegas for his. & then well, that is it. Next year is going to be a dry year. I Am cool with that. We are going to enjoy our next trip for sure. I don't really want to go anywhere with the kids anyway until the little one is out of diapers and bottles and strollers. Anyway, it will be interesting how the whole vacation thing plays out as the kids grow older. My family never did vacations, and we did some bigger things when I Was a lot older. I think I appreciated it more. Dh on the other hand is spoiled rotten. He turned out pretty frugal and okay, so there is hope. But I think he will want to do a lot more travel than I in the upcoming years. We'll see who wins. ; )

Being so close to the beach and the mountains there is really little need for more than the day trips and weekend trips here and there. I am sure even though next year will be dry we will find plenty of day trips to entertain us. I am sure we will make it to the snow and the beach. Will cost little more than gas. Actually, what I look forward to in a couple of years is camping. But as long as diapers are involved, it can wait. In a couple of years I am sure we will be doing a lot of camping. I think the kids will really enjoy.

Awww, what a great month!

Well, I am not implementing my budget yet. But I am tracking it. I am starting on Jan. 1. In the meantime obviously I am trying to implement all I can. The only thing I am ignoring is I had our big Disneyland trip planned already and another small trip in December. I am pretty confident though that with my efforts we will come out ahead this year. From kind of barely scraping by I put money in the savings, and looks like I can swing some savings through the end of the year.

Anyway, got home today and updated all my stats. Retirement funds did awesome this month, good stock market month. Budget was great even though only implemented it mid-month. Had $185 left at the end of the month plus $30 interest all to emergency funds. Threw in a few extra bucks from rounding, etc. and put away $220 this month. Not bad!

I estimate that I will have $150 next month. + interest maybe I can swing $200. I am still figuring out how I will track everything because I like tracking cash basis, put about $1800 of my bills every month go on credit card, and so this is how I have next 2 months figured out. September is dead and gone, but October just about is as I know where every penny will go and the will pay the credit card which has september expenses. It is a little confusing for now, but I want to get it down to a science. Still have not figured out exactly how I am going to track everything. I may just pull 2k from the emergency fund Jan. 1 and start paying everything more cash basis. Just haven't decided. For now the lag confuses me a bit. I have $5k in the fund but $2k on the credit card due. So if I lost my job tomorrow that makes my emergency fund truly only 3k, right? This is why I kind of just want to switch to cash basis. Still use the card, but pay it early, during the month the expenses are incurred or something...

In reality I should be putting $700/month in temp savings for taxes and insurance. I have a long way to go. Put in 0 this month since set for year. But you know, not going to disneyland and charging $250 for a future trip, well yeah that will go a long way to helping. The budget says I will have $700 if I stick to it. I take its word for now. I still can't believe I'll have that $700 + money to spare every month if we just crack down a bit. But any little bit over budget really messes that up, so we'll see. Anything beats the $0 I have been putting in the last few months.

Only thing we really failed at was "grocery" budget. We stocked up on a lot this month and clipped a lot of coupons, and planned meals accordingly. & we spent $100 more than usual. We are still working on it. Hope it pans out in future months. On flip side I budgeted $200 for misc. & $75 for eating out. Under budget for both so pretty cool. I think we will come in under budget many months. But I like having a little wiggle room for the months we want to splurge a bit. There is definitely fun in my budget.

I have $55 cash leftover from gifts. My goal is to stretch it out through Dec. 31. No ATM. When we are good we don't go to the ATM for months, so we'll see. Basically my personal eating out budget rest of year - quick runs at lunch and eating out with friends - only time I pay cash really.

Just made $20 selling my Cookie Lee Jewelry. I didn't have to do anything, just had a co-worker ask to look at the catalog and took an order. She said she may order more.

Just got a check for $120 ($60 profit) from another co-worker, but already counted that money in a blog last week - went to gymboree.

Anyway, my problem is I sell the CL just to get the discount and buy my own. I was thinking of quitting this year. I have to spend $300 (or sell $600 - I only pay 50% - annually). I just couldn't see forking the money this year. I think I only sold 1/2 what I need to. With holidays coming up I was invited to a group show so I think I will sell there - I can make $300/show. IT really isn't bad, just after working FT I feel time with my family is more important, so I generally don't do the show thing, though the money is pretty good. I also just don't have the personality for it. I can hand out a catalog and take orders but that's about it. & I think it's important to like your job. I don't like shows so I Won't suffer. I rather live on a shoestring. 1 show a year is fine. But try doing 1 show and not getting 100 referrals. Truth is it is a great way to make money. It just snowballed too much for me so I had to quit.

