Monkey Mama*s Monkey Money Blog

Meatloaf recipe:

https://www.tasteofhome.com/recipes/mini-meat-loaves-with-ch...

It was easy to find online. Phew!

My initial feelings on lockdown, posted over a month ago:
I am just so buried at work, life continues on as it has. We are homebodies and try to generally limit unnecessary errands, always eat our meals at home, etc. so it's been a small change for us at this point.

I only leave the house to go to the office. MH only leaves the house to go to the grocery store.

At 8 weeks of lockdown, I'd say not much has changed for us. One-income living has prepared us for "quarantine life". I am still buried at work. MH and the kids have their slow "summer schedule" (no school/work). It's all in some realm of normalcy for us.

{This was true through the end of April. Now MM and MH are both working, more info below}.

I commented in another blog that we aren't experiencing any +/- in our spending. A lot of it is having a bare bones budget to begin with. We are clearly using a lot less cell data (on wifi 100% now) but that might save us $4 this month ($1 per line). My commute has decreased a little bit, so my electric fuel spending might be $20 instead of $25. It's just stuff like that.

I am waiting for several windfalls, none have materialized yet: refi, stimulus, unemployment. Crickets, crickets, crickets.

Except for one surprise "windfall". My boss called me up a few weeks ago and offered MM(16) a job. He received a 50% raise (over last summer) and it sounded like he was about to offer him use of a car, we are so desperate for help at the office. That was a sudden turn of events. The night before we had literally discussed how MM probably wouldn't be working at all this year. (The seasonal summer job he had gotten would have started yesterday, but is on hold indefinitely. We had discussed that even if they do open it wouldn't be worth being exposed to hundreds of people every day. Going to the same office I go to, with a whole whopping 5 other people... Talk about night and day).

I am still digging out of my hole. It's a million times better than it ever was in 2018 or 2019, I am very well aware. But last last weekend I was catching up on taxes (for relatives) and this past weekend I finished up my professional education for the (entire) year. Phew!

By itself, I may literally have crossed everything (non-work) off of my to-do list and can maybe realistically experience a May with "nothing on my plate." {I know a lot of people are home and bored. It's just not anything I can even begin to fathom right now; have not been able to fathom "boredom" for a few years}.

But... MH has been called back to work. From part-time to full-time. He hasn't worked full-time since 2002 (before kids). Ugh! It's very in line with my current years-long jinx. Every time I think I turn a corner, something else crazy is thrown at my feet. So technically last Sunday was my first peaceful/quiet day in as long as I can even remember. But then... I was thrown head first into the domestic side of things. But I think it will be a good thing. It's always good to walk in someone's shoes for a while. It should just be for a month. Whenever I try to help at all, MH refuses. & he's already a control freak in the kitchen so just isn't good with delegating anything "kitchen" to anyone. He admits it will be good to get out of his comfort zone and this will force us to have more teamwork in the kitchen, regarding both dishes and meals. We are mostly delegating to DL(14) who literally has nothing on his plate. The schedule and responsibility would obviously be good for him; he's already told us he feels better than he has in weeks. (We've given the kids full kitchen duty in the past, but it's just never stuck).

Thursday night I did make our favorite spinach manicotti recipe. We couldn't find any manicotti, so turned it into a lasagna instead. MH was nervous about it and hovering over me in the kitchen. I agreed to cook because DL(14) does not like this dinner. We asked him to make rice for leftovers, as his chore for the day. Anyway, I could tell the lasagna had cooked through and was fine, but MH was driving me crazy. Honestly, it was a much simpler way to make it. MH might prefer the manicotti, but I think I am sold on the lasagna. It will be interesting what meal modifications endure this time. I think we are long practiced in "creativity" and "making do", but are just flexing those muscles more than usual.

Week 1 went really well. It was definitely a team effort.

Last Sunday MH did a big grocery run for 2-3 weeks. He is being protective and refuses to let anyone else in the house go to any store whatsoever. So his plan was just to do a big grocery stock-up before he was back at work and super busy. We probably hadn't gone to the grocery store on a weekend in a couple of months. Things have settled down considerably. We were able (for the first time) to find more than a roll of toilet paper.

{I think we honestly have food for a solid 3 weeks, not counting "emergency reserves" like extra meat and rice. It feels we barely put a dent in the groceries this week}.

In the end, we realized that all the green onions we had, had gone bad. So we already need green onions though clearly we could survive without. But MH didn't really have room on his grocery cart to stock up on more cat food, and he got me some stuff for a recipe (that I found recently) but didn't know I needed tomato paste. & I later remembered a couple of other recipe ingredients I had forgotten. So... On a whim Friday I looked if I could do a grocery pick up. MH was talking about doing a run to get these things. Which is confusing to me because he's been so much otherwise, "Once every two weeks at the most, JUST ME." So it's confusing to me when he's kind of, "Oh well, will go to the store just to pick up green onions". So I ran it past him Friday and asked if he needed anything else. I just did a quick pickup; they delivered to my car. (I have more work flexibility, so it fell on me). The personal shoppers are free at our store (and they don't accept tips). For smaller orders it isn't free, but I guess the first 3 times are free. I think this is more of a "MH is working and it's chaos" thing that anything else. MH was a little skeptical about using for such a small pickup, but I pointed out it's always free on a $100+ pick up. Not hard to do $100 for a family of 4. In fact, on the way out the door MH told me "granola bars are on sale, get some of those." & then he ran in a minute later and told me to check the sales ads, there was some good deals. So I ended up spending $60. That was the quick/small grocery run. My conclusion is that this worked out really well. I got lucky, they didn't have to omit or substitute anything in my order. I didn't bother with things that I *knew* were not as well stocked. But still, I figured I'd end up with a different brand or something or other. (I indicated most things I would not accept substitutes ~ all the sales items. But if I had to get a different brand of tomato paste instead of just the generic, or of had to pay a little more for organic onions, whatever).

I think mostly our personalities are, "Meh, it's easier/better to just do things ourselves". We've been doing some Target grocery deliveries to our house (regular shipping), but is nothing I foresee doing once things normalize.

Our menu this week:

Monday: mini meatloaves and roasted potatoes (we have the most amazing recipe, horseradish and chili sauce are the secret ingredients). MH has discovered red potatoes during quarantine so asked us to roast some red potatoes, versus our usual mashed potatoes with this dinner. Just remembering a change that will endure. MM(16) and I cooked dinner.

Tuesday: Burritos (simple/old family recipe) - prepared by DL(14)

Wednesday: South of the Border Wraps (black bean and salsa burritos with green onions and cilantro; simple but divine) - prepared by DL(14)

Thursday: Spinach lasagna - prepared by Moi, with a hovering MH

Friday: Thai chicken (noodles) - prepared by DL(14)

DL(14) has also made a couple of batches of hummus this week.

I share because my kids can cook. 😉

MH is cooking this weekend. Phew! On the menu still (ingredients on hand): Sesame chicken (a new recipe to try), pasta with chickpeas and garlic sauce, Fiesta chicken (crockpot recipe, spicy shredded chicken that we eat with tortillas), salisbury steak, sloppy joes, zuppa toscano, pasta meatball soup, Kashari, Indian butter chicken with jasmine rice, Spicy Stir-Fried tofu & Coconut Rice. This menu is heavy on some of our easier meals. I think MH has another couple of recipes to make next weekend and so we probably won't need another grocery store run for another two weeks. Which feels like a miracle with two teen boys to feed. (MM is still running 8 miles per day; DL has reverted to the home workouts he had been doing for many years before we recently joined the gym. So I am not getting a break with "school sports" retired. Caloric needs continue to be completely absurd. But MM is getting fed some at my job, which helps *a lot*). Will see how I feel about it next weekend...

The IRS updated their website. You can now check on your stimulus "economic impact payment" status. & you can also provide your direct deposit information if you didn't have a "direct deposit refund" on your filed 2018 or 2019 tax returns.

https://www.irs.gov/coronavirus/get-my-payment

The website just went live today and so it may be better to check back later.

You will get a confirmation once you go through the process. Or you will get a message stating "Payment Status Not Available" with a link to information on eligibility rules. (To clarify: You will get the "Status Not Available" message if your income is too high to collect the stimulus payment, or if you are otherwise ineligible). If you don't receive any sort of confirmation, you will need to try again. (I was apparently too slow my first time through, but that will probably be a common problem today. The second time I tried I got a confirmation message).

Edited to add: After one day of the new site "Get My Payment" website being up, there is now a FAQ page that answers a lot of questions:
https://www.irs.gov/coronavirus/economic-impact-payment-info...

The IRS updated their website:

https://www.irs.gov/coronavirus/economic-impact-payments

The IRS has created a new website that allows non-filers to request the stimulus (economic impact) payments. Just go to the link above and you will see more info.

Individuals receiving social security benefits are not required to use this new tool to receive their payments. That said, you'd want to check it out if you have dependents and receive social security benefits (and haven't filed tax returns for 2018 or 2019). This is the only way you can let the IRS know that you have eligible dependents, in this situation.

The IRS also announced that a website for taxpayers to enter direct deposit information, and a website to check the status of your stimulus payment, will be available next week.

