Not much to report here.  Everyone is peeling off, with MH going back to work and the GF starting a new job tomorrow.  It should be a lot more peaceful on the home front.

I just looked up the teaching credential deadlines, out of curiosity, re: TM(21). It looks like the deadline might be 3/1.  & then the deadline for the school district money (they might pay for most of his expenses) is in early July.  He has some time.

I went to the dentist a couple of weeks ago and I noticed last week? that the charge never showed up on my credit card.  I didn't reach out yet because the dentist's son is a freshman at MM(23)'s college and I figured they were moving him into the dorms last week. 

I was just updating my financial records and I saw the charge pop up when I downloaded it into my financial software.  I thought, "Odd it took so long, but there it is."  It wasn't until I looked closer that I realized they. paid. me.  😂

I can't think of that ever happening before.  Where I thought I was paying someone and they accidentally issued a credit?  

The dentist's wife handles the front desk stuff and while I usually say very little to her, I remember talking to her about moving into the dorms, her baby going off to college, etc.  Clearly this was very distracting.  

This reminds me.  A sidetrack...

I always say that everyone tells me their money stuff.  I guess this extends to my dentist.  I just always found in entertaining but never thought too much about it.  But I get it, he's trying to find a topic to connect with me.  

My dentist told me a while ago he hadn't 'saved for college' because he has a bajillion dollars.  He seems to hold me in the same regard, which is crazy to me.  Even when he asked me if we had 529 plans and I told him our income was too low to get any benefit from that.  Comments like that go in one ear and out the other.  He apparently thinks I am a baller.  Maybe I will reinforce this baller opinion when I pay him back this week, without complaint.  I get it, he is probably used to dealing with more financially stressed people.  

Side note:  While the dentist is a baller, he mostly talked about his kids going to community college and/or graduating very quickly, in recent years.  It sounds like that came more from his kids than him.  They are/were high school day traders and very money focused.  It's interesting given how 99% of these conversations are about how community college is beneath people.  My dentist didn't have that "it's beneath us" attitude and I am sure that is a lot of it.  The final college choice might have been somewhat influenced by my family.  The dentist always seemed envious about my kids' degree and college choice.  Although he is clearly very passionate about dentistry, he was an engineer in another life.  & apparently holds this college in high regard. 

Edited to add: I Zelled the money back to them but it's annoying because I do not use a cash system.  (My system revolves around charging everything on a credit card.)  It's just mildly annoying.  

MM's FINAL net college costs:

$43,242 Tuition/fees** (4 Years)

+$11,589 5th Year Tuition/Fees 

+      644 Misc. Fees & Supplies

-10,506  Tax credits 

-19,642  CA middle class grants 

-  7,500  Scholarships

---------

$17,827 Net Tuition cost  

**Includes $1K for one summer school class

Side note: MM(23) only got that 4th year middle class grant because he added a double major and extended another year.  Net tuition costs would have been about the same, for 4 or 5 college years.

I also went back and added misc. fees.  There was an up front orientation fee ($275) for their very involved week-long orientation.  & I paid some supplies for classes (mostly lab supplies) and a couple of book purchases.  MM(22) might have covered some smaller purchases along the way.

When I went to college, books cost about as much as tuition did.  I don't know how much of it is their particular degrees or the public colleges being more sensitive about affordability.  I know that TM(21) has had to buy a couple of books for a Korean class, but it's the only purchase I have seen come through his credit card.  I felt like both kids bought scan trons or blue books their first year and then just never bought after that.  (Found a cheaper place to buy?  Or found somewhere for free?)  IIRC, they dutifully bought some of this stuff Freshman year.  Maybe they just found they didn't really need to buy these items.

Anyway, rounding up, will just call this an $18K degree.  Is what I will say when it comes up in conversation.

I am still waiting for MM(23) to sort out his housing deposit, utilities, etc.  Now that he has a job, I think I am just going to let it go.  I would have taken any utility reimbursements he got from his roommates (since I already reimbursed 100% of what he paid) and the housing deposit he owes back to me.  But I may just let it go and remove myself from his accounts.  I was just staying on while I was sending him rent monthly.  I don't expect as many reimbursements between us, going forward.  Will switch to Zelle or Venmo.  Anyway, will give it a few weeks and then will do a final wrap up of how college housing costs sorted out. 

Let's just say that MM's salary is more than the cost of his tuition and college housing (~$60,000 over 5 years).  The rest of his college expenses were incidental.  Nothing worth noting.  & don't get me wrong, the colleges estimate large amounts of expenses for travel, misc., and things like that.  We found these numbers to be very high in comparison to our frugal tendencies.  MM(23) just rode a bike and took the free bus while living there, things like that.  I'd say that 90% of the time he spent $0 traveling back and forth from school.  I maybe bought him one plane ticket ($100) and a couple of train tickets ($100 per trip).

View from our CA hotel (This is just 2 hours from our home)

Not pictured:  A large hammock I was delighted to lounge in for a chunk of the day.

I can't even remember what prompted this trip, but I was impulsive and booked a mid-week trip to Tahoe.  To the north shore, where I don't think I have been before.  We really enjoyed the trip and the property but it was way too hot (even on cooler days) and they wouldn't let us open windows overnight (on the ground level) because of bear issues.  If we did stay here again, it would just be for a night or two.  We were miserable re: lack of sleep.  