Anyway, if I do this particular show or push my wares a bit I may be able to get my minumum and sell another year. I do not think I have spent a dime this year on the jewlery. Yay me!!

Anyway this week: + $5 costume, +$20 jewelry + $90 anniversary gift = $115 this week thus far. The week isn't even over. If every week was like this hubby would not need a job in the least. ; )

Oh yeah - I forgot to mention at seminar yesterday was so funny. I totally wasted $4 on that puzzle book because I forgot I signed up for seminar with the comedian instructor. Funny funny class. But it was so ironic because he had a huge section on BUDGETING and personal finance. The class was "Tax Planning for Families." Did I learn much? Not really because guy jokes more than he teaches - LOL. But he does compile a huge list of useful websites. If savingadvice.com is not in the list I will e-mail him and have him add it. I have the feeling it is. He is sending us his updated sites in a month or so. We'll see.

I have been SO addicted to this site I was looking for a breath of fresh air and getting budgeting off my mind for a day - stuck in class. No such luck - LOL. Was just too funny...

Alas, I said yesterday I never spend money. who me? But alas today is a bit of a big spend day. OR today and yesterday.

I have seminar today for my job. So will cost me some extra gas, and lunch, but luckily not parking today. On the days it costs me parking too, eh, it's for my job and my CPA license so what am I gonna do??? I know I do not have to eat out but I Decided to splurge. Don't worry I never eat at the $20 hotel lunches - my goodness! But I am looking forward to a little Round Table Pizza Buffet.

I also stopped for gas last night and decided to grab a puzzle book at the grocery store. $4 down the drain, but good for my sanity in case class is too boring, and to fill in the breaks. I bought one a few months back at seminar and my husband and I got completely addicted to fill-in puzzles aka griddlers. Unfortunately I could find none of those puzzles.

Oh yeah - but I filled my tank for $30 - WOOT!!!!!!!! Ever since we got the van I have been a little stressed not only in all its "newness" but I underestimated its gas guzzling ways. Plus gas has been sky high - I have filled the tank many a time for $50. Gas has dropped from $3/gallon to $2.50. It was pretty sweet... Plus it had been 10 days since last fill-up (instead of my usual 7 days) and my tank wasn't completely empty. I know my hubby's car can make the 400 miles to Disneyland on 1 tank so if we fill up here I know on this end will only be $25 instead of $30. I had no idea prices had dropped so much since I haven't gotten gas for 2-3 weeks myself. Yippee.

Then tonight it is bunco. I don't play for the money. I swear someone invesnted the game just so moms can escape for one night every month. ; ) & that is why I go. My old group I played 1 year and came out ahead, and this year I Was weary because buy-in is $11 instead of $7. BUT 2 nights already and I won upwards of $50 both times. So I made enough to play the rest of the year. I am feeling lucky tonight!

Instead of running to the store last minute I did buckle down and make brownies for tonight. I had to plan ahead and this week was not the best week - it has been a little crazy. But saved a little $$$. I did make pre-packaged brownies so wasn't as frugal as I could be, but they were already in the cupboard - a sunk cost.

The downside is someone is bringing a pony keg (football theme tonight) and announced she paid $60. I wish she had gone in with a few people. I thought if we all gave her a buck or 2 it would even out, but not everyone will so I'll probably give her $5. From my bunco winnings last 2 months so whatever. I may even spot her more. Oh well. I have only played with alcohol twice, I am not much of a drinker and neither are my friends. But it is a little more interesting with alcohol involved - LOL.

Anyway, if you don't know what bunco is, it's a dice game pretty much all luck (no strategy). So wish me luck tonight. I want to win BIG. ; )

***Three-year-old buys pink convertible on Internet***

Tue Sep 26, 7:31 AM ET

LONDON (Reuters) - Jack Neal briefly became the proud owner of a pink convertible car after he managed to buy it for 9,000 pounds ($17,000) on the Internet despite being only three years old.

Jack's mother told the BBC she had left her password for the eBay auction site in her computer and her son used the "buy it now" option to complete the purchase.

"Jack's a whizz on the PC and just pressed all the right buttons," Rachel Neal said.

The seller of the second-hand car, a dealer from Worcestershire, central England, was amused by the bid and agreed not to force the sale through.

"Luckily he saw the funny side and said he would re-advertise," Neal said.

=====================================

Just saw this and had a laugh.