They also have a reminder (on the link above) to update your address (the usual channels) if the IRS doesn't have your most current address.

I am absolutely exhausted (work week from hell). So if this is gibberish, I will fix it later.

The U.S. tax stimulus will be $1,200 per adult and $500 per dependent child (under age 17). There is also an income cutoff for receiving these payments. (Just google it, it's all over the news).

Edited to add: The definition of "adult" is mostly someone who is not a dependent. So your college kids are not going to receive the $1,200 and you will not receive $500 for them.

As pointed out to me in my last blog post, you get to keep this stimulus. It sorts out when you file your 2020 tax return if you are owed a bigger stimulus amount (if your income changed, you had a new baby, etc.). But if you were overpaid based on income/dependent changes, you won't have to pay anything back.

Tax Planning Point: They will base these stimulus payments based on your 2019 tax return if it was filed. Based on 2018 if you did not file your 2019 tax return yet. If you had a big jump in income in 2019 and haven't filed yet, you might want to take your time. Not sure how much that helps if it takes 20 weeks to mail out checks. But, I have seen this advice thrown around. I suppose it could be wise to file an extension and not file your tax return until you get your stimulus if that's the case.

The wish of the legislature was to get these checks out in 2 weeks. 🙄 This sounds pretty pie-in-the-sky to me. But I know firsthand the IRS is severely understaffed, and also that many of their workers were sent home. But anyway, I just saw a headline on CNN that the IRS said they need 20 weeks to get checks out. Yes, 20 weeks!

IRS put up a site with some FAQs that I will put at the end of this post. Last I looked (a few days ago) it was mostly, "Check back later for details". In that FAQ they said that if for any reason you didn't file a tax return in '18 or '19, for example if you only had social security income and had no requirement to file, they will set up a simple online process to file a "basic" tax return just to provide the information to get your stimulus check.

Oh yeah, and if you had a direct deposit refund in 2018 or 2019, they will use that information to direct the deposit into your bank account. Direct deposit stimulus payments are expected to be done around April 15th. So if you had a tax refund and chose direct deposit, you might get your stimulus payment in about two weeks. (It's the remaining checks that will take several weeks to process. It will take them 5 weeks to be able to print out the first stimulus checks). On the IRS FAQ they also mentioned setting up some kind of an online form for taxpayers to provide their direct deposit information for a quicker stimulus payment. Details to follow later...

I ended up taking a tax/COVID class yesterday. The tax professionals were pushing back hard. The IRS expecting every fixed-income retired adult to figure out how to request their stimulus?... Tax professionals were insisting there must be a way to cross reference social security records, at the least.

In the end, the IRS has already caved. The IRS will also issue stimulus payments based on social security records. There will still be people who don't file tax returns for various reasons and will have the chance to request their stimulus with some sort of online process, but at least this captures a chunk of the lower income/older population who isn't going to have a lot of help with this stuff in isolation. (& now that I am reading the updated website, they don't have any mention of how you request stimulus in other situations, so it seems to be just changing every day at this point. Who knows).


Economic impact payments: What you need to know

https://www.irs.gov/newsroom/economic-impact-payments-what-y...


Social Security Recipient Update:
https://home.treasury.gov/news/press-releases/sm967


Some Americans could wait 20 weeks to receive stimulus checks, IRS tells House Democrats
https://www.cnn.com/2020/04/02/politics/stimulus-20-weeks-ir...

One final tax thing: IRS has extended tax deadlines from April 15th to July 15th. You will have to check to see if your state has followed suit. There was a lot of back and forth, "What about this and that and this?" Estimate payments, IRA contributions, etc. At this point, it's all extended to July 15th.

Edited to Add: As of April 9th, I see they extended pretty much EVERYTHING, including (June 15th) second quarter estimate deadline. Also finally caved on 3/15 business tax deadlines.

My instinct when seeing the loan deferrals was kind of *meh*. You know you are just prolonging the inevitable, adding interest to the loans, etc. I totally understand from a desperate standpoint. But I guess I am kind of skeptical if it really helps or just kicks the can down the road. Maybe that was my initial *meh* feeling. Does it help people (who need help) or does it just dig their holes deeper?

Well here's some salt to add to the wound. Sharing as an FYI to just be careful.


People deferring their mortgage payments are making an unpleasant discovery: it can wreck your credit rating

https://www.thestar.com/business/personal_finance/2020/03/30...


Bank of America fields 150,000 payment deferral requests, but some customers call mortgage relief ‘misleading’
https://www.cnbc.com/2020/03/27/bank-of-americas-mortgage-de...

We've been on lockdown for just over a week I guess.

MM(16) was offered the summer job last week. They asked him to go in Wednesday? ??? Then quickly thought better of it. I doubt he will have a job at all. Will see...

MH's employer has been in extreme denial. It seems pretty obvious to us they are closed until fall (MH usually has the summers off). He works with the schools. They gave him about 70% pay and sent him home, last two weeks. It started "one day at a time" and ended up "one week at a time". Finally they shut down (yesterday) and told him nevermind, to file for unemployment. They will finish paying him this week and will pay out his sick pay.

We are completely fine for now, but I worry about a longer term recession. & honestly, MH is still recovering from 9/11 economically. He doesn't want to claim unemployment and get ahead of people who need it with more urgency. I told him I'd look it up and we could delay. But while thinking about it now I looked it up and I guess he only has two weeks to file? That's my one minute of googling. We can wait a couple of weeks and get further back in the line. It won't be much, given his job is low-wage and part-time. I don't know if he will be eligible for the new Federal benefits but will take what we can get. 9/11 was very harsh on us financially, so I just don't want to be stupid about it. It's hard for me to take my employment for granted, if nothing else. We are fine if I am employed, yes, but nothing is certain about that, now or ever.

School is going to be closed and online through the end of the school year. Not official yet I don't think, but even the Governor has said schools will likely not open again this spring.

I still feel comfortable going to small office. Even one of my innunocompromised employees has her Doctors' blessing (based on her specific medical situation and the small size of our office). My work is being rendered all sorts of essential at the moment. Construction is essential. Payroll and basic operations are essential. CPAs are essential, etc. For now. I can do most of my work from home, but am still going in two days per week. I think two days is kind of minimum to function "well". But also going in while I can because I know we may all be just working from home at some point.

Though construction is "essential", all the public offices are being shut down and "home sales" is not essential at the moment. So it's been insane busy with new daily challenges. Recorder's office shut down in one of our counties but is doing special recordings? We can't get permits, I guess? Not sure if that will change. Last I heard inspections might go digital/remote. Stuff like that.

I need to back up a bit on this though. I left a recession proof niche in 2018 (no choice, employer retired). I accepted a job in construction. I probably would have not accepted 99% of the jobs in construction but this one is unique. They have several businesses, I do some wealth management (very random), etc. I wasn't really expecting "home building" to stay essential but it is for now due to housing shortages in our state. But regardless of that, my business runs things largely like I run my household. Bills are paid far ahead and they leverage very little. I have not been concerned about the short run (weeks/months). Will see how things continue.

I did accept this job thinking it would be a natural pivot to part-time or semi-retirement during the next recession. Wasn't thinking about it happening so soon and may have some regrets on this front.

So that's kind of the big picture on that. I only leave the house to go to the office. MH only leaves the house to go to the grocery store.

I am just so buried at work, life continues on as it has. We are homebodies and try to generally limit unnecessary errands, always eat our meals at home, etc. so it's been a small change for us at this point. Having the electric car is the icing on the cake. I just recharge overnight, I never have to go to a gas station. MH has been getting groceries while I am home. We will have to take our gas cars out for a spin at some point.

As frustrated as I am that my work stars continue to align at *crazy* (pretty much with infinite random things that are completely outside of my control, spanning many years). As frustrating as that is, I do appreciate what a small disruption this has been to us, that we don't have smaller kids or kids in college. We seems to be in some sweet spot, my kids are very independent and don't need our help navigating school. In contrast, my SIL was in the middle of a remodel, has missing windows in her house and no working shower (due to bathroom remodel). 😂😂😂 My niece was going to Paris next month for an amazing exchange program, etc. Glass half full "monkey mama" is thinking, "Well we had absolutely nothing planned or going on, so this is very little disruption to our lives." It seems a miracle honestly after the last few years we have had. Will take it.

I mean, we did cancel LA Trip #2, which seems entirely jinxed at this point. But will just redo in the fall, if we can. LA Trip #1 was canceled when I was hit by some horrible flu or virus. The purpose of the trip was for us adults to see MM's #1 college choice, so we would like to redo the trip before 2021.

Edited to add: We will get $3,400 stimulus and will have to pay back $500 because MM(16) will be 17 by the end of the year. I expect the IRS does not know his age and that they will advance us $500 for him, if nothing else because this stimulus will be so rushed. Will see. But anyway, just hoarding the cash for potential unemployment. I've seen a lot of tax misinformation out there. The money is yours to keep unless your tax situation changed between 2018/2019 and 2020. They are basing the stimulus payments based on 2018 or 2019 taxes filed, because that's the most recent income/dependent information they have on file. But whether you were truly eligible and get to keep it will sort out when you file your 2020 taxes. **CORRECTION: That last sentence is not true. (Not sure 'strikeout' works on this mess of a website, sorry. I know it works on my sidebar but never works here so I didn't even bother trying). If you are overpaid, you get to keep it!**

MH has been searching for online card games to play with his Grandma (who is in total isolation at this point, because she's 95).

