Monkey Mama*s Monkey Money Blog

We got the "bad" news that it was indeed a stroke that my father suffered. A "small" one, but a stroke all the same.

He will probably be put on disability. They are saying it will take 6 months to see if he recovers.

For now we are very much on "wait and see" mode. More tests, more appointments, etc. He does not return to work until Monday, from vacation. Phew. It's nice they have time for this all to sink in before they figure out their next steps, etc.

My mom is not in 100% health and I imagine we will spend many future weekends helping them out - with whatever they need help with.

They are entirely too young for this!

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In other news, our kids are completely spoiled. They are going to Disney World this fall. MAke that 4 years in a row for them (DLand, DWorld, Dland, Dworld).

MIL has been pushing and we were not interested in the least. Considering finances, time off, etc., etc.

Silly me! I really thought she had let it go, though it has been brought up many times.

Yeah, what do I know.

It came up over the weekend and she pretty much said she would help pay (she's never invited us on a trip and not paid) if dh's dad was still working in the fall. He's not expected to - he is supposed to be laid off in June - and retiring.

Anyway - I honestly think she is completely full of crap. Like she only says that so we will go this year, which is her whim, obviously.

BUT, dh does have his GRandDad there. We had been talking about going next year anyway. I've personally been sidtracked with dreams of Kuai though. We figured MIL would pay and we'd do both, regardless. We certainly couldn't do both on our own. Florida is far more expensive since it would be airfare for four, as opposed to 2. My budget does not do airfare for FOUR!!! IT would need some major revisions, that is for sure.

Anyway, she mentioned my BIL could not get the time off, as I hemmed and hawed about money and vacation time. I finally told dh later that he should take the opportunity. IF the three of them could go for "free" then they really should go. They went without me last time. & I survived. & I don't mind putting off paying for ourselves to go to Florida in the future.

My only wish this year was not to travel anywhere. So hey, everyone is happy!

I know my MIL was a little annoyed by our conversation though. We just bought our GPS and we are talking about going to Hawaii next year (airfare for TWO being our only real expense - maybe $800 total). & I assure you she was rolling her eyes when we brought up Florida was not in our budget. Well, MIL, I don't know what world you live in, but I need more than FOUR MONTHS to save up for a vacation, for FOUR, to Florida. YEesh! So yeah, that whole thing, drives me nuts. Which is kind of where our resistance came in the first place. Let's plan a trip like a year or 2 in advance, like normal people. Maybe we can pitch in a bit! I Can assure you we wouldn't have just spent $500 on toys if I thought she would "win" this whole Florida thing. !!

Dh and I have both been a little tired of these last minute trips, on some level. I am personally tired of MIL controlling all things vacation in my life. Since I don't GET much vacation time. But the fact of the matter is dh and the kids have a lot more time to spare, than I do. & I do think they should take advantage. Particularly if there is any truth to the matter that the vacation gravy train would run dry in retirement. Seems reasonable it could. So just in case, I think they better go.

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It's 97 degrees here. BLECH!

A local blog was featured in the paper today. Excellent article and excellent blog.

It's about eating well on a small budget. LOVE it. Mostly my personal philosophy except I know hardly nothing about cooking.

I am definitely bookmarking this one.

http://www.poorgirleatswell.com/

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I've never been a fan of tofu or soy in particular. I guess with age I am less adverse to it.

I have surprisingly become a fan of soy beans, but dh was scared to deal with it. He just didn't know how to cook it, etc. I kept bugging him to buy some and I'd figure it out. Yeesh.

Alton Brown came to the rescue. We recently caught a Good Eats about soy beans. & the best way to cook them? MICROWAVE! Dh was then sold. !

We also tried this recipe - divine:

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/roasted-edamame-salad-rec...

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In other news, the weather was so HOT we finally opened up dh's "window sill herb growing kit" we got him for Christmas. I figured the warmth would be good for the little seeds.

The heat did its job. Instructions said 7-10 days for things to start growing. Um, how about 2-3 days?

The front window sill (spacious) has proved a good spot for out little herbs. If our little pots and prepackaged soil don't do the job, this may kick our butts into doing a DIY window herb project. That being said, the only problem is the cat. Hope she stays out of them... Will see!

We could try outside. I have no idea how herbs do in the heat though.

Well, for now they are growing, well and FAST! Cilantro, chives, basil, oregano and ???.

Our front window mostly faces east. Maybe a smidgen to the south/east. South or Southeast is recommended. Close enough I guess. Getting sun is not a problem!!

Back from "vacation" I guess.

We went to go help my parents and see how they were doing, etc. My dad has had a series of medical tests, but no results yet (not expected until Tuesday I guess). He was starting to feel a bit better late last night. As time progresses we are convinced it was probably a small stroke. He had other symptoms that have since been ruled out as drug side effects, etc., etc. Though I guess we should know more next week.

His vacation is over next Monday, and if he turned a corner, he may be able to return to work without even telling his employer. Will see. Otherwise it seems he is well covered for disability, etc., and after talking to everyone and their brother it seems the general concensus is with time, and maybe therapy, he should (shortly) be back to 100%. Though his doctor did say something like there is only 50/50 chance of full recovery. But everyone else tells us otherwise. 100%! From their personal experiences. Positive thinking is good.

His mental function is pretty amazing overall, so I felt better after spending so much time with him this weekend. Trouble communicating, yes. But otherwise he seems fine. & it certainly isn't getting him down.

He certainly can not drive. We spent the weekend doing yardwork and housework, cooking, and playing chauffer. My mom can not do a lot so I know they really appreciated the help. (The GPS came in handy with the whole chauffer thing!)

The hardest part for my dad is sitting still. We noticed he did better with rest. But like hell he will actually rest.

So that's the long and the short of it.

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I spent a couple of nights at my parent's house and I slept like a BABY. LOL. It was divine. I slept in until like 10am the other morning - I don't remember the last time I slept past 8am. I am not much a fan of sleeping in. But it is nice once in a while. Certainly would never get so much peace and quiet at home.

Since we were going to help my parents and were worried, I didn't exactly look at the long weekend as a "vacation." But it ended up that way. We just had a really nice, simple weekend. My dad and I took the kids for a walk to the creek by their house the other day. The kids spent most of the time in Grandma's pool and on my parent's tire swing. We didn't really do much else. I expected it to be a hard weekend and came back amazingly refreshed.

We decided to come home last night since everything seemed well under control. I wouldn't be surprised if we spend many weekends there though in May/June.

I told dh I had the maybe the first twinges of regret ever for not being closer. BUT that didn't really last very long. Dh and I discussed much how if we lived closer we just wouldn't necessarily have the TIME to help them out. We would both be working, for sure. It's such a catch 22. In the grand scheme of things we can help plenty - the distance is not long. I appreciate that we are close enough to help substantially. Dh has all the time in the world to help them, if nothing else. The distance is give and take.

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Of course, the weekend wasn't all "good." We went swimming yesterday for a long while and it was a bit chilly so we spent a good chunk of the time in the hot tub. We have noticed BM is a little sensitive to pool chemicals. He gets bumps on his elbows and knees which seemed to worsen over the weekend but get better with bathing. (It doesn't seem to matter which pool - so generically figure it is the chlorine).

So we spent a chunk of time in the hot tub/pool and I made sure to rinse him off real good when we got out, hoping to lessen his skin irritation.

Well we got home rather late last night and when he undressed for bed we realized he was pretty much covered head to toe in a pretty bad rash. Ugh. We called the doctor and stocked up on Benadryl. I think it's safe to say he won't be hot tubbing again for a long time. Though we are not quite sure what is going on, the hot tub is easy enough to avoid. He's fine; just itchy. & red.

We actually had a fun BBQ to go to today, but not sure we will be up to it. It wouldn't be the worst to have a day to laze around the house.

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Completely off topic, but dh and I were having a discussion about healthcare on our drive home last night. We were talking about healthcare costs and obesity, etc. I had told dh many times that most of the SAHMs I know did not cook. At all. That fast food seems just as much a way of life for 1-income families as it does for 2-income families, around here.

I don't think dh believed me, but it has come up a few times. I truly appreciate all his home cooking and the good examples he sets for our kids (which they would NOT get from me - I was raised in a horrible environment as far as food). Our kids will eat anything - their experience is completely opposite of mine and I am very appreciative they haven't taken to my bad eating habits.

& what dh feels is the "bare minimum" or what is expected of him, he doesn't realize is a truly huge gift in our society. I told him the "bare mininum" is frozen meals or meals out as far as I was concerned. In this day and age. To him, the bare minimum is a home cooked meal every night. IT's his "job" in his eyes.

So anyway, as we were discussing it he said he was starting to believe me. I guess the women at tee ball were talking about how they never cook, etc., the other day. & I guess dh had to bite his tongue. He was thinking, "Pffft. It's not that hard and certainly not that time consuming." Clearly eating well (healthy home cooked meals) is a priority for him.

I told him I appreciated him biting his tongue. Something he is not usually good at. But yeah, I could just see him telling a bunch of women that "cooking is not that hard." LOL. He could really get himself into some trouble.

I need some positive thoughts for my family.

Last week was a little dramatic as my dad thought of quitting his job. They had decided, prior, to stay in the pricey Bay Area and to retire there they will have to work longer. Well, my dad will. He will be working until the bitter end regardless. He LIKES working. Probably where I get it from.

Anyway drama at work, and unsure if the place will survive anyway, thinking of quitting for sanity and maybe a little pre-emptive too. Of course, this means a large possibility that they may just retire and move (like, anywhere - because anywhere would be cheaper). Though they aren't sold on Sacramento (summer heat & lack of engineering jobs) I guess I can work on them. At least housing prices are rock bottom.

So I Was both a little bummed and worried about all this. My dad had a 2-week vacation coming up and was basically going to "sleep on it." I know they will be fine. But you know how it goes.

Fast forward to Monday. I am home sick and feel like hell. I am trying to REST but dh wakes me up to tell me my dad is in the emergency room.

Details are vague, but in the end it seems he suffered a "mini-stroke."

That was the original diagnosis. They sent him home and he has a slew of tests and doctor appointments. They sent him home after CAT Scan showed no signs of stroke.

I started out panicked because my mom hands the phone to him and I realize talking to him how dire the situation is.

Things calmed down when they sent him home.

This morning he had an appointment and no one called me. I started calling around noon but phone is busy all afternoon. I finally talk to my dad around 3pm, who sounds horrible and I can barely understand what he is saying. I talked to my mom who tells me he sounds worse. Yeah, no kidding.

So of course this got me MORE worried.

I guess the unofficial diagnosis is TIA (mini-stroke - which means 30% more likely to suffer a stroke). However, dh told me from his internet reading that a TIA is when the symptoms last less than 24 hours. So it worries me it's been longer and he sounds worse.

He has some appointment to ultrasound some artery tomorrow (to check for blockage) and a MRI later in the week.

I guess once we got more info yesterday we thought, this sucks but we will get through it. Today I guess it is sinking in how serious this all may be. He can not speak very well and can not write either. No one has assured us the damage is not permanent.

His mother had PArkinson's so they are evaluating him for that. He also has an appointment with a neurologist.

I watch that show Medical Diagnosis way too much. Where it sometimes takes YEARS to diagnose these things. I only hope we can have more answers sooner.

My dad is only 57...

He's one of those who has 9 lives. If anyone can beat this thing, whatever it is, he can do it. I think it's the only reason I am not falling apart right now. We weren't going to go see them until Thursday, since I wasn't feeling well enough to travel yesterday, and things had settled down. Now I am not so sure.

Anyway, my family has had a rough few days. Some positive thoughts would be appreciated.

It's been spendy!