Disneyland Story:

I just wanted to say it was funny because I do not know how many people have asked about our Disneyland trip this weekend and said, "How long are you going? What? Just ONE day????" I am trying to think back and I only ever remember going one day. In fact, I thought we were splurging, because with the toddler we figure we better stay 2 nights. Drive up, sleep, 1 day at DL, sleep, and all day Sunday to drive home. IT's about all we can squeeze in. & then the whole, with gas so insane, "Isn't it cheaper to fly????" I budgeted $60 for gas and that will do. Get me 3 airline tickets for $60 and you got me sold, I live down the street from the airport - LOL. & I think 1 day in DL is about all my son can handle. I know he will be EXHAUSTED. Even flying is such an ordeal I don't think it would save much time. We could fly down Friday afternoon, sleep, go to DL one day, and fly back Sunday. Doesn't really lend to more time at DL.

Granted, in all my one day trips to DL, we have never been to CA Adventure, or Legoland, or any of the new parks. Maybe sometime down the road - in years - we'll make a week of it with the kids. For now 1 day at DL is more than enough to entertain the 3 of us. & yeah I think we are going more for us than the kid - LOL. Baby gets to stay home with grandma. Phew...

The other night hubby was out and I gave the baby a wooden spoon to turn his buckets and tupperware into drums. He was having a blast, but my 3-year-old got a little jealous. HE wanted a spoon too! So I gave him one. I noticed it started splintering and told him to settle down with it. But he was beating the hell out of this spoon. It culminated with the spoon snapping in half. LOL. Okay, no more spoons for him.

The funniest part was the next morning my husband looked in the trash and could not fathom why there was a broken spoon on the top of the trash. HE approached me and was like, "What were you doing last night???" LOL.

My son was SO cute Friday too. Wednesday driving home from preschool we stopped by a used bookstore. I just heard a woman in my moms' group owns this store and it is right around the corner from his preschool. So we went in, it was a pretty nice store, bought a few books for ds - $5 maybe. So of course Friday he says he wants to go to the bookstore again. BEing very budget minded I told him we could not go. & mentioned his preschool is sucking me dry - LOL. I put it nicely because I do not want him to stress about it. But all the same I want him to know we can not do x and x because we are putting our effort into this one thing that he LOVES. & as a result we sacrifice other things.

Anyway, he was really cute because I started telling him about how cool libraries are and I Would take him to one soon. We used to go a bit, but since the baby, hasn't been very fun - LOL. But I am thinking we can start fitting in weekly library visits. I was telling him just how cool libraries were for letting you BORROW books, and you don't have to pay money. HE just got all excited and said "I want to go to the library NOW!!!" I did tell him that the library unfortunately did not have cats like the bookstore did, but at this point he was too excited to care. Was just cute how he got so excited. & glad I found an alternative to his beloved bookstore. ; )

This week stinks. Older son was sick (mild), then baby (worst). Then daddy, and today me. Plus side I didn't miss any work and hubby was well enough for me to sleep all day yesterday. Downside, weekend sucked. LOL.

Anyway, when I Was whining about my budget I didn't say the PLUS side. Unless I am missing something, which I may be, I found the $700 or so we need to set aside every month for insurance/property taxes. I had been settling on $300 and then I haven't even been able to do that for a while. The budget is a wonderful thing.

We also figured out a compromise on preschool. We are looking to switch ds to 2 full days a week. IT would save us $15/week, save money on gas (don't have to take him home at lunch) and goes to my other goal of focusing on maximizing money from my job. Right now I take him home at lunch 2 days a week and leave early one day since he has to be picked up by 5 on the full day. LEssening all of this nonsense to 2 days will be great, especially with crazy tax season coming up. 2 full days is just super cool enough it won't feel like less to him. HE LOVES the days he stays all day.

$60/month saved. + gas and time saved. (probably $10 gas per week).

We are clearing out the storage before we have to pay another month. $56/month saved.

Eating out - I am narrowing it down by $75/month for now. Not that we always spent $150. We never really eat out - don't even ask - it just seems to explode with a family of 4. Though I don't remember the last time we all 4 ate out together. ??? So I am not sure how it adds up so fast. I will be looking closer at it.

70 + 56 + 150 = $276/month saved.

I whittled down my misc. category to $200/month. It put our annual budget in to the positive numbers. Woot. Maybe +$100 for the year - LOL. But something. Implementing it will be another story. We'll see how it goes.