Does anyone have any ideas? Most definitely willing to pay for apps or games if necessary.

Card games preferred, but anything simple and multi player. I joked that DL(14) should get her set up with Minecraft. Is how DL(14) is connecting with his friends. (Or whatever random online stuff kids do these days).

P.S. I should say that anything that can be played on a desktop computer would be preferred. But will make do with whatever, so app suggestions are nice too.

Life is slowing down enough to blog.

Reminder to give blood if you are able. I am having mixed feelings about it. I hadn't given blood in a while, for health reasons. I decided to re-evaluate next week and that I may be able to give blood in this case. Not sure, but just sharing as a reminder to those who are able to give blood.

MH is currently overwhelmed with empathy for our neighbor. We don't really know them from Adam, but the wife was very pregnant. Anyway, he texted them yesterday if they needed anything from the store. They replied they were fine but the baby had just been born. !! So MH is freaking out, just trying to imagine what that must be like. Being new parents is stressful and scary enough without a pandemic. On the flip side, better to have that baby now than any later.

I mentioned in my last post that things are pretty calm here, but that we are avoiding the crowds. We live in a tight knit community and I see a lot of people reaching out to help those housebound, etc. Will see how that continues as panic levels increase.

We personally don't stockpile anything. But when I say this, I think people take it the wrong way. Just as an example, we bought an larger family size of laundry detergent for the first time last week, just because it was on sale. It might have been a week or two ago. Strangely, we have never done this before, but probably just is a factor of sales and pricing. (We did far more laundry with babies, compared to now). Anyway, I think it just happens to be timing but we seem to be well stocked, with MH buying a lot of stuff just by chance in recent weeks. Was just thinking about it more because I did laundry yesterday so was calculating how long our laundry detergent would probably last. 1 year. So we don't "stockpile" because we only bought one box. But I will admit that using things carefully and sparingly (always) most definitely factors into these things. & we've probably never before bought so many things in more family sized packaging. The kids have been eating *so much* that we have been doing that more and more the last couple of years.

I did notice we are almost out of cat litter though. If I was kind of doing this exercise throughout the day of, "How long will this last?" I had an "oh crap" moment as I realized we were about out of cat litter. Just something I hadn't thought about at all. I'll probably run to Target and pick up some when they first open today. I had been avoiding Target/crowds but don't expect it to be an issue early in the morning.

I think things are sinking in, in their own time. I had personally been planning to go to the gym this morning. Sounded like a fine idea last night. I was surprised MH balked at that a little since he just took DL(14) yesterday. But this morning I am realizing it's probably dumb and unnecessary. If MH and I are only leaving the house to go to work at this point... I would have pegged the gym as the first place to be a virus factory. But it just stands out more when you aren't really otherwise going anywhere or doing anything. So why would the *only* place that I go be the virus factory? It may be moot very soon as I imagine they will shut down soon. We've only been back in the gym a month or two, so it's not even a big change for us. I do like the more expensive ellipticals, but I have an elliptical at home. DL(14) has weights and will be fine without the gym for a while. Which is all the more reason it seemed silly to go to the gym today.

The in-laws are coming to our house for St. Patty's Day dinner today. I have mixed feelings about it. I think it's dumb that they are coming, they live 100 miles away. But MIL is gonna do what she's gonna do. If we told her she is not invited, she'd just show up anyway. Mixed feelings? I am *so* confused because MIL is the most hysterical person I have ever known. I am just glad she isn't trying to force us down into a bomb shelter, I guess. I'll take what I can get.

I feel pretty *shrugs* about work. Probably because I work in a very small office. At most, am only exposed to 7 other people on a daily basis. I personally hate working from home. Obviously will do it from the greater good. But MH I think was excited to make me stay home more and I am just, "Nope, NOT volunteering for that." But I do work from home one day per week and it won't be any big change if it comes to that. Nothing I have to make any big adjustments for.

No one else's schools had been closed as of Friday. MH was in disbelief when I told him, so I started looking up counties. Yes, there's probably 4 different counties represented by our 6 employees. Clearly there should be some bigger region-wide decision. This is just kind of silly at this point, why one school is open and the one down the street is not. I imagine that will start to sort out next week.

{I probably wasn't clear. Our kids are home indefinitely. But they are old enough, the only thing I am doing is trying to make sure they have enough food. That's the extent of the brain power I have given to that. MM is practically an adult at this point and they will both do what they need to do if school moves online or whatever happens. They usually eat so much that they pack lunch AND buy. I saw someone defensive saying online people are buying more food to feed their kids at home, and that certainly is adding to the food buying. We bought a *lot* of food this week, for that reason}.

So, will see how work shakes out next week and if we all get sent home. I'd embrace a break after the last few years I've had (my work stars have been aligned to "crazy" for a very long time) but I don't see it in the short-run. Even if we halted all construction, my workload is just infinite at this point. It may slow down or get a little quiet, but at this point I don't foresee any time off whatsoever, for myself. Most everyone else in my office will be impacted by school closures, they all have much younger kids. They are all dual-income or single moms. My kids will be available to help with babysitting if need be. Is an idea that has been thrown around. I just don't know if their schools will end up online, we are supposed to get an update today. DD(14) goes to a very small school that wants to keep things going online. MM(16) attends a very large school and I don't think they will even bother trying online. Their schools are both polar opposite extremes when it comes to size. Will see.

Back to St. Patty's day Dinner... We are soaking the corned beef in beer in the crockpot all day. Yum!

Edited to add: I was right by the gym so I drove by out of curiosity, expecting it to be empty. It was crowded this morning. Target and grocery store were both fairly empty (of people). No one wants to wake up early on a weekend, even during a panic. Except to work out?

Meh. This past week or so just feels like an extension of the past 2 years or so. I might have mentioned that my life is just chaos any more. The curve might veer off into some extra insanity or apocalypse, but to this point it's just kind of life as I know it (lots of chaos). I'm just along for the ride.

Pretty much everything has been canceled or closed here, as of mid-week.

We did lock in a 2.5% mortgage (refi).

MH will most likely be laid off through summer or significantly reduced work hours, because his work is with the schools. This is a *shrugs* to us financially because we don't rely on his income at all. (Nothing has been said, but seems pretty obvious).

This reminds me, MM(16) had applied for a summer job at the water park. They are moving forward as planned, but I can see that could fall through for him.

For about a week there has been panic shopping in our region. Living my whole life in regions without "weather", I don't know that it's anything I've ever seen before. Maybe 9/11? But we didn't cook back then and weren't trying to keep teen boys fed. So I don't remember at all. I suppose that was also before social media. I've not been going into any stores, but everyone keeps sharing pictures.

{Edited to add: "Panic Shopping" is the term I used to describe hoarding. & empty shelves. Things have been calm and civilized. But we also wouldn't go into stores like Target or Costco, which are totally insane right now. We generally stay away from the herd and have been able to continue to do so.}

There's been many other things going on, but too exhausted and probably forgot most of it anyway. I still can't keep track still of who is sick or on the hospital. It continues to be a lot.

I told MH I was *not* watching any movies today, with all of our plans canceled. If we end up hunkering down at home more, will be plenty of time to get caught up on movies. Still working through the Top 100.

Same old, same old here.

My Dad was diagnosed with cancer. The survival rate of this cancer is 97%. Along those lines, they are doing nothing to treat this cancer (for the moment). It's just such an ugly and scary word. Honestly, 90% of why I am writing this down is so that I remember. I will never otherwise remember in this sea of terrible/worse news.

Other things going on...

I booked a very cute hotel in "Little Denmark" in Southern California. We are going to mostly redo the trip I missed in the fall. The purpose of this trip, during spring break, is to visit the small private college than MM(16) is very interested in. This college tour is more for the adults, since he has already been. I wasn't exactly planning to redo the trip I missed (I ended up being too sick to go). But as we get into the details we are using the in-law timeshare first two nights (2-night minimum) and we have to keep it to 3 nights if we don't want to board our cat. So we are just booking the same trip. Otherwise I might have added a night and stayed in Pismo Beach the last night. But we both have work and need to get back anyway.

We always stay at the same property in LA. It's a few blocks from Disney. MH mentioned the place cost "pennies" as far as timeshare points. Didn't think much about that until I typed it out just now. It certainly adds a convenience factor if we have a free home base that we can use frequently near this college.

Back to heavier things, we are also planning to relive our honeymoon for our 20th Anniversary in the fall. Going to Florida and spend some time with MH's Grandfather. He is slowing down considerably and so that is why we decided to kill two birds with one stone. & so it will be some parts fun and some parts heavy.

Florida, will figure out later. MH also wants to go to a film festival in Austin in the fall. I am writing this down for the, "I will never remember this" category.

{Edited to add: I started this post a few days ago. We may start locking in super cheap airfare during this panic}.