This is a purchase we have been looking at for about 2 years. No rush. We had decided to buy one for Christmas, but dh wasn't impressed with prices, etc. I don't remember precisely why we passed up the purchase. Just felt it wasn't time.

So yesterday he saw an ad for a decent deal and looked into it. We ended up finding it at Wal mart for about $190. We were originally looking at some of the $100 ones, but they didn't really have the features we wanted. Which I think is why we decided to wait. Instead, this one has way more features than we were even considering.

We went to a wedding out of town yesterday and tried it out. It is AWESOME! LOVE it! We have been borrowing dh's parents' GPS for more and more trips and have become increasingly reliant on it. It really makes travel so much easier! Some of the added features are that it tells you speed limit (incorrectly at times though) and has a lot of traffic data. It correctly predicted a traffic slowdown due to construction, on our way home. It also has bike and pedestrian modes, which we haven't explored. It if actually has like bike trails on it I will be in pure heaven.

It also tells you all the nearest police stations, gas stations, hospitals, etc. I am sure the older one does too, but it wasn't so obvious/easy to find all of this data.

It's a Garmin and was very similar to dh's parents' GPS, so we didn't have to spend any time figuring it out. Though I enjoyed playing with it on the long car ride. IT even chastised me for using it while the car was moving. Hey, I was a passenger! LOL.

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I've decided I know the perfect place for frugal people to get married/have receptions, in California anyway. If they want something truly elegant, go for a public golf course!

We had our wedding and reception at a public golf course in San Jose. IT was A+.

Cinnabar Hills Golf Club:



Not sure if we had ever been to another golf course wedding or reception, until last night. I was JEALOUS! Why hadn't we heard of THIS place?

Picture does not do it justice. The views were just incredible!!!! I know, I know, we didn't do half bad. But if I saw this place I would have picked it.

Boundary Oak Golf Course in Walnut Creek, CA



Which reminds me, we haven't been back there since our wedding. We will have to go back for an anniversary lunch next year for our 10-year. The though just never occurred to us before. But suddenly the idea seems so simple and exciting.

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I also have an interesting article to share:

"Summer Vacation: What Should Isaac Do?"

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB124252957050027380.html?mod=...

I shared because I have been reading these father/son articles for a while and find them interesting.

I also thought this was a particularly interesting topic.

I think I'd sum it up to, "It depends on the Person." Though considering the economy, if my kids were graduating high school today, I would have them strongly consider summer jobs. Simply because I think if they had a job it would be harder to find another one down the road, etc. I think it's a fair lesson in these times to not give up a job! I think in these times we have to ask, do we really have the luxury to not work and put vacation ahead of reality?

That being said, I am extremely practical and I come from an extremely practical family. If I said I was traipsing off to Europe the summer after high school, my parents would have thought I had lost my mind.

Of course, delving further into it, though my college experience was not exactly easy, looking back I am amazed at the balance I was able to achieve. I know often this debate comes up (working in school, etc.) and it becomes very black and white. If you had to support yourself at all you become in debt and miserable and you miss out on everything. & many people who had a positive experience on their own feel that having a free ride and not working when possible means a lifetime of irresponsibility. Obviously the truth is somewhere in the middle. Everyone's experience is unique.

As for me, I worked all through college out of necessity. However, I always took the summers off. I never took summer classes and I even got a full month off work every summer. I met my spouse in college and we dated. I would drive to visit my friends who went away to college, most of my weekends. I look back on college VERY fondly. I remember a lot of leisure and fun times. Sure, I probably never worked harder in my life, but I made sure to have plenty of balance, for my sanity.

I even planned a month long trip to Europe during my month off one summer, but my friend ditched me because she wanted to spend the whole summer there. She felt sorry for me and my responsibilities (rent, tuition, etc.)

Looking back I don't even regret it. Most of my friends have traveled Europe extensively, and though I have been to Europe, I admit I haven't had quite the same experience. That being said, I have learned over the years I am of the more practical side and I am not sure I would have particularly enjoyed the trip. I feel personally it was for the best, for me.

Since most of my good friends do have major wanderlust (probably as a result of having little responsibilities and deep pocketbooks to dig, in college) I have thought about it much as we age. A lot of the same friends seem to have a fair amount of discontent in their lives. I know in our college years I was the "boring one" who had to work and had a serious relationship. But when you fast forward a decade I can't describe the joy that my children have brought to my life. I feel I have been on my own completely exciting adventure. I guess I personally feel being practical and "boring" has paid off in the long run. But it could maybe be summed up as easily as "balance is important."

Experiences are also relative. Compared to my parents' college experience I had much more leisure and freedom. So I was never going to sit and cry I didn't have money in pocket and entire summers free to do whatever the hell I wanted. I was blessed to have food, shelter, education, and leisure, to boot. I always felt extremely blessed for what I did have.

& I have also been blessed with plenty of travel opportunity in adulthood.

So the practical side of me says Isaac should work. Of course! That being said, he needs to find balance in his life. & he has to find it in the way that makes HIM happy.

This is largely why I stray from planning my childrens' life down to every detail. I could end up suggesting completely different paths in college, for each of them, based on their personalities. I always cringe when people say that, "My child has to do x, y, z, because that's what I wish I did." Or because, "That's what I did." I try not to have a lot of preconceived notions. Probably easier said than done, but I do try!

It's been a while since I have made a "big purchase." You know that dh makes plenty - hehe. But he does all the research and shopping, when it comes to anything electronic.

For whatever reason, I am the tent buyer.

The tent process has been rather long. We have been searching reviews on the tents we see in the sales ads, and haven't come up with much. The quality of most of these isn't great and we rather spend a little more for something that will last.

Overwhelmed with all of the choices online, I found a recommendation for a few tents and narrowed it down to one. The price was $115 new though could easily find on sale for $95. I think we kind of aimed for $100 after looking around a bit. Meaning we didn't want anything much cheaper. $200 was probably our upper limit.

So today I was perusing all the tents on sale in the ads before I finally made our final purchase. (We had put it off to May and then just got busy).

While online I saw a tents @ Overstock ad. I have shopped Overstock in the past though seem to have less luck with it any more. But I hadn't looked at all so I thought I would peek.

I immediately came across "the one." I just loved the tent and it had nothing but glowing reviews. Price was on sale for $199.99.

Overwhelmed with all the tent options this is the first one that really "stood out."

I looked @ Amazon and saw it had free shipping (possibly no sales tax) for athe tent at $189. I wasn't surprised that Amazon had a much better deal than Overstock (considering shipping and all). Has been my experience lately.

I was looking up further reviews on the tent though and came across the tent at REI for $159. It was funny because I came across it quite by accident. & shipping was free if we were willing to pick it up at the nearby store. win-win.

I did one last look at biz rate and also checked REI coupon codes. This was by far the best deal - it didn't even pop up on any price searches.

I am pleased. With taxes and everything the total was closer to $170. But the full price of the tent was around $220, so I am happy with the price. I think for another $50 or so we got much higher quality than we were originally aiming for. Which we were definitely open to spending a little more for.

It should be ready to pick up next week. Woohoo.

It's literally the only tent we have looked at in our price range that didn't have one negative thing said about it. So I am pretty optimistic about it.



When it arrives we will be doing some backyard camping (nice if it does arrive before next weekend - it is estimated to). & we will be taking it camping in June. I think this year is just a "backyard camping" year, but if it works out we intend to use it more.

Since I don't expect to use up our vacation budget this year, it comes from there. We have the cash, of course!

We haven't pursued our internet switch much further because dh had a lot of technical questions and they were going to schedule someone knowledgable to call him or come out or something.

Anyway, he hadn't heard anything in a while, dug out the sales guy's card, and found the associate's phone # was disconnected. So he needs to call Surewest again and find someone else to get the ball rolling. No wonder no one ever followed up!

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In the meantime, the other day dh told me he wanted to hook up Boxee for his dad. Basically, make him the Boxee guniea pig. He was telling me a bit about it and of course it went over my head. Something about a computer for watching T.V.

Today I went home for lunch and we crossed paths briefly. He showed me all the Hulu programming we could stream on Boxee. I think he wants to try it for his dad first (the whole guniea pig thing, but he also thinks it would fit his needs well). So I asked, "Does this mean we can get rid of our cable?" He actually said... MAYBE.

Woohoo!

At this point he said the only downside he could see was we would lose Discovery channel. Which he is hesitant about. So I told him, "You want to pay $60+/month for Discovery channel???" I think we will survive.

Anyway, I looked it up since yeah I had no idea what it was, overall:

http://www.businessweek.com/technology/content/may2009/tc200...

It isn't HD and of course dh is not happy about that. BUT I think we both hate the whole cable/satellite business enough that he is excited about another alternative. Even if it isn't quite up to his standards yet. (He watches all sorts of HD programming through the computer/projector setup, which is another reason he will probably be more willing to live with some non-HD programming. He'll get his HD fix regardless).

& heck, maybe we can put off that HDTV purchase for a while then...

I don't think we are dropping cable any time soon, but it looks like we are heading in a good direction. I told him it's up to him. The cable is for him. I watch more T.V. than I should, and I could certainly do with less. At this point I never dreamed dh could ever live without cable, so him even talking about it has me very happy.

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In addition to all this, dh noticed a problem with the TV when he was setting up the Blu Ray Player. He thought it was maybe the Blu Ray, or he was imagining it, but some parts looked too dark or something. (I can guarantee I would never notice anything!). Anyway, he did a web search and came across a lawsuit regarding our T.V. IT was for the problem he noticed and we had until end of June for a free repair. Go figure! In the nick of time I guess.

They are sending someone out to fix the t.v. next week. Phew! I am glad he found it in time. Though I may have never noticed, I know it would have driven him nuts.

Most people (more in real life) would assume I obsess about money too much and I never have any fun. (How can you have fun if you don't spend money??? OF course WE know there are other ways to have fun...)

So this post proves the contrary.

It is probably true that it is easier to spend money with a credit card. I may even be guilty. BUT my issue with cash is I just have no idea where it goes. I don't have the patience to write down every purchase. As such, by putting everything on the credit card, all I have to do is push a couple of buttons on my computer to see how much we spend this weekend. I think most people think I spend hours on this stuff when I only spend minutes. I really don't spend a lot of TIME on it. I did go back into Quicken and try to categorize the cash I did remember spending over the weekend

Anyway, our spending for the weekend:



The only other money spent was about $20 on gas for a tank to get there and back. (Took the gas sipper, of course).

Not bad, for quite a nice mini-vacation, in my opinion.

The kids ate free at Denny's, we had a $8 coupon for the Aquarium, and we had a couple of free dinners. Not sure how that would make us deprived though, pinching just a few pennies (er, dollars)...

& here are pictures from Point Lobos. The Aquarium was pretty fun, but we took more pictures at the beach.

Views and wildlife:











That last one was a seal.

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& basically it will cost us $20 gas and $10 parking (which we could skip if willing to walk more) if we ever want to go to Point Lobos again. It's an affordable luxury.

Reminds me, our plans to go to Kaui next year are starting to take shape. Dh asked his mom if we could use the timeshare next year and she got SO excited when she realized it was our 10-year anniversary. When he mentioned it, at first she was kind of like, "What are you talking about? Married 10 years?" I guess time flies! She got so excited I wouldn't be surprised if she ends up covering our airfare or something. Not planning on it, just wouldn't be surprised. We are definitely going. She will see to it. LOL. I was literally like, "It doesn't have to be 2010." & she was like, "OMG, it has to be 2010!" I think she felt bad she didn't realize we were nearing this milestone.

Now I just have to stay married another year. I think we are up to it.

My plan for now is just to keep an eye on airfare. Will jump if we see a screaming deal. We have a good year+ to look! & we have to narrow down a date...