It seems silly for hubby to get a job when I can work overtime and get $33/hour. I am focusing on working OT 3 hours/week the rest of the year. That's $100/week. November is iffy but October & December the work wil be there. Downside is I get this paid randomly by bonuses, and if my boss feels I am just not productive he won't give it to me. For this part of the year though I should be working more, and I should get it in the form of Christmas bonus, which would be great.

Hubby is knee-deep in an unpaid video project right now, but he is looking into seasonal things all the same. Something temp to bring in a few bucks, help out the end of the year.

The downside of our budget is we really have no room for the unexpected. I guess that is why me working more and hubby working will pad our emergency fund a bit. I want to get that sucker UP.

I just did a quick annual budget and it was pretty depressing...

I put in everything month by month for the year, and I know Oct - Dec is off, because I pretty much went off my 9 months data in Quicken. I didn't even put in christmas - too depressing. IT is just possible christmas cash received will be greater than christmas purchases, so we'll wing it for now.

With that I had a $1k loss for the year, but lately the in-laws have been pretty generous and throwing $1k at us here and there. It will cover it.

It's super depressing because rates on everything seem to raise come January. Just hope I get a raise to cover inflation.

I didn't detail the clothes and DVDs, etc. we buy every year and just threw in $300/month. THat is just for everything I didn't have categorized really - probably more than sufficient. Throw in vacation to that category too. I put 0 on the vacation budget because this last year we went to Vegas and HAwaii (Hawaii was paid for but we still spent $500 - on food mostly). If we can't afford to go anywhere to stay in budget, so be it. We had a good run this year.

I skimmed through the budget and all I Saw was insurance and gas (to drive to work) and stuff that just can not be cut. I decided in the meantime we just can't save a dime. Yes, the gardener, the preschool, and the cable all stand out as not necessity. BUT they are necessities to our sanity. There is just no way. IF we couldn't pay the bills, fine, but for now it all has been working out.

On the flip side, we were looking to move this summer and we are paying $56/month to storage. That can go... So by the end of the year I Want to make it a priority to clear out the space. & give up on moving - we just can't afford it right now.

As far as eating out, we can scale back. Maybe go from $100/month budget to $50.

Looking at the budget those 2 things popped out. I hadn't even really thought about the storage until then...

Beyond that I am paying $215/month on that personal loan. When that is paid off it is $200/month to build up our emergency fund. & if I get a raise in January, the same. So there is some hope.

I didn't even include the extra money we receive here and there from other work and other windfalls, etc. So it probably isn't as dire as it seems. We usually save all of this above and beyond the norm.

That's about all I can see for now. Hubby has to get a job, plain and simple. Something steady. We'll give it a whirl next summer probably. Another $200/month steady income would be pretty sweet right now, doesn't have to be much...

So what happened here??? I can narrow it down to 1 thing - preschool. I looked into it last April and found something for about $300/month. Just M/W/F 4 hours each day. But in this area that is about as cheap as it gets. I had some money saved, and figured we'd give it a try. IT was a bad move - LOL. No, it was a great move for my family, but unfortunately we absolutely fell in love with the place and there is no going back. We are now paying closer to $365 so he can stay all day Wednesdays. HE just loves it so dang much ... Plus gives the baby some one-on-one time with daddy. When I look at the budget it glares at me, but it has crossed the line to necessity. My son has just blossomed there like you wouldn't believe in such a short time. & cutting back would no less than break his heart. So yeah, before this and the loan we were doing pretty good. & since then things have been pretty dang tight.

So what do we do, we will go find more income. & we are working on cutting little things as well. Every little bit helps...

I just wanted to clarify that this is a pretty temp budget. We are just trying to bide our time until the baby turns 2 next summer and childcare options are more abundant and cheap. Thus the reluctance for hubby to get a job before then. Work is crazy for me December - April because of tax season and with a sleepless teething baby I am not sure we can handle much more.

I realize I am pretty stubborn on a few things in our budget, but we have a lot of untapped earnings potential and I Want to tap those first before we start cutting out certain things.

I am working on saving $300/month on health insurance which would kind of wash out this preschool predicament we have gotten ourselves into.

Regardless of our savings my boss is adding 10% of my income to retirement. An extra bonus as the more overtime I work, the more goes in retirement. I really just need to work more...

A strategy I am looking into is a PT job for my hubby with full health benefits. There are a lot around (state jobs & healthcare jobs). Full benefits would save us upward $600/month. This is the worst part of our budget I Feel. It really bugs me - we are not even 30 yet and I shudder to think what our premiums will be next year when I hit 30. Imagine if any of us were actually sick or something!! : ( Oh well, we officially can no longer afford our healthcare...