We are so spoiled by the weather right now. It's probably a very early spring. But usually spring is a season I don't really get to experience. After working in tax for 20-ish years. Last year I was working two jobs through May, so I most definitely did not experience Spring 2019. This may be the only thing lifting my mood right now. It was 80F degrees the last few days.

Of course, the down side to the weather is we haven't had any winter slowdown whatsoever and work is crazed. Because, of course... *sigh*

I still have a ways to go, but I suppose I feel more "caught up" and in some realm of normal. I've got quite a few little things that if I could just knock out this weekend I would feel pretty good. I need to wrap up some side work (major procrastinating), mail our state tax return (saves me $20 versus e-file), freecycle a couple of more items, etc. I am going to try very hard to get through most of this list Friday so that I can enjoy my weekend.

{I failed because Friday was totally and completely insane.}

There was a coronavirus death a couple of blocks from my office. There was no one on the roads the next day. ??? I called MH and said, "Is it Saturday?" He said no. I said, "Must be Coronavirus, I don't know." Yup, Bingo. I am glad the people in my office seem to be sane. Yes, of course you should stay home if you are ill or immunocompromised, but the freeways that day were a sign of extreme panic.

& Be Greedy when others are fearful.

That pretty much sums it up right now.

**15-year mortgage at 2.25%

**London non-stop flights $350 (round trip) from San Francisco

I'll run the mortgage #s this weekend, but seems a no-brainer at this point. Even with our only 5-ish years timeline in our current home. Heck, if we were further along on the college process I'd maybe even cash out some. (I am not participating in scammy student loans. Borrowing close to 2% for college without all the "student loan" red tape is another story). But it's too early, it's still very likely MM(16) will pick a college that costs pennies.

We are probably going to lock in some airfare this weekend (planned trips to Austin and Orlando). We may also consider some unplanned trips.

It's official. Ting is on the Verizon network now.

See blog link for how it works:

https://ting.com/blog/ting-mobile-service-on-every-network-b...

Here is my referral link if you end up signing up:
https://z181d126bt4.ting.com

FWIW, I've never seen cheaper cell service than Ting. The customer service is far superior to any large cell carrier we have ever had. YMMV, depending on your cell phone usage.

GIFTS:
------
$50 Barnes & Noble
$20 x 6 Target


MOVIES:
--------
$100 Regal


RESTAURANTS:
------------
$50 Cracker Barrel
$50 Olive Garden
$25 Chili's
$ 25 x 2 Jamba Juice (Birthday Gift)


RETAIL:
---------
$50 Kohls (Christmas Gift)
$ 50 x 3 Target

Note: Edited over time to remove used gift cards.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is the "Digging Out" edition of "Gift Card Balance" Updates.

Because... I was cleaning up and found a gift card I apparently completely forgot about. It was received the end of 2017 (just before life became endlessly insane). So yeah, that makes sense.

Edited to add: Ended up finding a second gift card today. MH had been asking me about the B&N gift card and I told him, "That's old, there's nothing on it."

I am too careful to just toss them, so I did double check. But I was really shocked that either card had a balance on them still. That was a nice $75 find today.

I am documenting now so that I don't forget again.

Yesterday was a day of finding things to make my life easier.

I just happened to see in the morning that DL's school was doing e-waste collections. If nothing else, we still had MM's old car stereo (the one that came with the car he inherited) and it's pretty big and bulky. So I figured I would drop that off. I also had a shoebox full of stuff (the older stuff, Best Buy probably wouldn't take). Hell froze over and MH let me recycle my first two smart phones. (He likes to hoard things, I've already asked a few times before. So I Was absolutely shocked when he said he had wiped the data and he was ready to let them go). MH also came up with another box. Some old mice, an old car stereo, some watches, a remote control car, and lots of computer cables. Stuff like that.

They took everything. That was so easy! We already started a box for next time. If we have something big and bulky we will take it over to Best Buy, but for all the little things that add up this is a much easier alternative.

We still have the old HDTV. I am waiting for my (newly divorced) friend to pick it up. She is starting over from scratch so is appreciative of the hand-me-down.

I did sell an item last week for $15. I had been trying to sell for maybe 6 months, but finally got it sold.

I did freecycle 6 empty cat litter buckets last week.

I had also just happened to take in all of our old batteries (several years worth) to the community center last week. It's where my aerobics class is but I stopped going for a few years and then I kept forgetting to take the batteries. It wasn't a separate trip so I guess it's just good I got it done, but we could have dropped those off at the school yesterday if we still had them.

A charity is coming by next week. I always have a perpetual bag of outgrown clothes and other items we no longer want or need.

That I remembered the batteries or dealt with the cat litter buckets, I think is a good sign. That I have the mental capacity to deal with any of that whatsoever... I've mostly dug from under 2018/2019. Phew!

The overall bigger picture is that I took an 8-hour professional class last weekend. (After it got delayed twice. Because of course...). The exciting thing about this is that it was my last big class for all of the rest of 2020. Woohoo! Maybe it sounds like extra punishment to push ahead so far after digging out, but I Was using the momentum, my "unlimited class pass" expires in May, and... If life continues anything like it has been the past two years, I don't take the calm and quiet weekends for granted. I scramble to get things done, because otherwise they never get done.

That feels so good. & probably explains how I have any mental energy whatsoever to deal with anything else.

I ended up being a couple of weekends later than planned, but my plan was for a do-nothing February. Not that I will literally do nothing, but just wanted to get all the nasty chores behind me and then slow down and take a breather.

I am kicking off the do-nothing "1/2 February" with a long 4-day weekend. A very well needed break. I don't mind doing some chores this weekend and focusing energy on the house. IT's just going to be more of a "doing what I feel like doing" kind of weekend, with no big commitments. I am also happy to just be doing current chores and not worrying about playing catch up.

Walgreens just totally blew my mind.

I think because we have a Walgreens very close to our home (really the only store within reasonable walking distance), I've just always gone there for convenience. It's not like it's a big deal to stop by on the way home and pick up a couple of things. (Though I otherwise tend to spend about -0- hours of my time "running errands").

I had an email today about a Walgreens coupon. I know I needed to pick up some feminine products and I had so many coupons at this point I just started throwing them in an online cart to see how the coupons sorted out.

Well, it sorted out to saving about $15. With FREE shipping. What!?

Once I applied all the coupons, it wasn't free (shipping) any longer, but I knew I needed some deoderant and could restock the toothpaste, so I picked up a few more "needs". The total savings ended up being $18 between sales and coupons. With free shipping.

MH already nagged me about carbon footprint, yadda yadda. I honestly don't give a flip. But it's probably rare that I will ever stock up on so much stuff anyway. For this order, I most definitely don't give a flip.

We don't buy anything in "bulk", but I will generally purchase two of every toiletry item just to lessen my trips to the store. (Buying two of everything and using sparingly, this might only mean one store visit every 6 months, if that even).

This probably explains why I have never been more strategic in this area. The other reason is my feminine product spending has always been very low. The exception has been since around 2017 when my hormones went whacked. Now I buy a *lot* of feminine products. Or at least a lot compared to any frame of reference that I have. It's probably wise to shop more carefully with coupons and so on. This just happened during a (rare) more high income time in my life so I haven't really bothered. But today Walgreens blew my mind and I feel silly for not doing this all along. (I look up coupons sometimes and stock up when there's deals, but clearly I could be doing better with this and all of our toiletry purchases).

Walgreens also makes it *so easy* to use manufacturer coupons online.

Received $70 bank interest for the month of January.

Snowflakes to Investments:
--Redeemed $0 credit card rewards (cash back) from our grocery card (back to 6% with the new year, but it pays out a month behind, thus $0 for now)
--Redeemed $99 cash back on Citi card
--Redeemed $21 cash back on dining/gas card

Other snowflakes to Investments:
--Redeemed $12 cash back on Amazon Prime card
+ $ 5 Savings from Target Red Card (grocery purchases)

TOTAL: $137 snowflakes to investments

401k Contributions/Match:
+$415

Snowball to Savings:
+$415 Side Income

Savings (From my paycheck):
+$ 550 to cash (mid-term savings)
+ $100 extra to mortgage

Short-Term Savings (for non-monthly expenses within the year):
+$1,500 to cash (Bumped up for 2020)
-$ 837 Home Insurance
-$ 160 Dentist
-$ 120 Prepay school lunch

TOTAL: $2,070 Deposited to Cash and Investments

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Only one paycheck this month. Literally, because my prior check had been advanced 12/31. MH is also off work. Thus, lower 401k #s this month.

Cash/Interest will be on the higher side until we fund our IRAs. It never makes any sense to decide until the year is over. Will start transferring the $12k to our IRAs (for 2019) once we finalize our 2019 tax return. (Until then, I don't have final #s of what we can contribute to tax-deductible Traditional IRAs; the difference will go to ROTH IRAs.)

Of course, I am always a month behind because these numbers reflect January Income minus December spending (December spending charged and paid off January 1). So when I sit down and enter all my income/expenses for the next month, I already know how the next month will shake out. Because spending is already fairly locked in.