I am super excited about this trip! It will basically be the first big trip we can really afford (mostly on our own - we've always had the free timeshare usage) since having kids. That is something to be excited about!

We want to go to Pismo Beach without the kids this year, as well. We will probably trim that trip down a bit to save some $$ for Hawaii. I think we will still go though. Probably less days and cheaper hotels. Nothing set in stone yet.

We returned the photographs to the school and they boomeranged back.

!!!

It just keeps getting better!

I think they are going in the shredder.

Literally, BM's teacher is new to the school. I can only assume that she has never come across this sales tactic (she is young - though she has taight a few years before). BM said he handed them back to her and she told him to take them home. LOL.

I am just laughing because it keeps getting better. It's better laughing than banging my head against the wall!

Gotta love this.

I am sure for many of you this is not new.

Our school did spring pictures and we did not order any. So we get a package of pictures of our son, and a bill for $50. Oh, that or return them if you don't want them.

SERIOUSLY???

Okay, dh puts up with little crap and usually I am like, whatever. But this just REALLY pissed me off.

We discussed complaning to the school and shredding the pictures. Like hell I Would take my time to return them and play their little game.

Anyway, this happened right before we left Friday so we were griping to our parents (one who is a teacher) and they were like, "Oh no - you HAVE to return them. It's standard practice." Seriously? I was completely floored that this is "standard practice."

Against our better judgement we just returned them today. So the company can shred them. Gee, great. Knowing that just about every photograph company does this changes things a bit, I guess. The thought hadn't crossed my mind. (Though I assure you I wouldn't lose any sleep if they didn't get returned for any reason).

Then out of curiosity I did some poking around online. I came across this discussion, which I think summed it up pretty well:

http://www.twopeasinabucket.com/mb.asp?cmd=display&thread_id...

Isn't amazing how many people FALL for this? Who feel guilty and send money for things they never ordered (because they lost it, etc.)? Can you imagine what kind of world this would be if this were really a LEGAL practice? If all businesses this this?? IT's not LEGAL!

We will still complain.

I kind of regret sending them back. I assume they will just get shredded though. Now that I think about it why do I want pictures of my kids out there, etc.???

& it amazes me that people believe they are morally obligated to pay for pictures they did not order.

You have a moral obligation not to "steal" the photos - like scanning them and returning them - for sure.

But paying for an unsolicited service? I don't think so.

I had to share because it saddens me how many people fall for this stuff. Ugh! IF they really want the pictures, is one thing. But paying out of guilt for something you didn't order? They really do prey on uninformed consumers.

BTW, the pictures were crappy!

If they want to send proofs and an order form, that would be fine with me. But this is just really crappy if you ask me.

I thought you had to watch out for credit card companies and used car salesmen. I guess I'll add school photographers to the list.

No one's left the house in months it seems. For any length of time. (Well, some of us - but not all of us at once).

So this weekend, we went away, and I tracked the energy usage of the house while we were away. For about 54 hours.

The result was: 8 Kwh per day.

The most I can think of is the DVRs and the fridge. I noticed when we returned the baby monitor was on. But it's hard to live without and a pain to turn off. Next time I will have to remember to turn it off and pin down the energy usage there though.

I also got the electric bill for the last 30 days or so. Our bill was again 10% lower than last year (thinks to the CFLs mostly). It was interesting because we had a hot streak and used the AC a bit. Though not much, apparently.

Our average daily use for April was 15 Kwh per day.

I don't know if our 8 Kwh baseline is good or bad. It doesn't sound great for no one being home and nothing going on. Then again, using only twice as much electricity when people are always home, and all the cooking, laundry, computing, and TV watching that goes on, etc., isn't half bad. April is a low electricity usage month, overall. The longer days mean less light usage too, I am sure.

BTW, it's 85 degreed here today. Ugh!

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Well, I blogged last week or so I needed to get more active to lose a few pounds. Every spring I try to get a little more active from the busy/uninviting winter, I guess.

I think I did extraordinarily well the last 10 days. Honestly, most of the days I did no activity I was worried about pushing it/injury. So I threw in some days of rest. Phew. OF note, I sipped aerobics Thursday (bad I guess) and I stopped home to change and was going to drive over to the park so I wouldn't be late for BM's game. At the last minute I decided I could at least walk. He wasn't expecting me anyway, so what was a few minutes late? Anyway, I walked home faster than dh could pack up the kids and drive home - teehee.

Current Month Tally:

May 1 - None (rest day)
May 2 - 1 hour aerobics/yoga/strength train
+clean house +walk (to school) +lots of exertion (set up for festival and on feet for a long time)
May 3 - None

May 4 - None
May 5 - 1 hour aerobics/yoga/strength train
May 6 - 30 min. power walk (gym)
May 7 - Walk to park for game
May 8 - 30 min. aerobic activity @ gym / Rode bikes to school
May 9 - Walked all Day
May 10 - Walked/paddle boat/2 hour hike @ beach

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Mother's Day was Divine.

I received:

*1 can of pringles
*A day off work
*monkey cup
*home made heart pin
*downloaded CD (new band I like)
*Weekend in Monterey/Carmel
*A sunburn

Actually, we had the BEST weekend.

Friday I took LM to "Fairytale Town" (glorified park). I needed to get the paperwork for the June campout there. I took LM to a puppet show - something I never had done. I kind of wanted a special day with him, and I made clear this was something I had never even done with BM. He had a blast.

Once LM got out of school we drove to San Jose and stayed with Grandma. My parents were invited over for a BBQ. Yum!

Saturday we woke up pretty early and got the Monterey Bay Aquarium before it opened. IT was AWESOME! I had really wanted to pull BM out of school Friday and avoid the crowds. But dh talked me out of this for whatever reason. Being practically first in line was pretty special. It was a while before it got too crowded.

Around lunch I told dh all the people with kids would get tired out and maybe it would thin out a bit. IT was crowded, but not horrible. OF course, I looked at our kids and wondered if they were nearing the end of their ropes. BM was a little cranky. I Was too, but I just needed some food and advil - hehe.

Anyway, the kids got their second wind and we actually stayed until closing. Usually we make it such a rush of a day trip - it was just really nice.

We went to Ghiradhelli for ice cream after and noted the place (the whole area) was pretty quiet for a Saturday. Though maybe it was a bit early. Dh's favorite hot sauce place was empty / shut down. *sigh*

So yeah, the Aquarium was pretty packed, but the rest of the area seemed a little slower than usual.

We stayed at our "suite" at Motel 6 and it was pretty nice. Far larger than we expected. There were 20 rooms and we were informed that was the only suite on the premises (not surprised - how many times do you see suites advertised at Motel 6). Funny thing is the room cost the same as all the others anyway... But was nice with the kids and all.

Dh actually lugged his "not working well" DVD player so we could watch a movie. We may do that again sometime - worked out well in the end.

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The next day we made it to Dennis the MEnace Park (always want to go, but never have the time). They had a little lake with paddle boats so we did that.

We headed over to Point Lobos after that. I am not sure I really had heard of the place, but Analise mentioned it in her blog and we decided to check it out. Okay, we are in LOVE with the place. Best thing is it is a wonderful day trip for us so I am sure we will be back again.

On the way there we stopped in Carmel for lunch. We did a lot of aimless walking because we found a terrible map and weren't paying attention. Along the way we spotted our neighbors though. It was hilarious - what a small world. (We were only 3 hours from home). We finally found a "reasonable" and cute little restaurant. In the end the tab was pretty high, but the food was just divine. & they handed me a HUGE chocolate covered strawberry on the way out - for Mother's Day. VEry nice.

Then we went to Point Lobos and started out a little frustrated with the parking situation. We quickly got over it. We went for a nice walk and we spotted so much wildlife. Lots of little rabbits, and we even spotted deer on the beach. (I had no idea there would be deer on the beach. I heard dh say something about a "deer" and pointing to the ocean and wondered what the heck he was babbling about). I did at some point say it would be a miracle if BM made it home in one piece, but other than that, we had a great afternoon there. He just has NO FEAR. Lots of running and jumping along the cliffs. YEah... I have no idea where "Mr. No Fear" came from - just completely opposite from the rest of us.

Dh had wanted to go to the beach/state park in the a.m. because of thoughts of sun burn. The rest of us don't particularly burn but dh is very fair and prone to burning. So basically it never would have occured to me to bring sunblock. I said we should be fine, we would just go to the store on the way and get some. Sounded like a good idea. Well, since I don't burn much, I totally forgot. Not sure what happened to dh. We are all sporting nice RED faces today. LOL. The funny thing is LM is probably the most "fair looking" of all of us. But he didn't particularly burn. Those are my genes. The kids overall were fine. But dh didn't fare so well, and I am not so sure I have ever been so burned myself. Live and learn...

On the way home we stopped in San Jose for dinner, with Grandma. IT was just really a nice way to break up the drive.

I think dh at some point estimated our weekend at $350. (Of course, I forgot, I recived $50 cash).

We got a couple of free dinners though and yeah, I think we did good. I told dh this reminded me precisely of what got so many people in such a financial mess with the bubble. We had friends who would drop $500 every weekend on stuff like this. We even approcahed it rather frugally. $350 was fine for a weekend - no doubt. But once a week or once a month - living like that - we'd be broke too!

Oh well - I will share the true cost - and some pictures - later!

I've mentioned before my family is a huge Alton Brown fan. (The kids totally LOVE his show, Good Eats).

The cool thing about Alton Brown is also that he would appeal to any frugalite (he makes beef jerky with fans and air filters - teehee - and does not recommend a lot of kitchen items that can't be multi-purposed).

That being said, he uses a lot of kitchen utensils we don't own (he is a professional)! So I am surprised it has taken this long, but dh just bought a stick blender.

Of course, the recipe that sold him was this one:

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/lentil-soup-r...

It's simmering on the stove right now. I'll tell you what we think later.

The piles of 5 star reviews look promising though.

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ETA: YUM!

I was actually going to go for the beachfront, but the price went up (harder to get beach room - having procrastinated a day and trying to book a room for this weekend!)

It worked out for the best. I found a Motel 6, more central location, for about $80. It had better reviews than just about any hotel I looked at in the $100 range, anyway. It's even got a separate room for the kids. So, I am pleased.

I told dh we should go back and stay at that beach hotel another time. It would be a nice place to stay when we had more leisure! In fact, we are planning a trip to San Luis Obispo/Pismo BEach this summer so it may be nice to stay in Monterey one night, on our way down, to break up the drive a bit. Either that or I will keep it in mind for my birthday. It's a great weekend getaway since we would probably drop the kids off in San Jose, with Grandma, and it's only an hours drive from there.

-------------------------------

Anyway, I am looking forward to our mini vacation this weekend.

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Not much else to report.

I enjoy seeing our net worth edge up. Though I really don't think the worst is over with the stock market. Enjoy it while we can I guess.

Work is a little crazy. Just still in "catch up" mode. I do envision it being a little slow late into summer and into fall. Or I could just be crazy. But for now there is so much stuff to catch up on!

I've spent the last few years doing 40-hour weeks. I am not quite sure if I can swing it the next couple of months. It's too busy. *sigh* I know, I should just be thrilled to have a job and to be BUSY!

**I got my gas bill and was surprised how low it was. I have been commenting on many other blogs to not compare energy usage dollar to dollar. Dig deeper and actually look at the usage. Our gas charge, per therm, dropped significantly this year. I noticed when comparing winter bills to last year.

So I looked closer at our current bill and saw that we had the exact same gas usage as last April. We just paid $15 for 15 therms this year, as opposed to the $22 we paid last year. That's a 30% decrease in the cost of natual gas!