Well, I could go on and on all day about the advantages of having a man who stays home while the woman works. (For 1 - maternity leave is pretty awesome - kind of like vacation with both of us home).

But I just found the big downside - vasectomy!!! It's like 5 days of no lifting - yeah right with a baby. I Am just hoping we can squeeze it in this year. I have 3 days vacation and we'll make it work. But I keep thinking to all the men I know who were back to work in 1 day. & then I think - duh - most office jobs don't require heavy lifting like my hubby's job does. Blech. Big baby boy is 25 pounds and not walking yet, so I got to stay home a few days with the kids.

We'll work it out. I just really wanted him to take care of this this year, because I wanted to switch to a high-deductible plan Jan. 1. We just can no longer afford our premiums. In the meantime, I will call and ask how much the procedure is. THey told him today it was only $250, but I find that hard to believe. IF that's it, piece of cake, we'll be saving $300/month with reduced premiums. I find it hard to believe because that is what they charge us NOW for any procedure. I think he was misinformed. ; ) Then again, as a preventive measure - maybe. Costs them a lot less than a pregnant woman I guess...

Oh anyway, he went to an info meeting on it tonight, since he finally called the hospital, etc. HE came home pretty whiny and I am afraid to say I Wasn't very sympathetic. After doing the birth control thing for many years and giving birth twice, eh, I think I have done my duty. I am actually just about doing the happy dance that the responsibility is shifting and I can throw the birth control out the window.

I am working on my budget and I am just planning for the worst when it comes to medical. Maybe we will be paying the big premiums another year. If he can't get the big snip now, it will be next summer earliest.

Anyway, I read on here about using Quicken and budgeting in Excel, but it just seemed kind of silly. Anyway, I was researching spreadsheets today for work and I started getting distraced by all these personal budgeting spreadsheets. After looking at them a little closer I started seeing the benefit. I think I Will give it a whirl. Dh is gonna go crazy because I started entering all of our grocery items more detailed, etc. I swear all I do in my spare time (what spare time?) these days is budget, invest, etc. Oh well, but I like it. I have done budgets in excel before, but I guess over the years our finances have just got so dang complicated. So I am working on a budget for next year - just putting something together, will be tweaked as we go for sure. In the past I just used round budgets, and I budget enough in my head that I always know where we're at, and we neevr spend more than we have. BUT, I need to get a "down to the penny" budget written down that we can stick to, and so we can work on our savings a little more.

Monthly budgets are nice, but I keep getting thrown off by the one-time expenses every year. So I am working out some all-inclusive monster budget. We'll see how it goes. ; ) Then I can track our progress each month. But I really look forward to seeing the big picture. (Or maybe not...).

Dh has been taking the grocery shopping thing pretty seriously. HE has been stocking a lot on sale, and though we rarely buy brand names, the few things we do, he is coming home with generic lately. Hope this helps the bottom line... I got a bunch of Target coupons and think I will go stock up on some things as well. A big investment this month, but worht it down the road.

LOL. I could not resist posting this.

To date these are the kids' favorite toys by far. I know I Said in an earlier post that most of the people I hang around of late do not get any concept other than spoiling their kids rotten. & I am always saying they don't need every little thing their heart desires. Anyway, their favorite toys are case in point I guess, that you don't need to spend a lot of money to keep your kids happy. ; )

I got the shovels and buckets (10 or so buckets in total) for $4 off of ebay. It was probably $12 once you consider shipping, but I needed a bunch of beachy stuff for a beach-themed party. I handed a couple to the kids because I didn't need them all, figuring we'd take them to the park in the future. I can not believe how much they play with those inside the house. My 15-month-old's favorite toys by far!

The tupperware are hand-me-downs from grandma (notice the 70s color scheme) and they are the nicest tupperware pieces I own by far. But this was always a favorite toy for my older son, and now baby is enjoying.

I kicked off my socks yesterday after a walk because it was so hot and baby played with them the rest of the evening.

Oh yeah, and when I was gathering toys for this picture I spotted his little credit card. It was one of those little paper ones you get with the credit card offers. For some reason baby claimed it and thinks it is the best toy ever. I don't know if this means I will have extra trouble teaching him about money, or he will be easy - LOL. It is kind of funny though the way he carries that thing around, almost like a security blanket. It's making me a little scared...