Ugh, February is ugly! Spent way too much money in January. I have side income coming in (if I get it billed), MH should have one small paycheck (for at least 2 days) and I have cash out my ears. I know MH picked up a few Christmas things his mom reimbursed him for. & we treated the whole fam out to dinner again (another student concert for DL) and someone slipped us cash. Got some cash gifts for Christmas ($20 here and there). Plus, I sold a treadmill for $250 cash. This was before I got sick, so might have been November. We were going to turn around and buy a newer (used) instrument for DL. But then I got sick and it fell off my radar. I may keep the $250 on hand for that, but I have so much cash piling up otherwise it's past time to make a deposit. I will cobble together the extra money and make February work (and will zero out deposits versus expenses).

I am just going to roll with it this month and hope for a better February (spending). I know the problem is probably that our budget is way too tight. But we rolled with it so much last year I just left it that way. I just added some significant breathing room with my raise, so figured if we were muddling along without the raise, will do fine without. This just works for our personalities, we rather err on the side of over-saving. Better to save $500 and then have to pull out $100 if we were too aggressive. I will give it a couple of more months to see how things shake out. It may be too too tight, and we will adjust if necessary.

Edited to add: MH has one more paycheck than I realized, in February. He is paid bi-weekly and I got confused on the weeks. He just received a paycheck for $12. 😂 But will be a bigger one in two weeks. I am going to go ahead and change my numbers, and do our deposit to investments for January. If nothing else, I have *cash* to cover that.

Just tracking gift cards.


GIFTS:
------
$ 20 x 6 Target


MOVIES:
--------
$100 Regal


RESTAURANTS:
------------
$50 Cracker Barrel
$50 Olive Garden
$ 25 x 2 Jamba Juice (Birthday Gift)


RETAIL:
---------
$50 Kohls (Christmas Gift)
$ 50 x 4 Target

Note: Edited over time to remove used gift cards.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We've actually been using up some gift cards. Re-gifted a movie gift card and got through some restaurant gift cards.

What a week!

I will start with last weekend. We had our weekend away in Napa and it was lovely. We ended up using our Ruth Chris gift card the Friday before we went out of town. We did one fancy dinner out (Napa), as planned.

The highlight of our weekend was a 3-hour hike we did last Sunday. It was *amazing* and we didn't see a single other soul on the trail. A hidden gem, for sure. These are just a couple of pictures, or a small fraction of the views we saw.





Recent Post:
I can't tell you what I am doing with this latest reset. Crossing my fingers that the tornado around me loses some steam? I'm trying to be more assertive with work hours? But... this only works when everyone isn't out with some emergency or other.

This last week:
My employee was at the hospital all day Monday and thought she would likely undergo emergency surgery. So the work/life balance went down the tubes last week, between that and deadlines.

It only went downhill from there.
--Work Drama (including my other employee being MIA)
--Friend's divorce drama (horrible and exhausting)
--More work emergencies** (a spouse in hospital)
--Sudden death of a childhood/family friend who was 40 (flu/asthma?)

**Have I ever mentioned I work for a very small employer? Yeesh!

Honestly, it was kind of low on the "crazy scale" of late. Because in the past I really didn't mean to be cryptic but it was all happening faster than I could ever remember or process. I ended up having a mostly quiet weekend (this time) and so I can share at all some of the insanity. Which makes it one of the calmer crazy weeks of last two years.

My employee is doing fine. For now. So that is the best news I have right now.

If you hadn't heard, Ting is adding the Verizon network. They initially had the Sprint network, and then added T-Mobile at some point. Later this year it will be all three networks.

They don't have a date yet, but I will pass along if I hear. I just read that they want to roll out the Verizon option early this year.

It's nice to have the multiple options. At current I am on the Sprint network and MH is on the T-Mobile network. I will probably want to switch over to Verizon. This way, when we travel, we have better coverage. It's a neat perk that we aren't locked into all having to be on the same cell network.

I haven't otherwise done a cell/Ting update in a while. Not much to report. My mom dropped off of our plan. We had been going in 50/50 with my parents, for a while. But when we added our kids, I was just having my parents reimburse me $144 per year for their two lines ($6/month/each). We were using most the data/minutes and it wasn't worth tracking once we got so lopsided. Then my mom dropped out mid-2019 so I didn't ask them for any reimbursements last year. Will just cover my dad's cell phone ($6/month, plus some occasional extra travel expenses).

I just looked through the past several months and we've been paying $80 most months. That works out to $16 per month per line.

If you haven't heard of Ting, it's a no-contract, no-commitment cell service. You only pay for what you use. We just pay the $6/line and then we pool all of our data/texts/minutes, which are charged in addition.

We have been using Ting since 2013. They have been exceptional.

My Ting Referral Code:

https://z181d126bt4.ting.com

I think we've always been fairly balanced and there's been an element of "cashing in past frugality" throughout my entire blog. Heck, my husband staying home with kids is probably the epitome of that. But I also think that set us backwards (you know, cutting our income in half) and so maybe it *feels* like it more these days that we are cashing in. There is definitely more to cash in, these days.

I think I am done working OT (for the rest of my life), so that is pretty sweet.

I am still loving my car, which has been a significant step up from any prior car we have owned.

Just some examples.

& now one more...

I personally *love* the gym and actually go to the gym. But... Our old gym went out of business and transferred me to a really horrible gym. I ended up dropping my membership last year. But... even the prior gym I had made some concessions for a gym that actually would fit my budget.

Because I had taken such a large pay cut, I did not feel that I could seriously join another gym last year. I have been going to my aerobics classes ($2.50 per class) and I never feel stronger than when I go to those classes regularly. (It's more of an aerobics/yoga/calisthenics class; the stretching is really key for me). I also purchased a heavy duty (used) elliptical machine. It's a long story, but haven't really used much. It may be too harsh on my knees. I have been really really careful because once I hurt my knee then I am down and have to start all over. I am already in "start over" mode with being so sick the end of last year. I was out at least 4 weeks that I could not work out at all. So, no idea if I will ever use or keep elliptical. It sounds more ideal but the really good ones are very large and expensive. I don't know if I will ever be happy with a home version. This was my giving it a try.

In the end, DL(14) is really into weights and working out. He has a pull up bar and some weights and he seems very happy with that. In fact, I think I mentioned the gym to him a few weeks ago (I don't remember why). & he was kind of just, "I am not a gym person." Maybe being a little too cheap and stingy. But apparently he started thinking about it and had a change of heart. I told MH that I was fine with it. That MM(16) started doing gymnastics around the same age, which is roughly $100 per month. So I threw out $100/month budget. Thinking that the adults might have to join also and just being open minded to giving him a comparable "gift". Not that I expected it to end up being that much.

MH and DL have been shopping around the gyms. But some of them don't even allow kids at all. Planet Fitness is silly for someone who wants to do big heavy weights (we just got one in the past few months, too bad because that one is probably more my style). We are getting a 24 Hour Fitness soon and so the gym we joined may be a placeholder until 24 Hour opens up. But the only thing that worked at all was a smaller regional gym that is fairly high end. They have *all* the amenities. Talk about a complete 180. Definitely the fanciest gym I have ever belonged to. I guess DL(14) had good timing, with all the January deals.

Oh yeah, but I have to back up. I really thought he would just join a more discount gym, at first. Some of the kids' friends were really pushing that they join the gym we ended up with. My initial reaction? UGH! For one, the sticker price is totally insane. (But no one actually pays that). These are people who are all in major financial messes. So this is why my initial reaction was to roll my eyes. I really did not think we would end up there.

But we did, because that's what works for us now. DL(14) is in heaven. I told MH I loved the gym and I am not picky. As long as they have ellipticals that work, is all I really care about. So he was a little nervous to sign up without me seeing it, but he did it. We all went over there last Sunday, to check it out. It was definitely a good choice. It's *January* and I didn't have any trouble finding a machine. So I think I am good. My needs are very basic.

MM(16) did not want to join. Fair enough, he runs 50+ miles per week with track.

We ended up paying about $85/month for the three of us. We chose this gym specifically because they allow minors to attend (and join?) without adults. It was also the only one that a minor could join that he liked at all.

When the friends were pushing and that was where we ended up, all I could think was I glad we saved our dollars in the past. This might be just a few years (max) that we enjoy the amenities of the larger gym. But we are more able to do that because it's not something we "expected" that we must have for the past 20 years.

In the end I think this is probably a zero net change to our budget because MM(16) has no time for gymnastics whatsoever with his current school/sports schedule. So it may just be that I move the gymnastic dollars over to the gym dollars. Just shifting things around a bit.

Edited to add: I almost forgot to mention, this is how DL(14) is dealing with his mental health ups and downs. Working out has helped him tremendously. It's really the only thing that seems to be helping him.

Also, I am glad my son knows that this is most definitely a "want"; he was doing very fine without.

I received dividend 1099s yesterday so was able to complete our taxes. I just am waiting for tax software updates now. (I probably won't finalize until I take my tax update class, probably in another week. Make sure I am not missing anything).

Now I am focusing on the kids. DL(14) didn't have any stock sales last year so I should just be able to report his interest/dividends on my tax return. The taxes on that should be $0.