I guess it's not suprising considering how high fuel costs were last year, in general.

Our summer bills tend to be in the realm of $10. Maybe they will be $7/month this summer??? Will see!

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**We decided to spend $250 of our diverted vacation fund on a new Blu Ray player. (Leaves $350 to spare). That one is a long story, but our entertianment center is jinxed. Nevermind most of our electronics are more than a decade old. Every item we move in there goes kaput. Dh put his old DVD player in there (bought 1996?) and it went kaput. He put it in there because the PS2 (in the same location) stopped playing DVDs properly. The CD player (circa 1990?) also went kaput.

He now wants to move the newer/nicer DVD player in there (Was bought for movie theater room, but replaced by PS3), but I am not so sure. I think the entertainment center is jinxed. I know our stuff is old, but we have a lot of older electronics. & why is it all going at once??? Can't help but wonder if there is more to it! Not sure I want to jinx one of the nicer pieces of equipment we own.

Anyway, it's a long story but I don't mind. I know a lot of friends and family just roll their eyes when dh buys more equipment. BUT, he buys stuff at a good mix of low cost and high quality, and literally keeps it forever. In the end such a small portion of our income goes to this stuff, and it really is the ONLY thing he buys. Literally.

He had been toying with the idea of buying another PS3 for a blu ray player. So I am relieved with patience he found something in a more reasonable price range.

We could buy a cheapo DVD player to get through a year or 2. But I am pleased his first DVD player lasted until we made the switch to Blu Ray. It's been a good 12/13 years. We decided we didn't want to add to the electronic landfill since we were pretty much ready to move on anyway.

We've also been talking about buying a second HDTV next year. Will see. Dh is chomping at the bit and may pick one up if he sees half the deal we got on our last one. But overall we agreed to start keeping an eye on sales, etc., when LM is out of preschool. IT will be our "we are free from preschool" treat I guess.

**We had also been discussing going to Monterey and actually staying there a night as opposed to our usual "day trip." So we decided to go for it.

This is where I clearly realized, I rather buy STUFF. LOL. We like buying stuff. We can keep it forever. We can get continued use from stuff. We don't hoarde a lot of stuff, and our stuff doesn't define us. But I do notice the frugal crowd goes more fore experiences than stuff. I guess we are just odd. But hey, what else is new.

Stuff can be returned. Stuff can be sold.

Spending money on an experience is not extremely appealing to me. If nothing else, if I Spend a decent chunk on an experience, my expectations are pretty high. & it's more likely than I will be dissapointed. If my vacation sucks I can't sell it or return it. !!

So I am trying to book a hotel. The prices really aren't that bad. We are looking at $100 for any Motel 6 type place. But it's Monterey. That's for all of us, including taxes, etc. IT was cheaper than I expected.

BUT, we can stay on the beach for about $160. !!!!

I agonized over it for a while and I asked dh what he thought. He was no help. HE said it was Mother's Day - I should buy the beachfront night if that's what I wanted.

I expected him to talk me out of this nonsense.

I went to bed leaning toward the beach room but figuring I'd sleep on it.

Today I am leaning towards the boring room miles from the beach. LOL.

The beach room is a good deal and the place was recommended by multiple friends.

But, I don't know if it's really worth an extra $60. Ugh.

I usually don't identify with the struggles over purchasing stuff. But here I am being just as ridiculous over a hotel room. Guess I am guilty of not wanting to part with my cash.

I think the other part of it is we are so unaccustomed to spending any money on vacation. Literally. Any more we always get a free room stay through the in-law's timeshare. So I thought splurging on one hotel night would be easy, considering all the free hotel stays we get. Instead, I cringe at the thought of spending so much on something that is usually free. I know, I am weird!

In comparison, we are going spend 2-3 nights in 2 more expensive hotels in the summer. But one I have been to many times and I LOVE the place. The other one we have been planning to go to for years. It's just different. I know those are worth the money.

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I just had to laugh at myself though. We were checking the hours at the aquarium and I peeked at the prices. I actually originally did not want to even go to the aquarium "because it is so expensive." Dh talked me into it when we realized the kids hadn't been in a long time. Whatever. It's kind of our "spring is here and we want to do lots of fun stuff" kickoff trip. We can go.

So I peeked at the prices online, and they weren't half bad. I guess it's been a while. With younger kids it was harder to justify. Today? I would hardly call it expensive. Funny how quickly one's perception changes.

--------------------------

LM is sick so I am kind of holding off on the hotel decision. Will probably book it last minute. It figures if we lock ourself into a pricey room and someone else gets sick. Kind of why I Am leaning towards a boring hotel room right now. Not sure if we will all be well enough to even go. *sigh*

We had been so flush with cash, etc. this year I was bummed when the tide turned a couple of weeks ago. It seemed like money out, out, out all of a sudden. Not that I could complain. When it rains it pours - but it goes both ways. I figured the tide would turn for a while...

But it turned back the other way. I got paid Friday along with a couple of reimbursement checks. Not that exciting, but we took the car in and it seems it is nothing. Mechanic said he could replace part and maybe engine light would stop coming on (for $200) but that he'd have to order it anyway so it was up to me - call him next time the light comes on and he can order it.

Will see...

So we got off easy yesterday.

I had him change the oil while he had the van (more pricey - but worth the "convenience" to cross that off the list - he had the van all day anyway).

I told dh he needed to get his oil changed too (when I realized it was May - we change them every 6 months. Our last mechanic got us on this schedule. It's fine if you don't procrastinate or forget. & I guess depends on your auto and driving habits - my caveat. We mostly do freeway driving -neither of us sits in traffic - so less oil changes are fine in that case).

Anyway, dh told me when he got home he found an oil change coupon in the paper. I think that was the first sign that things were turning around.

Later his mom called me to ask some questions re: our family camp trip for this summer. Turns out she had paid for us (we expected to shell out $600 - the biggest piece of our vacation budget for the year). Um, okay? I was stunned. (I guess since last year she actually let us pay! )

I know, on some level it's not surprising. But to me it was so out of left field. For now I am letting the money sit. We had been thinking of spending a night in monterey with the kids and a few nights in san Luis Obispo later in the summer. Though I don't think we will need this $600 for that.

Oh yeah - we will pay for my dad's camping fees. Almost $230 since he is not a resident. So only really leaves about $350 to spare. But I think we will just plan not to touch it - and use it next year towards Hawaii. May cover airfare for one. Makes Hawaii seem more likely. Woohoo! I think we will just leave it and see. Our $1500 vacation fund this year was mostly going to go to camping, and then a couple of weekend trips around the state. & season passes to an amusement park. Wasn't even sure if we would use it up anyway. Will think about it, but mostly I think the money will remain untouched in our savings account. We can think about it at the end of the year. (Assuming no catastrophe comes along).

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All the net worth posts reminded me, my net worth was up almost $11k as of 4/30. Go figure! I don't think it means much in terms of where we will be 12/31. But it's nice to see such a nice upward tick.

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ETA: We cleaned house today and dh thinks I threw away his oil change coupon. (I didn't see it and I searched the recycle bin - I looked at every single item - I think he's crazy. I didn't see it. I told him if it was where he said it was, I didn't see it and it's not in the recycle bin).

I hope that's not a sign!

Figures...

I mentioned in my last post it's just been $$$ the last week. Figures I wanted to go to aerobics twice this week and my card runs out today. I haven't bought a card in like 3 months. Why TODAY? LOL. Well, for Saturday class anyway.

Just stuff like that. In itself not a biggie, but then 10 thing piling on at once is not good!

We also made an appointment to take the car in tomorrow. The minivan of course. The window also stopped working again. Though I wrote down which fuse to pull out and put back on (supposedly the magic fix - which I should try because if it doesn't work we'll ask the mechanic to fix it again - while it's there).

The engine light keeps turning on and then off. It was during tax season so I ignored it. I Can be pretty intent on taking the car in for the first sign of anything, but this car most of the time it's nothing. So I give up. It cycled on and off a couple of times and now it's been *on* past a second gas fillup. So I figured it's time to stop dragging my feet. I toyed with the idea of ignoring it another week because this was a bad money week. Then I thought better of it. Putting it off and making it worse isn't exactly the best course of action. I have plenty of cash for an auto repair - big or small. So yeah - time to take it in. The van's been completely fine otherwise. Just a little light that keeps turning on and off.

Reminds me dh's car is coming up on 100k miles and probably needs new tires soon. Something to look into this year.

All of these things are minor compared to buying another car. So no, not complaining!

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I don't know why, but BM's school delights in having all of their fundraisers in March and April. I am not entirely sure how they have been going because I completely ignored them all (too busy with work). THough I grumbled to myself why they didn't have any fundraisers the rest of the year. Gah.

Well, I got my chance. They are having a big event this Saturday and they needed 7 volunteers from every class. Guess how many they got???? ONE! Well, one besides me. So I offered to cover 3 shifts to make up for lost time. I volunteered for 2 slots, and talked dh into a third. It's my first Saturday of the year not working (pretty much) but the day is looking pretty busy. Oh well - it will be fun. A change of pace, for sure.

**The tide has definitely turned. We have been flush with cash infusions the last month or so. Last week the tide turned. Now it's just cash outflow. Mostly little things, but I swear if I get one more "$50 surprise" before Monday ("month end" for us). Gah. Just one of those weeks.

I am thinking we may have to pull a little money from my bonus after all. I am not sure. We over splurged the month of April which is our other problem.

I have mixed feelings about May. We have a pile of events that will mostly cost us little. We picked out a tent that we were going to buy next month. Since we have a wedding to attend there is the whole wedding gift thing. So it's still adding up, regardless. We have discussed going to Monterey, but haven't decided much. We talked about even spending the night there and not being super cheap like usual. But, we'll see. That can come from the vacation budget, so it doesn't really matter either way. But yeah, May will be BUSY.

Looking ahead to June, I am taking a week off - happens to be BM's last week of school. I figured I Would enjoy the peace and quiet the first part of the week, and time with BM the rest of the week. We have a camping-thing planned for one night and a trip to the minor league game (with the preschool) on another night. I think it will be a very nice staycation. Though I had wanted to maybe go on a day trip or something, BM only has Friday off and the campout is Friday, so I think it will just be a staycation. We won't have to leave the city limits. We are also going to family camp a couple of weeks after that. My May is filled with 3-day weekends, so I am really looking forward to both May and June.

PP's post reminded me. When we get the tent we will do a backyard trial run. The tent is more for the backyard than anything! We may take it somewhere once or twice a year...

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**We got our internet back. Dh is driving me nuts. Enough said. LOL.

We're just in internet limbo while we decide how to proceed. IT's likely we will switch to phone VOIP/fibre optic internet with a more local company. DOwnside? May have to sign a contract. We don't sign contracts for anything, so it strikes me as odd. But it's a far better deal than most anything else, so why we are considering it. We may break our contract rule (the only other contracts we have are our mortgage and Verizon - we've only been with Verizon for over a decade... So that one seems rather moot as we have never found a better deal for our needs).

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**As our cash grows (if the tide turns anyway...) we will have to consider our cash savings accounts. With, really, little cash to go around, I have been sticking with GMAC Online Savings account. The rate is overall pretty competitive. I have been with them a couple of years, at least, and they seem to be slow to lower rates; fast to raise rates. Win-win. Since our cash has mostly consisted of our emergency fund, this is fine. Plus the fees are $0 and the customer service is eons above most of the other banks offering anything similar. I am extremely particular. I haven't found much to like about many of the other popular high-yield banks.

As our cash grows I do become more concerned about spreading it out a bit. PArticularly with so many banks in trouble. Confident in FDIC, I would just prefer not to lose access to all my cash at once, for a time, if my bank(s) went under.