In short, a bucketload of fun for $12.

I also think it is kind of important for the kids to play with toys that are not flashy and electronic - not all the time (believe me they have PLENTY in that category). I don't think we have done as good screening with the baby, have gotten lazy, but it is nice he enjoys some of the non-flashy things. A lot of the time, he prefers them...

When I Tell people we have really had no debt, except our mortgage, they look at me like I am lying for the most part. LOL. I think the general concensus in mainstream society it just can not be done.

I have had people tell me that it is impossible and I can't have a decent credit score then. Well my credit score last I checked was 700/800. But that is another post for another day.

Anyway, as far as the school, people then say - well your parents paid for your school. Um, no. I went to public school & community college. IT so happens the college in my hometown had a pretty stellar accounting program, but I didn't even know what my major would be when I started. That was the point my parents said uh uh no way. I really wanted to go to UCSD, but wihtout a major in mind my parents said I could go to community college or State for a while, and live at home. I did State for 5 years actually, but supplemented with classes in the summer at community colleges.

I was pretty stubborn and moved out on my own pretty fast. I was frustrated my I was out on my own and my parents weren't paying, but that I could not get assistane due to their income. I just had to work a lot of jobs. THe last year I had a semester or 2 paid by sholarships though.

I probably learned how to survive overall from my dad who's parents were too poor, and so he did it on his own. So I followed his example essentially.

I am sure my parents helped a little, but it was not an expensive education overall. Nothing that would have left me in debt either way.

I have taken this philosophy and am not into college funds for my kids. My goal is to pay off our mortgage by then so the money is there if one of them decided to be a doctor or a lawyer. BUT beyond that I leave it up to them to work for it if they want it. I have been pleased after being told over and over this is dumb, that Suze Orman agrees. ; ) I know we can pull the money together if they need help, but they are going to public school, that I Can guarantee...

The other thing no can believe is I have never had a car loan. My philosophy has been to always drive old. Find a car with lo miles (30k at most) that is a 7-10 year old model - even older - and you get a new car that is pretty dang depreciated. The key here is to have a trusted mechanic to give you a thumbs up befoe you buy anything. Though I did look at plenty of cars that at a glance you could tell were not worth it - not maintained well, etc. Big red flag. IF you go for those well- maintained cars, guess what, they look as good as new too since they are so well cared for. I wouldn't say we have had junkers, we have had nice cars, they have just been old. We have 2 very nice cars today. We have probably saved 100k over the years in car payments and interest. I am even getting a cute (used) sports car just for fun in a year or 2. We'll have the money no sweat with all we have saved on cars. & mostly that has freed up a lot of money for other things.

But it is not just the big things. The furniture in our house and a lot of our clothes. IT is all used, used, used. At face value no one would know. We buy the things that people bought and turned around and sold the next day. You can get "new" things and take the benefit of depreciation. Washer and dryer - we have always gotten used ones from the paper. $50/each and we used for about 10 years. we just recently bought a new washer/dryer because we felt we had the money. BEfore then the used did us well. Honestly, I miss the old ones - I like them better - LOL.

Another one is we wanted a 2nd fridge so we got one out of the paper for $50 or so. Was a little ugly but just sat in the garage - what did I Care. ; )

I spend $100/year on my sons' wardrobes. USed/used/used. I mostly buy things neevr worn and with tags still attached.

I have hardly bought a baby item new - people use them for such a short time - there are a lot of nice things to be had used.

Look out for those used bargains and watch yourself bound ahead financially. & keep in mind that used does not always mean it was really, well, used. Take advantage of the things that other people regret buying. ; )

I do like to think that one day we will buy some more "new" stuff. But the more we have the means for the "new" stuff, the more I don't want to waste the money. It really feels like a waste. & Frankly we still can't afford it years later with substantially more income and assets. Maybe one of these days I Will have enough money that the idea of buying new won't feel so overwhelming. In the meantime, I keep buying used...

My general philosophy on Christmas is I pretty much don't like it - LOL. Our family and friends don't really want for much AND the materialism of Christmas really annoys me. I would rather give give give all Christmas and not receive a thing - donate toys for kids and work in the soup kitchens. Unfortunately, most people I know do not feel the same, or I would totally donate money in their names as a gift. I probably should regardless of what they think. ; )

Anyway, we generally don't spend much and I have never budgeted for it. Most of our family and friends have stopped exchanging gifts, because we all feel a little similarly I guess. I don't remember the last time dh and I exchanged gifts, we just don't see the point, we buy/need what we want throughout the year. I guess it's a pretty good place to be. Though if we had more money sure we'd splurge on each other.