I tried to pull their 12/31 statements to confirm YTD interest income last night but it was +$9 which didn't seem right. I thought the statement was off and decided to deal with it later. Well, this morning I am going through all of DL's statements making sure they match my financial records. I had no idea that their "7% interest" credit union had also done a special dividend this year. +$9, which made the actual interest rate on that account 9% for the year. Wow! (They got a bonus $8/$9 from both of their credit unions).

DL(14) had $53 interest income this year. His allowance was $150 for the year and he deposited another $325 cash during the year. It's hard to say because we switched him from cash to electronic system mid-year when we opened his checking account. Some of that cash may have been accumulated allowance money or gifts from prior years. & clearly he had some cash spending because I know he made some purchases but nothing that came through electronically. But as it stands, he received $528 (gifts) and spent -$0-. 2020 will probably be more thorough in the electronic records since he will have his checking account for the entire year. & I believe he owes me $20 for birthday/Christmas gifts. Will see if he just hands me cash for that or if he needs to make an electronic transfer.

MM(16) will be much more complicated, with the jobs and everything. In fact, he told me he worked for my old/forever employer in 2019 and I didn't believe him (I didn't remember that at all). But in the end, I do have some deposits recorded. I just looked and I did not do a great job of keeping track of that. Unless maybe I threw his pay stub in my tax file. (Is very possible). I generally don't wait for W-2s, or want to make sure the W-2s are correct. I have all that info in Quicken somewhere, so I can probably use that if nothing else. Or maybe he has the pay stub and can produce it. I should probably just ask him.

I will start checking that his bank/interest statements match Quicken. He did his own taxes last year (with my help) and I think he can just do it on his own this year. Even if I sit down and go through it with him every single year, by the time he graduates college he should be more than competent to do on his own. In my house if you have a job, you can do your own taxes. So that is why he did his own taxes last year.

Knock on wood, but the year is going well so far. More peace and quiet than I remember in *forever*.

I can't tell you what I am doing with this latest reset. Crossing my fingers that the tornado around me loses some steam? I'm trying to be more assertive with work hours? But... this only works when everyone isn't out with some emergency or other.

{I can't imagine what else I could possibly do within my realm of control. Which is why I am just at the point of crossing my fingers}.

MH has the month off, so I expect this is contributing to the peace.

I did "fire" one of my side clients. The feeling is mutual and it is all good. This leaves me with one remaining client. I am more than ready to move on and will be rid of them soon. But the workload is just about an hour a month, so I can give it a little more time. 12/31 is my hard deadline, not wanting to drag any more red tape into 2021.

Of course, *the* most exciting thing is that I am enjoying my first tax season off in 20 years. 🎈🎉🎈 I always worked several jobs in my teen/college years. Post college I have always had a busy/OT season. So... I have started semi-semi-retirement? Was a step down that I wasn't particularly planning or expecting.

A couple of weekends ago MH went to the Bay Area to help his parents with some things. I was not up to it whatsoever.

Last weekend we hosted a game night. In the spirit of trying to get out of "reactive" mode (just reacting to everything that is going on), this was our attempt to do something more proactive. When talking about it, we were pretty set on just setting a time every month with "no excuses". So when it turned out that MH already had a commitment on our first game night, I told him not to worry about it. & then I remembered why I never invite any adults anywhere, because they have to plan 90 days in advance or whatever. 🙄 Then MM(16) wasn't feeling well. But DL(14) pulled it through. He's definitely the most social and has always had a big group of friends. The played a lively game of Diplomacy. (I really didn't think anyone would play that with him. But the art school kids seem to embrace some of this stuff from a more theatrical standpoint). All I did was cook and clean all day Saturday (so behind on the house, and MH wasn't here to even run to the grocery store for me). But it was most definitely worth it. I enjoyed taking all that "work" energy of decades past (usually working Saturdays) and channeling it into my family and friends.

This weekend has been more of the same. I had an opportunity to do some unique charity work, so that was my big commitment this weekend. It was exhausting, but very rewarding. We also hosted all of our parents Friday night; DL(14) had another band concert. I am enjoying having the time for different things.

MH and I are going to Napa on another weekend. It sounds absolutely divine. It's such a short drive and we usually keep it very low key. Will probably do one nice dinner out and a hike. But MH's birthday is this month and I usually take off a weekend for that. So that will be more in the realm of our normal. I suppose it will be nice not having to cram and worry if I can really manage a Saturday off.

I do have a mountain of bad news, but it's sad to say that it doesn't feel like much because the pace has slowed considerably. Phew! I even made some comment a couple of days ago that 2020 was off to a much better start and MH looked at me like I was crazy. Fair enough, but these things are relative. His Grandma is very sick and we are worried about her. My Dad is going in for a biopsy next month. Etc., etc.

Edited to add: Things took a turn, back to emergency mode. We are rushing off to the Bay Area today because MH is so concerned about his Grandma. I am horrified by the idea of bothering her or bringing more germs, but it's what he needs to do so I will support him. (The kids and I will let her rest). I am still very grateful we had two weeks of calm and peace, before diving into the latest emergency. I think she will probably be fine. Her attitude has always been, "My arm is falling off? It's just a flesh wound." After hearing from "always completely hysterical in a medical situation" MIL we did skype GMIL and we both felt immensely better. She is clearly fine and shrugging it off. But we are being cautious because she is a 95yo with pneumonia.

I know I have shared in the past that I don't use the shopping carts at Target. Nor the baskets, most the time. If I can't hold it in my hands I don't need it. (Unless it's a very specific trip for more items or something larger). I have sometimes looked ridiculous and been asked if I need a basket, but it was worth not being tempted to spend more money.

So I felt, "Exactly!" when I saw this article yesterday:

https://www.tasteofhome.com/article/shopping-cart-size/


There's a reason you can't leave Target without spending more than you planned—blame the shopping cart.

One of the very first shopping carts, invented in 1937, was simply a metal frame that held two wire shopping baskets. Eventually the design evolved to one basket, and the nesting capability was added for easy storage. The first shopping cart baby seats were added in the 1950s. For the next several decades, the shopping cart design remained the same—except when it came to size. The average shopping cart has almost tripled in size since 1975. From a stack of two hand baskets to the gigantic carts we see today, why the change?

Bigger Carts Lead to More Spending
There are a couple of theories out there as to why shopping carts have gotten bigger and bigger: wider shopping aisles and larger shopping budgets are leading people to buy more goods and groceries. But there could be a more subliminal reason: to trick the consumer into spending more. Marketing consultant Martin Lindstrom told Today that when the shopping cart was doubled in size in an experiment, shoppers would buy 40% more merchandise.

I had figured out that a shopping cart makes it way too easy to buy crap that you don't need. I had never really thought about how they make the carts bigger so that you can add more. It's kind of fascinating how much that works psychologically.

Skip the shopping cart next time. It really works.

2019 TALLY:

$550 Gift Cards (Citi, Moi)
$150 Bank Bonus
$ 70 Amazon Gift card (Amazon Prime, MH)
-----------
$770 TOTAL *ONE-TIME REWARDS*

Other Rewards:
$ 29 Citi Price rewinds (RIP)

Ongoing rewards:

+$320 AmExRewards (6% cash back groceries/streaming services)

+$83 Target rewards (5% discount Target purchases; mostly groceries)

+$177 Visa Rewards (3% cash back fuel/restaurants)
Ended up also using for groceries in Q4 (3% cash back)

+$887 Citi 2% card (2% back everywhere - health insurance/medical is the big expenses that we charge, is more than our mortgage payments)

Grand Total = $2,266

I just want to add that historical figures below do also include bank bonuses. They just don't generally work very well for us so I do not utilize as much. (We did -0- bank bonuses in 2017/2018).

Year 2011 = $4,164
Year 2012 = $2,782
Year 2013 = $2,623
Year 2014 = $3,128
Year 2015 = $2,585
Year 2016 = $1,906
Year 2017 = $3,578
Year 2018 = $2,096
Year 2019 = $2,266

Total 9 Years = $25,128
***Mostly Tax-Free Income***

MM(16) also earned a $150 sign up bonus, a $10 credit for switching to paperless statements, and 5% back on gas for one quarter.

Note: I have been tracking since 2011 because that's when the rewards got CRAZY. We have always utilized cash back on credit cards. It's just been extra rewarding during the past decade.

***CAVEAT - I absolutely do not recommend utilizing credit card rewards in this manner, unless you are in full control of your credit card spending. We treat our credit cards like debit cards; only charging if we have the cash on hand already. We've never paid a cent of late fees or interest.***

It's time... It's past time. Turning off the allowance for MM(16).

First I wanted to back up a bit. We started giving our kids a $2/week allowance at age 5, with the intention of them starting to learn about money. From that point on, if the kids wanted to buy something, most of the time it was, "You have the money, you figure it out." It's valuable to start learning these lessons long before you start having a bigger income to manage. Waiting until they got a job and started making $15/hour (a lot of money for a teenager) would be too late, in my opinion. Could be worse, but you miss a lot of learning opportunity if you wait that long.