Yeah, I Was looking at some of the other higher paying banks the other day and didn't find much. One of the more popular ones lately has our mortgage. The customer reviews are atrocious. I thought that one might be convenient, but have had second thoughts.

Along the same lines, we will probably start a CD ladder in the future. We just aren't quite there yet. We may also investigate Treasury bills, etc., etc. We will have much to look into as our cash balance grows. It's hard to "set it and forget it" and really make progress. So these are all things I see in the near future. Things change as circumstances change.

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**I think we may start paying down the mortgage a bit extra. It's the thing I eternally struggle with. I could literally flip a coin most of the time.

If we deposit $1500 to the mortgage around christmas we will literally hit our 10-year home owning anniversary with the same mortgage balance we started with.

Sounds terrible, huh? 10 years and the SAME mortgage!?!

There's much more to it than that. We literally only borrowed $30k in addition to get twice the house (+ LAND!). It's just been slow going with this whole one-income/kid thing. We actually paid $10k off during our first year on our first home. It was a 15-year mortgage. But things change and we spent the last 7 years or so paying off about $20k.

The tide seemed to turn when we were hitting $4k per year in principal. Certainly no $10k per year, but better than the SLOW process we had been making.

Which I guess is the other thing. Simply paying another $1k per year would put us where we left off (paying off old amortization - shaving a few years off the new loan - to where we were).

We were in no hurry to get there because our recent refi no doubt made an earlier mortgage payoff an easier reality. But we have other more important things to take care of in the interim. So we decided.

But yeah, adding another $1k per year is starting to look so simple and psychologically rewarding. (Still paying $1300 less annually than we were with our old higher-interest mortgage. Win-win).

So I am thinking about it. I may flip a coin come January. I'll let you know what I decide then. January 2010 will be our 10-year milestone.

Our mortgage balance has never been below $200k which is a big psychological milestone. That one is kind of exciting too... Give me 3 years...

I have been thinking about it because it seems so many people are home shopping. So here are my observations/advice for potential new home buyers.

**Be careful out there. In the last decade everyone was running out and snatching up houses because "they could never afford to buy a house" if they didn't act fast. As if the double digit appreciation could be sustained forever? I tell you, I never quite *got* that thinking. Though it was a factor on when we bought our first home, it was only because it was well within our means. Since a single detached home was not even in the realm of reasonable we didn't even bother trying. (We moved instead). I have people all the time tell me I don't understand because I own a home. Uh, believe me, I understand what it's like to be priced out of a home market. When that happens, the smart thing to do is to not buy. Not to snatch it up before it gets even more expensive!!! & that is precisely what we did (not buy in the unaffordable market).

I share this because the pendulum has swung so far in the opposite direction, I see much of the same stuff going on. People are stretching into homes they can't afford because they are worried prices and interest rates will never be so low again. The same wisdom stands. I mean really, what is the freaking rush? Buying a home you can't afford because of the "low price" and "low interest rates" is little more than crazy. You have a certain amount of time and power that has not been seen for a long time. Enjoy it!

I just have to roll my eyes when so many people are running out buying houses like the world will end if they don't do it today. Take a deep breath and SLOW DOWN. Enjoy the BUYER'S market, for sure. It's been a long time coming. I have to say I am a wee bit jealous of the opportunity to buy in a buyer's market.

But yeah, to sum it up simply, "It's not a deal if you can't afford it!"

Our first home had an interest rate of 8.25%. It's all relative. My parents' mortgage was in the double digits for a long time (they bought in the 80s during the era of high interest rates). In the 1990s, an 8%+ rate was not the end of the world. It was a "good deal." If nothing else, prices tend to drop as interest rates rise. If you can't afford it, did you ever stop to think no else can either? Stop with the panic already!

**My second point is a bit of a rant as well. Since we moved somewhere a little more inexpensive, and prices rose very rapidly here in the mid 2000s, this is the norm we came across with our friends. & I NEVER understood the thinking at all, because back home owning an apartment was far cheaper than renting. So though I understood on some level, the high desire for home ownership there, I never quite got the whole desperation when we moved somewhere with cheap rent options. I guess what happened is home prices just got so astronomical ($250k homes were selling for $650k within 3 years) that people panicked and decided they could never afford a home if they didn't jump prematurely. As a result, I got a pile of friends renting for pennies, who can't save a dime, taking on $3k/month PITI with $0 down.

I was completely lost as this whole thing unfolded. You don't know how many people told me they simply could not afford to save a DIME for a down payment, but they were taking on these massive house payments, far above what local rents were going for. Huh? & how in the heck can they afford such a massive mortgage payment if they can't save a dime with a $1k monthly rent payment? Have they lost their minds?

The short answer is, "YES!"

It was not sustainable, home prices have tumbled back to 2001 levels, very rapidly, and every single one of those people have lost their homes to foreclosure.

Anyway, being able to save up a significant down payment on a home is by no means the only indicator of the affordability of a house. BUT it is a BIGGIE. Quite simply, if you can't afford to save 20% down, I honestly think you have no business buying said house. Mortgages are expensive. House maintenance is expensive. & if you can't save 20% down, odds are you are going to sink. I know it's an extreme view for this day and age, but it's true. I haven't come across anyone who put 20% down on a home and lost it. Not that it doesn't happen, but it is certainly more rare. & with lower down payments comes the expense of PMI, etc.

Along the same lines, if you can't afford the fixed mortgage rate, you can't afford house. All it becomes is a gamble. One that most people are currently losing. I know there's a couple of people around here with ARMs who can AFFORD IT. No issue there. But if you don't have enough assets to pay off your house if things go horribly wrong, back away from the ARM!

I think this is why I often say any more, "If you can afford to save 20% down you can probably afford the house." It's not a hard and fast rule, but you are doing a million times better than most people who live in my city, which I guess is my point. You stand half a chance to catch the curveballs of home ownership if you are a good saver.

BTW, people need to get real. IT can take YEARS to save up a down payment. & that's how we did it in the olden days. Even though we bought our first home quite young, my dh simply saved most of his wage from age 15-23. That is where most of our down payment came from. Sure we were in a unique position to be able to save so much so young, but if not, we would have waited a few more years to buy a home. No doubt about it.

**So how much house can you afford???

Obviously be wary of the loan products out there and what greedy brokers tell you.

All that being said, be wary of even the hard and fast rules of thumbs. Everyone's situation is so unique.

I was playing with a pile of online calculators, and using the usual hard and fast rules of thumbs, all of the online calculators said I could afford homes that I personally would feel very uncomfortable buying. An "ideal" PITI range for us is $1800 - $2300. Um, no thanks???? (We're at about $1700 today). These were mostly $400k homes. (Dh and I made a commitment to draw the line at $300k home price, when we were 25. Needless to say, as we age, the less we would consider tying up in a house. $400k sounds a little crazy if you ask me. Bought with equity? Perhaps. But I was assuming we used the same 20% down we already had. I was not running these calculators with home equity to spare).

The irony is since I live in California I am probably willing to stretch it a little more than most of the frugalites around here. Which I think says a lot when I feel extremely uncomfortable when a calculator tells me I can afford PITI of 35% of my income. No thanks!

When we were younger and just starting out we stretched more because rents were astronomical (higher than owning) and because we had just started out in well paying careers (both of us). We may have pushed it with 40%. I also know our PITI was higher than 40% (50%+?) when my spouse stopped working. That being said, both situations were extremely temporary. Neither of us had any urging to get in over our head with a house payment. At 30 our PITI is around 25%. That is about as high as I would go any more. (& that is 25% of only one income. We wouldn't increase it simply because dh returned to work). Which reminds me, yeah, I was running all the calculators on my income alone.

Reminds me, I would advise to run the calculators assuming you only live on one income (if you are a dual income family). We certainly bought both our homes when we were both working, with payments we felt we could afford on one income. Boy it would be interesting to run these calculators with a second income. Scary!

Our goal is to lower our PITI with time. We have no plans to upgrade our home, ever, and we are young enough in our careers that we expect our income to grow considerably in the future (though we have already had a lot of income growth in our 20s). Thus if we were just buying a home today for the first time we would play it far more conservatively than we did in our early 20s. In our 40s we would like to have our house paid off. Which basically means I would have little desire to buy anything we couldn't pay cash for, or pay off rapidly, in our 40s. Thus, though we were aggressive on one end of the spectrum, individual circumstances certainly change how we approach things.

& some other food for thought - if you are single - don't push it. You have only yourself to fall back on. We always tried to aim for a house payment WE felt comfortable with on one income. But having a second income to fall back on increased our ability to stretch a bit. I find myself in the forums thinking some people can likely afford more house than the forum gives them credit for. But then I feel like I am just contrary because a single person will come along and everyone gives them a thumbs up. & I just cringe. I could not personally imagine taking on such a large mortgage (standard rules of thumb) if I were single. Little details like that really change the playing field, in my opinion.

It's all food for thought.

& I have to say, I am glad I am "out of the game" so to speak. Buying a house is not an easy decision. It is a decision that needs much more thought than it has been given by most in the last decade. For that, I wish all you new home buyers lots of luck!

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ETA: I was thinking about this because I have a relative in her 60s, single, who just bought a home recently (partially with inheritance). My dad asked me if I thought she should pay it off rapidly (because she is hitting it hard). Considering her age and economic circumstances I told him it wasn't the worst - there is always a reverse mortgage for a case like hers. She pretty much makes minimum wage. She lives in small town Kansas. I mentioned paying off a small mortgage makes sense. I'd be more keen to hit mine harder on the front end if it would be gone in a few short years. Anyway, my dad told me he thought her mortgage balance was $60k-$80k. I simply gasped. O.M.G. I am sure she would look at my $210k mortgage balance and gasp. But I am merely 31, I've already paid off $90k, and I make about 4 times her income. To be fair, my dad merely ventured a guess from her broke status, the cost of the home (known) and the inheritance they received (known). So though he was guessing, I think his guess was reasonable. & all I Could think is, "Yikes!"

Today we have tee ball (we paid our whopping $100 back in January?) For the rest of spring it's "free" entertainment/activity, if you ask me. IT's probably how they suck you in. Make it cheap for tee ball and becomes more expensive as you move up the ranks.

Anyway, the high school is putting on a free play (Aesop's Fables) for little kids, in the afternoon.

The library at the same location is offering free books to kids.

So it sounds like a nice, cheap day.

ETA: Speaking of nickel and diming, dh did go to McDs and the Wifi was $3 (for 2 hours). HE said, "No Thanks!" Too expensive for his blood. Stuck with the libabry until Monday diagnosis... But it is interesting he can sit outside and use the Wifi during off hours. (It's just not the greatest area and I Will consider it a blessing if we still have our laptop come Monday. We usually never take it out of the house so if nothing else it makes me nervous every day he takes it out somewhere. Um, there's a reason you don't usually see people at the playground outside the library with their laptops out!)

Yeah, the thing about McDs is we generally only go there for the playground. willing to make a trip and buy some food to let the kids play or enjoy free wifi. $3 too? Forget it. Won't bother going... As dh said, "I already bought their crappy food... & they want $3 too???"

**Weather is a lovely 67 degrees (inching up to low 70s perhaps).

May that be the last time I go upstairs in April and see the thermostat at 85 degrees! Ugh. We lived AC-free downstairs (thank you energy efficient house) though it was high 90s a couple of days. Of course, can't say so much for the upstairs. We turned the AC on briefly before bed the last few nights to make sleeping bearable... Otherwise it was much like summer. The days can be pretty horrid but the nights are usually cool. So no need to run the AC all night or anything. It was probably a little extra cool at night so the downstairs stayed much more bearable.