BUT our downfall is the kids. Every year I say I will spend $20/each and donate $100 each in their name because they don'tneed anything and there are plenty of kids out there who really need things at Christmas. But inevitably we stop by Toys R Us and all the toys suck us in. I See cute thing online, and next thing you know I spend $200 on the kids + the $200 donation.

Anyway, due to our usual finances this overage never really made much difference, but this year it just ain't gonna fly. LOL. I don't have $400 to spend just on the kids. So we'll see...

& dang it when I Say I am just going to spend so much on the kids, I want to stick with it. Putting it in writing will make it an easier goal to stick with I am sure. I hope anyway. In the meantime I am staying away from all toy stores and toy ads. ; )

& as a total case in point I bought the kids picture frames last year that spell out their names. I just saw them sitting in the closet unopened. That is not going to happen this year!!!

I am going to go work on a budget!!!

Bad Idea!!!!!

Eh, it probably ain't the worst idea. IF you are a planner and disciplined, etc., etc. they are a bad idea. If not, maybe they are good for you.

BUT, in recent years I have heard more and more of mortgage companies not paying your homeowners insurance and property taxes on time. I think it has come to light a lot more in recent years as homeowners insurance is so hard to come by, and the increased outrage of being dropped when your mortgage company does not pay your bill for you.

But here is a new bad in this equation -a VERY bad incident with a family member. They paid off their house in the last year or so. (Very good, right????). Apparently, this family member had the impounds set up. Upon paying off the mortgage, and not receiving a bill when the homeowners insurance expired for the year, it lapsed.

Maybe they would have fiugred it out sooner rather than later, but right after the lapse a woman tripped in front of their house. She threatened to sue for injuries due to a large crack in the sidewalk. They called their insurance company to discuss their options, only to find out they did not have coverage. OMG!!!!!! IT is a blessing that they found out so soon, but the curse they found out too late.

The city denied responsibility for the sdewalk due to a new law in the last few years that homeowners were responsible to call and tell them if there were repairs to be made. Something like that.

Just a BAD confluence of factors, and unfortuantely my relative will be left holding the bag.

Anyway, hadn't heard much in a while and assumed it went away. Found out today they are officially being sued. *sigh* That just sucks!!

As it stands, insurance companie have agreed to pay anything above $100k and they are maybe okay with that. However, said relative has been bursting with glee that retirement is in less than 2 years for her. does this mean she will have to work longer???

Will this case be thrown out as frivolous??? Stuff like this just doesn't seem right...

Send good thoughts I guess.

In the meantime, if you do have impounds and you pay off your mortgage soon (or have paid it off recently), make sure you don't lapse your coverage. Because only you are looking out for you.

Bummed to admit we went over on our minutes for about 5 straight months. I really have no idea WHY. I look at our phones as an emergency vehicle, not much else. Though I do use often to call long distance.

I am not sure if we had EVER gone over our minutes before this last year.

Anyway, 2 months we went over in a planned manner because we were on vacation and used them out of convenience. At least once we paid extra that month for more plan minutes. Plus both vacations cost $0 to us so we decided more money on the phone was okay. But I have no idea why we have gone over every month since.

We cracked down this last month and I Was shocked to just open our bill and see we were 30 minutes over. That is $12. Blech!! So much for cracking down.

I have a habit of calling my mom whenenever I am out. & from work since it is long distance. Whenever I am home I have pretty much resorted to the land line at only 3 cents/minute. It's nothing really. & from work I ALWAYS call and have her call me right back.

Obviously I called my mom too much from the car this last month!!

This month I will try harder. I think overall I will get back to the emergency mindset and just put the phone down. I bet you all of those calls could have waited until I had gotten home. ; )

"Live like no one else, so later you can live like no one else" -Dave Ramsey

"The more I am willing to be disciplined, the more numerous my options. The more carefully I plan, the bigger I dream, the better my life becomes and the more joy I experience." ~Mary Hunt, of Cheapskate Monthly

I have heard the Dave Ramsey quote in recent months and the Mary Hunt one now on this site. I LOVE these quotes so much, they speak to my lifetime financial philosophy.