I've posted before, but I really expected the $2/week allowance to increase over time. But my kids have been so frugal and careful with their money it never came up until DL was maybe 13 or 14 and recently asked for an allowance raise. (He hasn't spent any of it honestly, but he asked and I thought it was reasonable).

Both MH and I worked pretty steadily since age 15 and so I just always presumed we'd turn off these allowances once the kids turned 15 or 16 and got a job. The allowances have served their purpose. They are making 10 or 20 or 30 times as much with summer jobs.

In the end I had a miscommunication with MH. I could swear he was not down with turning off the allowance when MM got a job and when he turned 16? It's too small for me to care either way at this point. But... I don't even remember what conversation we had after that. But I put it on my calendar January 1 to turn off his allowance. (Lord knows I can't remember a single thing in the chaos of the last few years. No room whatsoever in my brain). I don't remember anything or why or when I even put this on my calendar. But I do remember clearing it up with MH that was not at all what he said or meant. He is now very much, "Why does he still have an allowance!?" I don't know, because I thought you wanted him to? So I am going to turn off that auto transfer today, saving us $3 per week.

I expect we discussed with MM(16) at some point but gave him a little notice. I put it in my calendar because I knew I would forget.

I suppose this makes the official cutoff age 16.5. It's worth noting if we want to be consistent with DL. (And... I put that on the calendar).

I skipped the last couple of years, but will revisit our Top 5 and Lowest 5 expenses for 2019.

{I keep track of all our spending/accounts using software, so I still have meticulous records even if I have mostly put it on ignore the past couple of years}.



2016 Commentary:
I highlighted the vacation spending because we aren't big vacation spenders and these are very one-off type expenses. Our annual budget is only $2,000 for vacation, and is more in the realm of what I foresee spending the next several years.

On the mortgage, we made an extra payment (or two?) versus last year. We should be under the $7,000 mark on mortgage interest in the future. This is one of those expenses that is snowballing downward very rapidly.

Auto expenses include repairs/maintenance, insurance, registration, fuel. (We pay cash for cars; no car payments).

{I do have details on the autos, and I also track expenses per vehicle. For 2016: $1944 fuel, $1800 insurance, $278 registration, $803 repairs/maintenance}.

Medical expenses are insane, but our insurance has covered almost seven figures in medical procedures for my husband (before age 40). So, at least I know we get our money's worth, and it's very important for us to have high quality insurance. I am sure given different circumstances we would have just gone "cheap". It's been our biggest expense for several years, so is nothing new. It's been our biggest challenge with *one income* living, but we live so far below our means that we have been able to deal with it. But I know it's so glaring that I should address.

**I have not included income taxes because is not a large expense for us.**

The interesting thing about our lowest expenses is that it tends to be our more luxury spending. I am sure I have said it a million times before, but will say it again. We don't do without. We just are careful and rein in costs, and shop around. & prioritize what is the most important. So most of our "luxury" type spending ends up towards the bottom.

I expect our total expenses to be about the same for the next couple of years. We have some home maintenance ($$$$) to tend to. Starting to talk braces for both kids. So stuff like that will probably replace our recent vacation spending. These are things we also want to take care of while our income is high and before our kids start college.

2019 Commentary:
Not much has changed but we did bump "Vacation" off of our list, as expected. Travel is not something we highly value and I don't expect it to be a priority in the near future (if ever). I can't even imagine why we'd spend $9k on vacation. 2016 was a ridiculous year of over-paying for just a couple of domestic trips to D.C. Very one-off.

Medical tops the list as always, but was bumped up with the Orthodontia expenses. (It's a medical tax deduction, so I lumped ortho with our other medical expenses).

Groceries bumped up significantly with MM(16) doing track this school year. So that bump up is mostly adding track for 6 months, though may include a couple of years of increasing appetites (in between). 2020 will be interesting with the full year of track. I had bumped up my grocery budget to $850 monthly ($10k annually) in 2020 but I wouldn't be surprised if I have to bump it up more mid-year.

I think where we are at with this is we give up and only have to feed that kid for another 18 months at home. There was some talk of revisiting Costco at some point, but we keep coming back to that it's just not convenient whatsoever. (It doesn't help that everyone we know personally who raves about Costco spends a bajillion dollars on food). We would probably be smart to ask our parents to pick up a few things here and there. We had some $9 pizza on Christmas and I wouldn't mind having a few of those around, but then again we don't have any freezer space and we just don't feel like re-inventing the wheel for 18 months. Meh.

P.S. We did offer MM(16) to reimburse him 50% (in cash) of any "employee discount" grocery savings he can earn us if he can get a job at the grocery store we frequent. It's actually walking distance from our house and a very strong job contender. Depends how many hours he can get there. If he wasn't doing track, it would probably be a done deal.

Mortgage interest is snowballing downwards, as expected.

Without any big vacation expenses, Auto takes it place back at #5. It was our first year with three cars.

Haircuts bumped up because my kids are interested in hair cuts now. MM(16) actually took himself for a haircut the other day. & I don't have to drag DL(14) kicking and screaming any more. Phew!

We mostly make it a rule not to buy any subscriptions and are pretty conscience about refusing to be nickel and dimed for anything. (Man those little things add up!) But... MH needed to sign up for a newspaper subscription (online for $20?) in order to continue to participate in the newspaper rewards program. He always gets free movie tickets and show tickets. This was $20 well spent. He won several movie and concert tickets in 2019 and he won another Kindle Fire? He easily won $500 worth of prizes last year. Sadly, they ended their rewards program (last month?) so there is no more of that. He did not renew this subscription, accordingly.

This last item didn't make the Bottom 5 list but is worth mentioning. MH signed up for a movie pass type deal with a regional theater (the one closest to our home) and pays $20/month for unlimited movies. Truly unlimited. Talk about luxury spending (what is a very high priority for him) taking up very little of our budget. That's been awesome. Just like movie pass, he is still running up reward points with every movies he sees, so this deal also comes with a lot of free movie passes so I can tag along (about as often as I would want to, which is not a lot).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Some 2018 versus 2019 notes:

Car expenses went down by $1,200, though we added a third car. Some of it was MM(16) taking over the "third car" expenses when he turned 16 (mid-year). Most of it is switching to electric vehicle/fuel for my new/longer commute. & of course, we no longer have to pay for all that fuel to shuttle MM(16) around, so we had some cost savings there.

Grocery spending +$1,300 over last year.

Medical +$7,500 (+orthodontia) - clearly a one-off expense.

Professional Dues -$2,000. My employer (very unexpectedly) offered to pay and also reimbursed me for some 2018 expenses.

Misc. -$3,000
Not entirely sure what that is about, but we did consciously scale back on the show tickets and so on with my job change and salary reduction. Then again, I was making so much side income we had some "what the heck?" moments.

In 2018 we did replace our cell phones (ahead of expected job change and salary reduction) and bought a new washer and dryer. We did also buy a charger for the new car (an auto expense, I suppose). We did spend $2,300 on concerts and events: A few symphony shows, Iron Maiden, Weird Al, Sketchfest, Robot Wars, a musical, a book signing, and various smaller concerts and events.

In 2019 we did buy a (used) elliptical for almost $1,000 and a new TV and sound bar. But... LOL, we spent $70 on concerts and events. I suppose we took that very seriously that was the thing to go with my pay cut. I am actually surprised because I feel like we were pretty lax with all the side income I Was earning. This is also not completely fair because we spent $200 but it's offset by a $120 reimbursement from MH's friend for some concert tickets we bought (the year before).😁 We clearly had less bigger purchases and significantly cut down on the concert/event spending. It's just nothing I would have remembered, without seeing it in such glaring black and white.

I don't know that anything will change in 2020. My budget is pretty tight by the time I factored our actual grocery spending, tax increases, health insurance increases, etc. If we had some extra money I would like to go to the Symphony more, but the Symphony is expensive. It might be mostly on hold until our kids are done with college. Our art museum does some pretty amazing concerts for $10 or $20, so we will be creative and figure it out. We also do go to a lot of concerts and musicals (professional level) at the art school which is maybe why I don't *feel* much difference between the two years. & duh, we probably bought a lot of tickets in 2018 that we used in 2019.

2019 Goals

**Financial**

[X]$12,000 to IRAs 2019 (MAX)
...($12,000 @ 12/31/19)
...Not entirely sure how we will fund this. Because my salary decreased by $12,000 this year, this was the obvious thing to give. It will have to come from gifts, MH's income, my bonus, and/or shifting money from taxable investments. Funding our IRAs is always our first priority, but just will not be funded from my salary.
UPDATE: For 2019, ended up funding with second job and MH's income.

[X]$7,000 to savings
...($7,175 @ 12/31/19)
...$550/month, plus interest.
...Topping off with snowballs
UPDATE: Goal Met. Even when I subtracted out major expenses paid with cash, extra to mortgage, etc., we somehow ended up meeting our savings goal. I definitely over shot. Some "over preparing" on our part.

[X]$1,500 to investments
...($2,033 @ 12/31/19)
...Funded with snowflakes
UPDATE: Goal Met. Did better than expected, but did it with the snowflakes.