**As far as FREEDOM, tax season is winding down and I feel like a giant load is lifted from my shoulders. Rest of the year will be easy peasy at work.

Sad to say, Chase has dropped the WAMU School Savings program so I just got word I don't have to take over next year after all.

As much as that sucks, I feel like I have little responsibility for the rest of the year. So I feel "free" in that regard. I have a tendency to do too much and as long as my kids are young my priorities have changed. I have no inkling to take on a pile of responsibilities. I already have plenty. It's a little different for me, but I am enjoying. The school savings program would have been minimal work, but I am kind of glad not to be in full charge of something. Woohoo.

**Got a surprise refund of $70 from the city. They overcharged on some bonds paid with our property taxes. GREAT! I was annoyed I didn't notice (not sure how I would know though). The interesting thing is since our property is in a living trust, they made the check out to "_____ Family Trust." I am not sure how hard a time our bank will give us with this (depositing a trust check). Depends how trust educated the bank employees are. (There is no difference between a living individual and a living trust - they are one. IT only makes any difference when you die - then the trust becomes a seaparate entity). Yeah, I don't expect much. This could be the catalyst to open a new bank account in the trust's name. We just haven't bothered because we don't have much cash and we haven't opened any new bank accounts since the trust was established.

I have no idea what is involved in converting our current bank accounts - but maybe it's time to find out. I seem to recall our lawyer giving us letters to send to our financial institutions (Example letters anyway). Time to dig them out?

**I don't think my allergies are getting worse, but I am starting to notice what I once thought was illness was probably allergies all along. The area, that we have only lived in a few years has a horrible reputation for allergies. & I definitely suffer every spring. I just realized I get fall and summer allergies too... Dh heard that eating local honey helps with allergies, so he bought a pile of honey from a local outfit. We'll see if it helps. He was sweet and bought me honey from Oakland a while back (Oakland is 2 hours away?) because it was all he could find. Now we have a variety of locally harvested honey.

I do know I am allergic to grass. I am not sure if honey will help me (I am skeptical). Unless dh can find "grass honey." He got like alfalfa and some other kinds of honey...

**The local radio station has been paying people's car payments (up to $1000 by the way) as part of a promotion. Most of the payments end up being $300-$500. But still. I just don't *get* people and their cars.

Plus I am kind of bummed I don't qualify since I don't have a car payment. I'll take a house payment? (They ran that promo in the past - I think they've certainly gone cheaper in the economy).

**How could I forget? Still no internet. Dh called ATT 100 times and they upped their day to come out to Monday from Wednesday. Still at least one full week without internet, at the least. Assuming they can resolve it Monday even.

I've adjusted remarkably well to no internet at home, though I spent a couple of lunch breaks manning dh's ebay auctions. & the truth is I have internet at work. Coming in Saturday doesn't seem so bad this week either. That being said, I usually do most of my internet time at home. So it is surprising how little I have missed it. & why my blog has been quiet!

Dh has also done amazingly well. He found if he takes the kids to the playground behind the library before the library opens, he can download things for later, and catch up on e-mails. Library wifi. We also found out the McDonalds by the kids' old preschool has wifi. Thank goodness for the laptop. (When the library is open the wifi connection is slow - too many to share with I guess).

I am fed up with ATT. I am done. There is no excuse. Dh wants to wait and search out other options once he has more internet time. HE called Surewest about Fibre Optic and they said it would take 10 days to hook up. If it took less than a week I think we would have signed up. But for now we will wait and peruse our options. We haven't been happy with Dish either so we may peruse cable options again. Dh has some research to do.

I don't know how many times I have stayed away from a company that has a reputation for not coming through when things go bad (or like when you need anything). So, the second ATT said they couldn't help us for 10 days I Was out. That's just crazy. On the flip side, we don't seem to have a lot of options. *sigh*

Well, hope everyone has a nice weekend!

Blech.

The weather is atrocious. Though I hear it is even worse in So Cal.

Today is s'posed to be something like 95 and then it will cool down.

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I finally saw the final sales price on our latest foreclosure. It was priced low and sold in a flash. & it was bid up. To $226k. We are back to the prices when we moved in. 2001. But I think the whole selling in a flash and being bid up thing is a good sign. Prices are still falling, but priced right we could sell our house in just days (for more than we paid even).

All that being said, as prices inch down you can't help but wonder how low they will go.

I read median price in region fell to $160k. I know the locals think the median price will fall to $100k but I think honestly they are crazy. I think it is possible it may bottom out there for a short time, but I don't think $100k home prices will become the norm.

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I read an interesting article the other day that living trusts are imperative if you live in California, but not really necessary in places like Texas. Basically, it depends where you live. Article writer recommended just about everyone in California have a living tust (excepting young and single with no assets, etc., where it makes little sense).

My personal experience, in California, is that probate is a complete nightmare. IT is expensive. & it is time consuming. For our clients with trusts it is easy as a breeze, and for those without living trusts, even just following out the wishes of a will, can take years. Even for those with little in assets, it can be quite costly. & the truth is the lawyers do get paid more if you don't have a living trust.

So I cringe when I come across well meaning frugalites who wouldn't touch a living trust with a 10-foot pole. Talk about penny wise and pound foolish. So I shared this for that reason. To the rest of you, maybe you are right. But if you live in California, it's a good thing to have. I always tell people the expense is more often emotional than anything else. Most of our clients are dealing with the death of their parents. Having to deal with the courts and probate and everything is emotionally exhausting. HAving a living trust greatly simplifies things. I think that is the best part about it. There is definitely money saved, but that is honestly just a small piece of it. It seems like every year I have someone sitting across from me telling me the nightmares of California probate. I haven't been through probate personally, but I have heard enough to know it is something to avoid. I am also relieved our parents have living trusts because we have been appointed as their trustees.

No one executing a living trust has sat across from me, poured out their heart and cried during their entire appointment. That's all I know! IT seems with a trust it is easier to get on with your life. But, my only caveat is if you have someone you can trust. Probate is good if you have quibbling beneficiaries. Everything goes through the court process and I see how that could be better than a trustee who may not follow your wishes. IT does happen.

It just occured to me all the vacations that are coming up in the next year, for us.

10-year anniversary from college grad is next month. Holy cow!!!! Where did the time go?

Which means we are coming up on 10 years of home ownership (January) and 10 years of marriage (Fall 2010).

Anyway, before I continue I just had to say I just put a lengthy comment on someone's blog about why I do not particularly care for traveling. But there is ONE exception to this rule. Hawaii! I LOVE Hawaii.

(I am sitting here pondering this and I think I get a glimpse into my psychology. I am simply not extremely adventurous. If I find something I like, I stick with it. I am not going to waste a lot of money going to somewhere I have never been and not liking it. Maybe that is some of it).

So yeah, though I have no travel goals in particular, in the back of my head I have made a mental note that we should go to Hawaii if we can score a good airfare deal (not that hard from the west coast). So I perused ticket prices around April 15th, as I daydreamed about what to do with tax season being over. & I did find decent tickets!

But next year we can probably get a free condo (relative timeshare - it's being used this year).

& it occured to me next year is our anniversary!!!!!

OF course I rather go in May. May will be our 15-year anniversary of actually meeting, so even better. I'd go in May anyway, but makes it nice May is also an important anniversary. I won't say 10 years of marriage have gone fast because I met my spouse at age 18 and hardly remember life without him. It feels like I have known him an eternity. It's weird to think we have only been married 10 years actually.

Going to Hawaii is not set in stone, but something we are considering. I think we can squeak out a nice trip in the $1k range (if the room is free). I've never been to Kaui though dh had been many times. But that is where I Want to go.

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BTW I had to say DisneySteve completely and totally jinxed me today. (Or made me jinx myself). Gee, thanks. LOL.

He had a thread about his unreliable DSL. I said ours has NEVER had a problem (because it hasn't) although our cable (for most of the last 7 years) was another story. We've maybe had our current DSL setup for 8 months? (We had it 2 years in our old condo as well - without a problem).

So anyway, dh calls me today to tell me internet went out last night and has been out all day. DSL!

When he called ATT they said it was our problem, not theirs. That everything is fine. Dh is pretty technically savvy and so we both find this hard to believe.

Better yet, they can't send someone out until NEXT WEEK!!!!!!

Are you flipping kidding me?

Next wednesday, and dh badgered them until he got a date for NEXT Monday. Ugh. My dh doesn't generally take no for an answer, so it's maddening how little progress he was making with them.

In the meantime, dh has an online conference call tonight for a video project, he has all his project stuff online (script program or something) and he is in the midst of ebay and craigslist sales. There is the library, but he has kids to cart around too. At home he can occupy them more easily while he does his web work.

I hadn't really thought about it, but yeah, he can't really function. SO naturally he is pretty pissed.

I told him if that's the case I think we should just drop ATT. I asked what our options were. He said fibre optic or cable. We are boycotting Comcast, which leaves Surewest (they don't service cable at out house, but have fibre optic).

Since we have been having a really good year and I Realize how much of dh's income and productivity relies on the internet, I told him if he can get Surewest to hook up fibre optic this week I am in. Even if the internet is $50 per month (double what we pay now), whatever. We dropped a whole bunch of cable and phone stuff this year. With my income boost it seems like a decent splurge. I looked up the prices while we were chatting.

So he is looking into it. I think he is hesitant to spend so much, which is fair enough. But I could really care less about keeping ATT at this point. We would ideally prefer Surewest cable, if they ever offer it to us. But that is a sticking point.

It's hard to search out options without internet. IT's hard to do ANYTHING without the internet. At least I can keep an eye on the ebay stuff from work. Phew.

**We are having a heat wave. Ugh. I kept feeling like I should get out the spring clothes and do the seasonal shuffle (pull out BM's old clothes and see what fits LM, etc. Then figure out what we need to buy new for BM). But the weather keeps going back and forth between a warming trend, and then unusual cold. Any time I commit to do the shuffle, it gets cold again.

BUT yesterday was 85 degrees. Doesn't sound horrid but the house has gotten awfully warm. I think we will be lucky not to turn on the AC in April. The house got up to 78 yesterday. (We usually turn the AC on 78 - 80). It's supposed to be in the 90s for a couple of days. Ugh. Definitely time to do the shuffle.

As an aside, a friend of mine gave me a bunch of hand-me-downs for LM, but most of the shirts were more BM's size. Since he grows up and not out, for the most part, I expect all his shorts from last season to still fit. I may not have to buy much of anything for the warm weather. Now that I have a pile of bigger shirts for him. Yahoo! & LM can enjoy a little more variety to his wardrobe than BM's hand-me-downs. The only thing I really envision buying is sandals for the kids.

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**Yesterday was not totally simple. We did take my parents out to lunch (they came up to see BM's tee ball game). The weather was actually absolutely perfect for the morning game. We lucked out there. & lunch was quite a splurge.

But the rest of the day was rather simple. We played card games most of the day and the kids played outside in the afternoon - at first digging for bugs and later we turned on the sprinklers for them. For dinner I asked my mom to help me with one of her recipes I never quite figured out. She had showed me once before, but we tried again. I think I got the hang of it now. Overall it was a simple meatball recipe. The copy I had of the recipe had different instructions though. Could be part of the problem!

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**I picked up the house a bit Friday and it wasn't so bad. It won't win any awards, but it is much better. Phew. I realized maybe keeping up a little more had helped. There is so much more time these days for that kind of stuff. Phew. What seems like an impossible task with infants under foot is so much more manageable these days. It's not just the time. It's the fact we can all pitch in and accomplish as much work in like half the time.

I think I am just going to sit back the rest of April and recover. BUT I do have some things to sell on Craigslist and some chores around the house to get to. Many listed in my sidebar. I will probably start tackling those soon. Seems like perfect spring work (spring cleaning).