Those around us scoff at many of our financial choices, our choices to buy very used cars (people looked at me like I was crazy when $5k was my car spending limit). I don't spend money on makeup and clothes, and I have many friends who think A am absolutely deprived. I don't like coffee and never go to starbucks, again always with the peer pressure (why would I drain my money on something I do not LIKE???). & then mention not being able to go to a $100 spa on the weekend (I hate massages and all that anyway - I guess lends to my frugal nature) & imagine the looks of PITY!! Beyond that I think last week I did not want to spend $25 to go to a concert for kids. OF course I sound absolutely deprived.

People do not realize it is not that I Do not have the money or the means to do so. But I choose other things with my money. Obviously what I value is reflected in my budget. & things I do not value I do not mind giving up in the least.

On the flip side, people come to our house and their jaws drop. YEah my husband has a dedicated home theatre room, but with some frugal choices it probably cost less than most t.v.s I see around here. HAving a 5th room on a house for this dedicated room is another story, but we moved somewhere cheaper to afford such. Yeah we have a really nice house and a smaller mortgage than anyone in our age range that I know. I just think it is proof that the little things add up. I think the only thing more shocking than seeing our house is people finding out they are paying more for rent or mortgage than we are on our mortgage 90% of the time.

I have been told I Am stupid for not believing in ARMs, but all I know is I Can sleep at night. & I have locked in a low rate for the next 30 years, what can beat that?

The looks of wonder and amazement when I Was able to take not only the standard 12 weeks maternity leave (CA has disability pay for this time) but even another month or 2 even though my hubby doesn't work.

The jealousy that my hubby doesn't work.

I get the feeling that many around us have not put 2 and 2 together. The sacrifices have reaped the rewards.

So seeing those quotes just nailed it all on the head for me. We do really live like no one else it feels a lot of the time in all of our frugal choices. Yet I also get the feeling we live like no one else in our options. & as mary Hunt points out, I Feel that we are happier than the average joe blow as a result. I love my job, I feel like working part-time to support my family is an option down the road, and I guarantee, barring the unforeseen, that we will retire young.

Okay, so I Was just reading another friend's blog on another site and she is extremely religious. Her ends were not meeting, and she prayed, and the lord provided with extra money here and there.

Well, I am not religious in the least, but I have a similar post - LOL. I guess personally I Always find that things just tend to work out. IS there some higher power that arranges this? I am not so sure, but haven't ruled it out. But anyway, when things don't work out, I know I try my best to make them work. & I know in my friend's case she did not sit and wait for the lord to rain money on her, she did have quite a hand in it herself.

Anyway, so in this case I have a little bit of *luck* and a little bit of *action* on my part to thank.

I wanted to sign my baby up for Gymboree because I wanted to do something special 1-on-1, and my work schedule has just sucked at me being able to keep up with friends and plan playdates. With my odler son we did the weekly park playdate, but those friends have moved on and did not have further babies, etc. I frankly don't have the energy or the will. If I pay for a class, it is not very frugal, but I know I will be motivated to show up every week, and I do not need to keep the energy to maintain friendships. At the same time, I feel bad for the interaction my younger son is missing out on. HE is home with homebody daddy during the day and sees lots of older kids with me (brother and his friends) but not much of kids his own age.

So I signed him up. It was about $180 for the rest of the year, and like his older brother's preschool I figured I Would make it work because I think it is important.

I did have friends pushing me to sign him up for Baby Signs and Kindermusik which came out to $20/week - just INSANE. Gymboree I could swallow at closer to $11/week. + you can take him to free plays up to 2 times a week for merely another $20 over 16 weeks. I am sold!

I played Bunco this month and won $75!!!!! I paid $11 & won $75 for a net of $64. I just started the month before and won that month as well, so this was pure profit. That is the luck part.

I have been chasing a $65 refund from a music studio for my older son since may. I just got a tip from a friend who to talk to and when she is there to get the refund. Sent dh yesterday and he came back empty handed but woman is looking into it (we were told 3 times check is in the mail by owner already). He swears he will not leave without the check if he has to go back next Wednesday. I believe him - surprised he was so soft on her yesterday.

Finally, I made $60 this month selling my Cookie Lee jewelry.

Add it all together and I have my $180 for Gymboree - woot. I am a happy girl.

I was also going to make around $200 helping a neighbor/client set up Quickbooks (on the side). I was going to use it for Gymboree, but now I think I will put it in savings. This month has proved well so far!

I have been reading about Pinecone (survery) and am considering giving it a whirl to come up with the $20 for the Gymboree free play days. We'll see!!

Anyway, Gymboree through December is taken care of and come January he will be old enough for the Community Center classes whch range from $5-$7/week. Phew.