[X]9% of my full-time income to work retirement plan
...This is the minimum for the match; I'd otherwise rather fund IRAs.
Note: Maxing out IRAs is additional 15% to retirement. This is very deja vu to lower income years. The last time we saved 20%+ to retirement was during our lowest income years. This is due to substantial tax savings and employer contributions (how I am funding the entire 9%). Plus, if we max out IRAs regardless, it's a bigger percentage of a smaller income.

STRETCH GOAL:

[/]$6,000 to mortgage
...($3,370 @ 12/31/19)
...$3k per year to pay off in 20 years (from last refi); also ensures that we pay more principal than interest
...In years past I had funded with OT, but am no longer working at a job with OT. This is a placeholder because we skipped 2018. If we have a windfall of any sort, I'd like to pay down $3,000 for 2018 and $3,000 for 2019. For now, this is our lowest financial priority (expect to fund some home improvements instead during 2019, and tend to other expensive cash flow items first).
...2020 & Forward, our much bigger priorities will be college and down payment for next home ($$$$$). I don't expect to have any future mortgage goals (but to pay off when we sell in a few years).
UPDATE: 1/2 Goal Met. I ended up putting +$3k (2018 placeholder) as a stretch goal for 2020, and will be adding $100/month mortgage in lieu 15-year/lower interest refi. If MM(16) gets accepted to and chooses private college (likely), we will probably really and truly abandon future mortgage goals. For now, have more cash/income than we expected.

Some commentary from my original 2019 Goal Post:
Money that was going to taxable investments before, is now going to 401k. From a net worth standpoint, it's all well and good, but I am not thrilled because I feel like I need a bajillion dollars cash (teen drivers x2, braces x2, home repairs, etc., all in the very near future). "College savings" is accordingly on the back burner again, but I am okay with earmarking ROTH money (for college) during years we contribute 20%+ to retirement. Otherwise, it wouldn't make any sense to be so retirement heavy, at the expense of the rest of our finances, but everything is so "hell if I know," I'd rather err with piling up ROTHs.

I do also expect some side income in 2019, but will just be hoarding up cash to fund IRAs and to pay for big planned expenses.

All of the above is still true. It feels good to knock out braces ($$$$$) and is mostly why I worked second job 1/2 of the year. We don't borrow for things, we've always been creative and/or just make more money as needed.

College is still complete limbo, "Heck if I know." Somewhere between -$0- and six figures. Should be more clear in another 12 months. I could see just doing the 9% to retirement (work retirement plans with matches) if MM(16) ends up at private school. But it's too likely he will end up at our "cost pennies" alma mater, so I don't see the point of changing anything at this point. Could be drastic changes next year when we get out of limbo land.

+$105,000!

Wow, what a year! My money worked harder than I did this year, for sure.

{We've many times had six figure real estate increases in a single year, but have never had these kind of stock market gains}.

It was a good year to have this win. I had taken a pay cut and we had some significant expenses. Which makes it all the more incredible how the year turned out.

I was just excited and wanted to make sure to crunch numbers first thing to see where we landed.

We paid down the mortgage by $9,000 and the rest was stock market contributions and gains. (If you are wondering why I'd rather invest than pay down my mortgage more rapidly, this is probably a good illustration. Maybe especially considering that we have also had many $100k+ gains with a mortgaged home).

Today we could pay off our mortgage and still have $340,000 cash/investments. For the first time, we could do this with only cashing out about 1/2 our ROTH IRA and all of our taxable investments. It's the first time we could leave everything else intact (emergency fund, kids' college, rest of retirement, etc.). I am not tempted yet, but honestly, if I had an additional $50k in investments, we could pay off our mortgage AND leave six figures in our ROTH IRA. At that point, I would probably be tempted. Especially with just cashing out at a peak. Taking the money and running. I've always said there is a tipping point. I just have never been so close to the tipping point. If my stocks go up $100k next year, I wouldn't rule it out. (We seriously considered doing this with our house in 2005, but we just missed the boat. We had literally decided to move and cash out our house, doing a second "moving to a significantly lower cost region" move, but the market started to tank before we executed the move. We clearly weren't the only ones who had this idea). I am afraid we are probably in "will just miss the boat territory" this time too. Will see...

P.S. I'd honestly rather the market go down and be able to buy stocks cheaper. While it's fun to see big numbers on the balance sheet, I don't think of this huge stock market run up during my prime working years as being terribly useful to my long-term wealth.

We need our net worth to continue to increase (on average) $50k per year to reach our Financial Independence goal at age 50.

Estimate Net Worth Change for 2020:
Mortgage: Paydown $7,000
Investments: Contribute $4,000
Retirement: Contribute $21,000
Investment Returns: $18,000 (would need 4% gain)
TOTAL INCREASE: $50,000

Our net worth changes never look anything like our estimate (it's rare any asset class actually has an average year). But, I go through this exercise just to make sure my goal is realistic and doable.

P.S. We will likely hit the $1 mil mark with our assets this year. Just $30k to go... That will be a very exciting milestone.

P.S.S. Good Riddance to 2019! I wish I was more optimistic about 2020, but it's shaping up to be very difficult. I can only hope for some space whatsoever to breathe and process anything that is happening.

Received $60 bank interest for the month of December.

Snowflakes to Investments:
--Redeemed $0 credit card rewards (cash back) from our grocery card (maxed out 2019 grocery rewards).
--Redeemed $83 cash back on Citi card.
--Redeemed $33 cash back on dining/gas card; used for grocery rewards this month

Other snowflakes to Investments:
+ $231 Re-Invest Dividends
+ $ 8 Savings from Target Red Card (grocery purchases)

TOTAL: $355 snowflakes to investments

401k Contributions/Match:
+$1,400

Snowball to Savings:
+$1,100 MH Income
+$ 500 Bonus
-$ 250 Charity

Savings (From my paycheck):
+$ 550 to cash (mid-term savings)

Short-Term Savings (for non-monthly expenses within the year):
+$1,400 to cash
-$ 482 Flood Insurance
-$ 195 AAA
-$ 160 Vacation Expense
-$ 125 Yearbooks (2)
-$ 100 School Concert

TOTAL: $4,053 Deposited to Cash and Investments

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Vacation expense was $100 fuel and $60 eating out, MH's LA trip. We planned to spend a wee bit more on that trip, but I ended up sick at home instead. We canceled the one hotel night we were going to pay for, he used his parents' timeshare for two nights.

$100 school concert ~ $60 to buy tickets for us and all the grandparents. We also ended up spending $40 to feed everyone the night of the concert. This is the art school we pay -0- to, so I am always happy to contribute monies. I save a bajillion dollars with all the free/public art classes.

I guess MM(16) was sick that night (before he gave me his awful flu). Always someone can't make it last minute and I give away the $9 tickets. It always makes someone so happy. So when we got there I went up to the box office and told the lady buying tickets I had an extra student ticket if she wanted it. She didn't even look at me or say Thank You. I told MH, "Wow, that was really unsatisfying." Usually the response is more like, "Really????!!! Thank You!!" She looked so stressed out buying those tickets, I'd like to think I made her life a little easier.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So... I am completely dumbfounded by this update. This was our level of savings when I was working second job. But I guess that it comes down to getting my raise and getting that $800/month back. I wouldn't have thought it was going to be a particularly lucrative month, was more just our typical savings kind of month.

But... This probably sums up pretty well how I ended up with an extra $3,000 that I felt comfortable throwing at the mortgage. I decided quite unexpectedly and last minute to knock that goal out. Sidebar is updated. (Had $3k+ cash left over after setting aside $12k for IRAs; we also have a 12-month emergency fund).

401k was a little extra this month because I received a 3rd paycheck 12/31 (my small business employers always advance the last paycheck of the year for tax purposes). I did also receive a bonus, which bumped up my 401k contribution.

The bonus is a new thing I have never had before. I didn't blog about it because it was not too exciting. I mean, it's EXCITING. But... I didn't pay any taxes in whatsoever for my self-employment income this year, so I put most of my bonus to taxes. It was a choice that I made. (This had been my plan all along, but I had expected a summer bonus to cover it). It's nothing like it sounds. My tax rate only ended up being about 10% on all that side income. Because I ended up with $8k orthodontist expenses to offset my income. I know there is definitely a huge element of financial savvy and strategy that comes with my tax knowledge. Like knowing I can just withhold my SE taxes from my paycheck, and it's all the same in the end. (Which I felt was prudent because I had no idea where on earth my taxes would land this year, until I got confirmation of bonus this month). But... Honestly 90% of the time it is just being in the right place at the right time. I had $10k of write-offs I wouldn't have had in prior years, between the ortho and tax law changes. So I made out pretty well.

I still had $500 left over (from bonus) after that, which I threw at savings.

Edited to add: We did our "gift from in-laws to Charity" thing over the weekend. I ended up making all of our donations Sunday night, and realized I was about $250 short of what I Wanted to do. Which makes sense, because we used to allocate my old Christmas bonus ($250) every year to charity. {I guess I consider that more of a "Christmas Gift" than a "Bonus". My bonus this year was a few thousand dollars, which is the very new and different part. I have absolutely never before had an employer give me extra money "just because". To clarify why I said I hadn't received a bonus before}. I ended up subtracting $250 from bonus above and updating numbers.