Reminds me, I decided not to go to work this weekend after all. I am excited about that. There is a chance I may have to go in next weekend, but I think I will feel much more refreshed for the busy week ahead.

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Oh yeah, and I updated my sidebar. Almost forgot to mention that. The thing about goals is that they are ever evolving. My cash savings goal will probably be met in June, so I revised it a bit. I added $2k to my cash savings goal and $1k to my ROTH savings goal, for 2009.

If Life's success is measured whether you need an alarm clock or not, then consider me successful! Teehee. I just have to roll my eyes at the constant mantra that the best thing about retirement is not setting an alarm clock. How about not setting an alarm clock the decades before you retire? Even better! (I am sure alarm clocks will take over our life a little more when the kids are older. But anyway, I am a morning person, I don't use alarm clocks. No one in my family does at present...)

It's just one of those things that bugs me. Maybe this is why I do not mind employment, AT ALL. Being a morning person helps. & not being worked to death (& thus not being so exhausted to need an alarm clock to wake up).

But it's more than that - we try to keep life simple.

I know it's symbolic more than anything - but yeah - a lot of the times I just don't understand the psychology of people who want to retire super early. I am just not wired that way. So I read the alarm clock thing and think people sure seem to go through a lot of unnecessary effort to not need an alarm clock.

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Today I was lazy and decided to treat myself to lunch. In fact, I decided to go to Togo's. It had been ages and I figured I wanted to keep them in business. (Not that I would succeed, but I should try).

I went over there and in the past I would get the whole meal thing. I decided I didn't need the calories so skipped the whole chip/meal thing. I decided to get a soda though since I just didn't have any. I cringed at the $1.50 or so price. I so often just keep soda at work, but was caught unprepared.

So I ordered my sandwhich and soda, and probably froze in shock when they told me the price was $7.70.

Um, okay?

I guess their prices have gone up in the last few years... YEesh.

I did notice my favorite sandwhich is on special on Monday. Yes, I will remember that!

The new sales tax does not help, I am sure.

I wondered if the meal was a better deal and if I should have just gotten the chips, as I left. I grabbed a menu. The prices were all higher than I remembered and I no longer saw the sandwhich/chip/soda deal, though they had others.

I hadn't frequented there since pre-kid really. So I wonder how much is rising prices and how much is I am just not used to forking over $8 for a LUNCH.

The only plus side is, as usual, I ate half my sandwich, and saved half for later.

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As I sat here typing I heard the gardener outside trimming our bushes. That makes me happy as a clam. You don't know how much I hate yard work. Worth every penny. I am just sitting here marveling at how nice the yard must look and how I didn't have to lift a finger. Which is good because I actually have some serious housework to do. Housework I don't particularly mind. But yeah, the house looks like a tornado hit it, and we have guests this weekend. So I better go make a dent.

Don't get me wrong. I don't love housework. I am not a fan. But since I don't hate it with a passion, I Can do it myself. Hehe. Plus if I let it slide for months while work is crazy, I don't get angry letters in my mail box. That could be more to the point. The neighbors don't have to know what slobs we are.

I am actually kind of bummed because the house did look great a few weeks ago and I was thinking maybe with the kids getting older I could be more on top of things. & then this happened. I don't know what the heck happened really. This is why I do not do much housework. It feels so futile most of the time. It's nice for 5 minutes and then we seem to be back to square one.

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It will be nice to have a neater house and I look forward to a mostly relaxing weekend. Though I will probably work a few hours, but much less than I have been. & I think this is my last weekend working all year. Woohoo!

More income means business to take care of.

I posted yesterday I received a nice bonus. The amount was somewhat unexpected.

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I decided to run my tax numbers again for the year. I was aiming for rather breakeven before the extra income kicked in. I plugged my numbers in our tax planning software and it wasn't good. Not only would we owe over $1k, but I was in AMT! HUH? I knew dh returning to work could push us into AMT, but not a flipping $5k raise. I finally decided that the AMT calcs were wrong - the software had not been updated for more recent tax law changes. I also did not see the Making work pay credit. So I took out the AMT and deducted $800 for the credit. This left us with a $500 refund from the Feds and $500 due to the state, estimated. Good enough for me. I am punishing the state, so that works (hell if I will take a refund from them - they won't pay it anyway).

I was rather pleased with this scenario. I assumed we had no medical expenses this year (beyond insurance/regular checkups) and that we gave nothing to charity, etc., etc. Odds are we will have more deductions. Dh's (ebay) income should be offset by the dependent care credit. So overall, I am happy with this. & we have a little extra cash in the bank if I screwed up my calculations.

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Lest you think I am all work and no play (harldy!), we actually went out on a nice dinner April 15th to celebrate the end of "tax" season and told my parents we would take them out to lunch Sunday. But we can fit this all out of our budget - why we just saved the whole bonus. All this was done and put into motion before the actual bonus arrived.

Reminds me, there is an excellent, albeit a little pricey, Indian cafe in our neighborhood. There is never many people there and it is rather small. We went there Wednesday and it was PACKED. I think that is a wonderful sign. We took dh's friends out to eat on a weeknight when they were here and our other favorite place was just jam packed. IT always is on weekends but it gets so quiet around here during the week any more. I don't know if it's a fluke or what. The food is excellent so I am glad they are doing well.

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It looked like our net worth was up considerably; higher than it has ever been (barely). So I looked at that today. Net worth today was $213k. We hit $212k late in mid 2008. So it's nice to move forward. But barely. Still pretty much at the whim of the stock market. But I do feel like we can make forward progress this year.

Our cash/investment assets are not quite at six figures yet. The rest of our equity is in our house - mostly what we paid off as the value still holds rather steady slightly above what we paid.

Most of that is rather up in the air. (Stock market and home values).

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CASH

We have always saved up a lot of cash. We wanted to put at least 20% down on our home. We wanted to have plenty of cash to supplement my income when dh stopped working, etc. & moving forward we would like to continue to pay cash for everything and to increase our "emergency" cash savings. I think 3 months' expenses suffice for our situation today, but I think this money should always be growing (interest, if nothing else).

Anyway, in the past decade we have mostly been ridiculed as far too conservative (and not investing every spare dime in the stock market). So it's been kind of interesting to read a multitude of articles lately about how cash is IN. Suze no longer thinks you can afford anything until you have 8 months expenses in the bank, etc. Basically, our thinking all along is becoming rather in vogue. & yes, I think it's little more than a trend.

I mentioned briefly in my last post that our goal was $30k cash in the bank. This actually does work out to about 8 months of living expenses. Suze would be pleased. The number mostly comes from the fact that we have hardly ever had less cash as adults. Having our second child changed things a bit. So it's where we want to get back to as kind of a minimum. & of course we would continue to grow our cash savings from there. But 8 months of living expenses is a nice goal. To start. I think our personal goal is more like a year, and growing.

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Finally, as I look at my compensation for the year I realize we are officially back to more of a 2-income level. I never expected to make so much on my income alone, so rapidly. Inflation has eaten at our earnings power over the last few years, but our income taxes have also decreased quite dramatically. I look forward as a result, to rapid savings going forward. In fact, I expect we can possibly do better than before because we are managing our assets better.

I at least know we can get through the next year. Once LM starts school next summer, dh and I will probably sit down and discuss our future more. Right now he is working on some film projects, trying to get them off the ground with his limited spare time. If things continue like this I wouldn't mind him taking a year or 2 to work on that stuff, when he actually has some considerable free time. (& the kids will still need him much). But from there, as the kids get older, he will probably return to school and/or seek employment to help move us along. Though we may be in a spot we won't need his income, it doesn't mean he doesn't want to grow professionally or build up his skills so he has more to fall back on if something happens to me. So yeah, we will have a LOT to figure out.

I am pleased that our current path will probably buy us a little more time to figure this all out. I have the feeling his main job will be staying home the first couple of years LM is in school. Though going back to college during those years may be a wise move. In our current position I don't mind giving him a solid year or 2 to work on his DREAM further. One would argue he has had almost 7 years to do so. But being in full charge of 2 wee little ones, and me making too little to pay for childcare most of that time, has meant I wouldn't exactly see it fair to say, "You had some time and you didn't make it." The elementary school years seem okay for that time - time to try to make it and prove he can make any money with his hobbies. Dh is still young enough that he has time...

I saw this article and it seemed rather fitting on a day like today.

What I Learned in My 16 Years on the Tax Beat

http://list.calcpa.org/t/26295/12258596/12778/0/


HAppy Tax Day!

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I've said before, taxes are NOT our bread and butter. So, I am not going on vacation, or anything of that nature. I am a month or 2 behind on all of my usual work. THat's what I will be working on the next few weeks - just simply catching up.

Though I guess it is a wee bit of a sigh of relief. April 30th will be far better. We have payroll tax returns and personal property tax returns to crank out the next 2 weeks though. May 1 will be my deadline reprieve and I do look forward that...

It happens ever year. All my friends call me and everyone wants to go party. & it's like, "Can you get back to me in 2 weeks?" It's not like I have worked here for 8 years or anything... People just latch on to that whole April 15th thing...

I changed our retirement contributions around.

I made my last 2008 contribution on Monday. We maxed out 2007 due to a windfall but didn't even bother trying in 2008. But I always put as much as I can into the prior year. So if we were to have another windfall, or dh were to return to work, we don't let go of ROTH contributions foolishly.

Anyway, since January I have been contributing $350 per month to MY ROTH simply because it was the only financial institution I Could figure out how to make 2008 contributions to automatically, during 2009.

Dh and I view our retirement (As everything else) merely as "one." That being said, he does not work and I have a pretty awesome retirement plan at work. The only downside, and it is a big one, is that if something happens to me, dh only gets something like 50%. I didn't even necessarily realize this until rather recently when I updated my paperwork to add my children as secondary beneficiaries.

Anyway, so between those 2 factors, I think it is a priority to plump up his ROTH. I will probably get $8k in my work plan this year. We will probably only put $4k-$5k into the ROTHs. Seems fair that it should go to him. (In the meantime, life insurance makes up for this unfortunate fact).

That being said, my boss will retire in a few years and I can roll my work retirement into an IRA. So this is certainly not the situation forever.

I am contributing $50/month, going forward, to my ROTH. Just to keep it rolling. I am contributing $300/month to dh's ROTH starting in May. I just set it all up for automatic contributions. Since the last couple of years we have only been contributing around $100/month max, we have stuck to the "retirement funds" and "Total stock indexes." As I changed things around my $50 continues to go to a "retirement fund" and dh's contributions are 50% total stock index/ 25% international index / 25% balanced fund. We haven't bought much international since the market dropped, so it's good to jump back in at lower prices.

I read something the other day like those Retirement funds are risky. Some are down 50%! Well, sure, if you just contributed once, at the peak, and never looked back. Dollar cost averaging significantly smooths those bumps. My "retirement fund" is down 20% today. I have contributed every month since mid 2007. I became a fan of dollar cost averaging when I had my 401k at my last job. It REALLY helps when the market slides anyway. We've unfortunately contributed most of our retirement monies in 2000-2001 and 2007-2008. Great! Right before the busts. But the dollar cost averaging makes it manageable. The losses are significantly muted. Being able to continue to contribute while the market is in the toilet, does pay off in the long run. WE are literally about breakeven - the balance in our retirement today reflect the initial contributions we have put in the last decade. Which kind of sucks that we don't have gains - but happy to say we truly have not "lost" much.

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This year has been good to us. We met our 15% gross to retirement and 10% gross to cash savings goals in one fell swoop. I was hoping to meet these goals when LM garduated preschool. Our home refinance and his unplanned switch to a much cheaper school has made these possible about 18 months of schedule.

So I have been stepping back and looking at our startegy. My goals are clear. The best way to achieve them are not.

Maxing out the ROTH (basically, maxing out a second one) is clearly a priority. WE are still in a virtually zero tax bracket and we would be crazy not to take advantage.

Other goals are to save for college and to pay down the mortgage ahead of schedule. I will put up with a mortgage that is reasonable and cheaper than renting, in the short term. In the long run we are extremely debt adverse and want it paid off well before retirement.

I am worried about affording our health care, as usual. But besides those types of expected expense increases there is not a lot on the horizon. WE are very content with our "Wants" spending at present. I know dh wants more gadgets and we talk about more grand vacations when the children are older. But those things can wait for a second income or a big raise. In the meantime we are quite content. The nice thing for our wants wish list is most of them are one time expenses. Nothing we necessarily need a permanently increased income for.

I have personally been tempted to stop or greatly reduce ROTH contributions just long enough to get our cash savings up to snuff. It is TEMPTING!!!!!! IF we had $30k in the bank I think our current $5k annual cash contributions would suffice. But with the market in such a tizzy, dh and I decided to continue the ROTH contributions as is. We are instead nearing $20k in the bank, and so have a decent amount of cathing up to do. But for now we are optimistic we can max out one ROTH and get our savings up to snuff in the next year or 2.

As far as maxing out the second ROTH? If we can avoid using our medical deductible, we can max out a second ROTH, maybe in 2010. We could contribute that money to a HSA but I like HSAs about as much as 529s. Lots of fees and little flexibility. Which leaves me of the opinion that HSAs and 529s will be our friend when my spouse returns to work and we have more savings than we know what to do with (& when our income tax rates are higher). In the meantime? Not ready to contribute to a HSA or a 529. They make little sense for people in our situation.

Which leads me to thoughts on college. No one in my family has spent much on college, and prices are still quite reasonable in California. In fact, my parents did not save a dime of money for me for college and since dh's parents are huge college money gifters, my kids have about as much money as my entire college education cost (a whopping $10k) at age 3 & 5. IT's not something I particularly sweat, and is another reason I would not save TONS in a 529. BEcause you get penalized on the money that is not used for college.

I have been thinking about it and maxing out our ROTH would put us about 25% contributions to retirement. Clearly more than necessary (we have always put away 10% - 15%, since we graduated college). As long as we are in this position I have decided not to contribute more money to the kids. The one exception is I may contribute a little more so I Can diversify their funds a bit more. (Since every fund needs a certain minimum). Aside from that, the ROTHs will become triple purposed. They hold some of our cash emergency fund, they hold a decent amount of our true retirement funds, and now they will hold a decent amount of investments for college in the offchance our kids "must" go to Stanford or something along those lines. In the meantime, truth is, their college will probably be paid for by the grandparents anyway. So even if dh returned to work, not sure we would go the 529 route... I view it more as contributing to retirement, but I can still sleep well at night if I am REALLY wrong about the whole college thing.

Which means simply, after thinking about it, the only true goal we have once our retirement vehicles are maxed, is to pay off the house.

Dh's income literally went about 100% to our house when he worked (down payment). & I think we will resume this plan when/if he returns to work. Literally, take his paycheck and pay down the house. It's amazing to me what a huge difference a mere $5k a year in income could make. That would be quite a dent. But yes, I think we have come full circle.

I tend to be extremely idealistic so we shall see. One thing at a time...

I just wanted to share my thinking with my current goals. They always seem to be evolving as circumstances change.

I am breathing a little sigh of relief today. I think tax season madness is DONE. Knock on wood though. It will still be pretty busy here another couple of weeks. May is filled with 3-day weekends for me. I probably will have no idea what to do with myself.

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I don't have anything exciting to chat about. It's been work work work. I've actually had a decent amount of computer time. It's just I have nothing interesting to report. Not that I ever do! Hehe. But I definitely feel dry for blogging ideas. My brain has been maxed out on work. So this will have to be a DH Edition.

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Dh happened to notice, lord knows why, that he had a March 2008 registration expiration sticker on his car. Doh. He called the DMV and they said they sent it (2009) to us a month ago. IDeally we shouldn't get a ticket. I am avoiding his car like the plague though. It's just no fun to get pulled over, even if you know why.

They said they would sent it out ASAP. I figure they will both arrive at the same time. IT is not unusual for things to take 30 days from postmark date to our mailbox. This is why I do not use standard mail much at all any more. We joked about how much our second sticker will be worth on the black market. Assuming we get two eventually. I have literally never had anything "lost" in the mail so I assume it will come. IT's just, lord knows when. I've had quite a few things that should take a day end up taking 30 days to arrive.

Dh was worried he would have to go down to the DMV and started researching options. He learned one of the closer ones to our house, but a bit out of the way, boasted a 0 minute wait most of yesterday when he was researching. Now we know where to go. I've been to the crowded "downtown" once twice. I just never thought to look elsewhere (apparently no one does either).

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If Dh was a superhero he would be Super Advertised PRice Man. LOL. He got into quite an argument at Blockbuster a while ago about their unclear game rental prices advertised on the wall. IT sounded like a riot almost ensued, but my dh is NOT one to back down. (All I can say was I glad I wasn't there). It was literally like over $2. But hell if he will get screwed out of $2.

Anyway, last night when I got home he told me he was fuming about something and would tell me later. Later he handed me a Fry's ad and asked me what I thought about it. It said something along the lines 50% off games. Regular price $30. 1/2 price $15. I could figure where he was going with this so I studied it pretty hard and told him it looked plain as day like games were 50% off. (I guess GAMES is the running theme here).

He went over to Fry's and they told him that was not what the ad said. Above that part of the ad (completely sectioned off) it said buy a DS for $170 and it said something about games with an asterik. If you look below in a box that does not look related in any way shape or form it mentions the half-priced games and apparently has an asterik (so small it looks like a dot) that goes along with the asterik way above it in a different square.

This really peeved my dh. He said, "I don't think so. This is not a clear ad. I want this game at the ADVERTISED PRICE." Dh shops Fry's all the time and in the past they have honored ad mistakes, etc. Instead I guess they were real pricks. He said some extremely condescending managers pointed out how he didn't know how to read ads and somewhat of a row ensued. (I am laughing as he tells me this. BEcause we are couponers. We KNOW how to read ads). It culminated in him realizing that he would get nowhere and so he left and wrote a "nice" e-mail to the store higher ups.

Anyway, on a whim he did decide to take the ad over to Best Buy and they honored it, as a price match, without a blink. Dh really didn't think it would fly. I think he said he called first and they said they honor adds but that one would be below cost so they couldn't honor it. He tried anyway. IT pays to be persistent I guess.

As for me? Honestly, I am not a pushy person and I would have just let it go. He may have saved $15, but he probably wouldn't have spent that money otherwise, and I can just imagine his blood pressure boiling in that whole situation. I'd say it just isn't worth it. IT's worth it to ask. Even to complain to a higher up. But arguing with idiotic sales clerks on power trips? Ugh. Seems pretty futile. Unfortunately it seems to be common any more. It's just odd that this is like the second time this year. Maybe businesses are trying to hold on tighter to every dime any more - I don't know. So are consumers. Maybe that is also part of the problem.

The weather here is a little manic depressive. I was shivering upstairs when I got dressed this morning. Yeesh. It was just freezing. I was tempted to put on the heat, to say the least (it's probably been weeks). Anyway, I decided I would wait and see - I was leaving for work anyway - I'd see how it was later. It was like 66 degrees, but a COLD 66. The kids and hub were no doubt enjoying it (they like it cold - they are weird).

Glad I waited. I took a shower around 3 and it was still chilly, but then we went outside for a walk. It was gorgeous and the kids talked me into turning on the sprinklers and letting them play in the water. We had quite a bit of rain the last few weeks and I hadn't turned on the sprinklers since, so I figured it wasn't the worst to get the grass wet and feed the trees, etc. It just occurred to me maybe it's been a couple of weeks. Amazing how green the lawn looked with all the neglect.

The kids are having a blast. Spring has definitely arrived. (I logged online to cash in my $250 reward check - Chase). I actually came to this site to look at my weather thing since I couldn't find a current reading anywhere else).

Inside the house is only 69 degrees, because the night was so chilly. It's probably still colder upstairs. But I am opening up the windows and trying to let some sun in. It feels nice!

Aaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh. I am refreshed as I can be, the week before April 15th.

Yesterday was uplifting. We did decide to go out to dinner. I wanted to go to Cheesecake Factory since we were right there, but the line was OUT THE DOOR. We had only braved it once - a weeknight in December - but we were like the only people there. Of course, as recently as last week we notice no one goes out week nights any more. Which is kind of odd. So peeved as I was that we couldn't eat there, & that I wasn't going to wait an hour for dinner (would cost an extra $12 in childcare) I do admit it was nice to see so many people out spending their money. We saw a lot of limos to boot. Some people were out splurging!

You could say the same for our second choice. We eventually ended up at a slow restaurant next to a HOPPING brewery restaurant.

Along the same lines, everyone I know who has lost their job has found better, higher paying jobs. So the news is uplifting around here, so far.

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But yes, I typed yesterday that our weekend was so filled with work that it could be an easy No Spend Weekend. But though we couldn't go to the matinee I just wanted nothing more than to go to the movies as we originally planned. We decided to make it spendy.

It was fun because we went to an older movie theater and dh commented, "I think this is one of the older movie theaters in the area. I have never been here." I said, "Well if you haven't been here - don't think I have either." He goes to the movies far more than I. IT is at the mall. The funny thing is the place had a million signs about not admitting people under 17 to R-rated movies. I laughed when we walked inside and I had deja vu. I said - "I have been here - they are really strict with that 17 and under thing." Dh was like, "Were you here with a kid?" I look young but haven't been mistaken for 16 for a while. I said, "No. We came here in college once and they almost wouldn't let me in because I didn't have my ID - they thought I was under 17." I think since all my friends were in their 20s they gave me the benefit of the doubt in the end. LOL. It was just funny - brought back some college memories. Don't ever remember being carded at a movie theater otherwise. We didn't live here but some of my friends went to college in the area and is part of the reason I was happy to choose this area as our low cost of living haven. I knew the area somewhat; had spent a lot of time around here.

Anyway - movies $20. We couldn't swing the matinee this time. Babysitting $35. Dinner $35. Makes for a $90 date. Oh yeah, why we don't do that very often. It was nice to get a break though. AND to get OUT of the house. I just needed a break from the routine.

The drop-in childcare place was not hopping as I had seen it on a Saturday. They had a "free registration" sign up. I hope they can hang in there - not sure what we would do without them. The place appeals to us much more than searching out someone we trust with both our children and our home. All the good people are always booked solid anyway, so lord I hope this place stays in business. At least there were people there.

They messed up the bill last time and dh caught it so they had given him a full hours' credit (more money than the mistake - but all they could do with their system). We also had a 10% coupon. 3.7 hours would have cost about $52 otherwise. But we spent $35. Kind of why we decided to go to dinner after all. Since we had an hour credit. Usually it's hard to justify more than 2 hours of babysitting.

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Today the limitations of my cheap gym are getting to me. Was thinking of going to gym at 7, before work. But they don't open until 8. Dh is "working" rest of day but the gym daycare is closed on Sunday. Figures. I will probably be able to sneak in before lunch, but would have just preferred to go to the gym before work.

I'll get over it. Can't beat the cost.

I am not sure I made it to the gym or aerobics at all last week. *sigh* I have done good most of the year, but off the wagon last week. We will see about next week. After April 15th I do intend to hit it all full force again.