I did google a bit when we got home and I pinpointed a nearby property at a similar price point that had some newer buildings with air conditioning.  & the air conditioning is not necessary whatsoever, but it is if you can't open a window.

View from the CA/NV border

Our stay was near the border of the two states.  

The one trip we had planned this year (but I haven't booked yet) is a weekend in Reno for our anniversary.  We used to spend more time in Reno when we worked with gamblers, but it's probably been about 25 years since I have been there.  

I will do a separate post with some numbers.

Before vacation mode, we were very much in chore mode.  MH replaced the failed tire sensors in my car (a bougie newer car expense, I suppose.  I lived without for 5 months.)  & MM(23) replaced all of the smoke detectors in our house.  The bedrooms had the original detectors from 2001.  We probably pulled out a few too many dead batteries and ripped two of the smoke detectors out when the roof leaked (which caused one to short out).  It was a 'project for MM who had nothing else to do' but it was nice he rushed that through before he left for his job.  (MH and him both did the work but MH wanted to consult with someone with a little more electrical knowledge first.)

I took TM(21) to the music store to put his trombone on consignment.  I applauded him for realizing decades before me, that he will never play his school band instrument again.  But he pointed out me keeping a flute for decades isn't the same as hoarding a large instrument like a trombone.  Fair enough.  I will let him keep the proceeds.  He's thinking of putting the ~$500 towards a guitar.  (In the meantime, my kids have all sorts of hand-me-down or borrowed stringed instruments from MH and my Dad.)

August 4

MM(23) got a job!

We never got around to ‘the talk’ and setting expectations with him.  Though it came up in passing that we expected him to take a job (any job) in September.  Was giving him 3 months to go full force on the job search.  But for the most part, ‘free room and board’ means taking any job in the interim.  We were adjusting our expectations re: the job market, and also MM(23)’s seemingly lackadaisical approach to the job search.  What we didn’t get around to telling him was that we would start charging him rent on January 1.

The job is at a Bay Area start up.  He’s just taking advantage of working where the jobs and innovation are, while being able to secure free room/board with family.  His long-term plan is to settle closer to home.  But I take that with a grain of salt.  He is very young and things change quickly at that age.  Jobs and people come into your life, changing your plans.

MM(23) left for a remote camping trip (with some Bay Area friends) the day after he got the job offer, so I won't see much of him. He starts the job on Monday. I don't know how much of his stuff he will move out at this point. He will be in limbo for a while.

Not-Frugal Things

We had a celebratory dinner out. TM(21) was out doing his own thing, so it was just the three of us.  I was unprepared for the mix of emotions.  Even MM(23) was kind of, “I thought you wanted me out of the house.”  I told him we wanted him financially on his own two feet.  We were just getting used to having him home. But of course we are very happy and excited for him. We need some time to adjust and process.

Everyone is kind of peeling off, back into job land. MH goes back to work in a couple of weeks. TM(21) goes back to work this upcoming week. School starts the last day of the month?

Now we just have to get the GF more employed. *sigh* She has a job but they don't give her many hours. I am hoping that things open up a bit more as high school and college students go back to school and abandon their summer jobs.

Edited to add: Posted this to the 'college' category because you know, the whole point of college was to secure a high paying job. While the topic of college cost is what mostly came up in my blog, 'ease of employment' and starting salary were also very big considerations. The cost/benefit calculation is unreal when it comes to both our alma mater and MM's alma mater. I said a few times, it wasn't about being cheap. It was about the big picture and how little we had to pay for opportunities.

I just started jotting down some things in another place, not expecting the blogs to be down for so long. Catching up...

August 1

Frugal Things

MM(23) cut his own hair today.  He did a really good job. I guess my Dad lent him some fancy scissors.

MM(23) is definitely going for the whole Money Mustache thing.  While I enjoyed some of Money Mustache (put things into words that were in line with our own philosophy and beliefs) I personally never cared much for ‘putting entire life on hold to enjoy later’ aspect of it.  Most particularly when it came to having kids, which was extra important to MH to do at a young age.  & hindsight 20/20 I appreciate taking advantage of my youth on that front.  But we’ve spent MM(23)’s entire life encouraging him to dial it down.  I can see as he becomes an adult, he will be making more of his own choices and maybe doesn’t respect our more balanced life philosophy.  He told me the other day he will live on $20K per year.  He tends to be a little obsessive, and extreme.

Where does TM(21) fall in all this?   I think he’s embraced more of the ‘love your job’ aspect (is okay with working for a few decades) and is a little more on the balanced side.  But he told me the other day ‘no offense’ but he would never buy a ‘big’ house like we have.  His dream/forever home is a condo.  I told him he was preaching to the choir.  Condo living was perfect when it was just the two of us.  I take no offense.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

August 2

Frugal Things

MH & I went to the art museum.  Free, with our membership.  I don’t remember the last time we went, and I suppose I have no record re: no money trail to follow.

TM(21) and the GF went down to the community pool.  It’s a couple of blocks from our house.  Free, with our HOA dues.  The kids had lost interest during teen years, but the GF very much enjoys the amenities by our home (the lake and the pool).  & the nature walks, which we never tired of.  There’s just land to the west of us. 

Not-Frugal Things

TM(21) jumped into the pool with his phone in his pocket.  Oops!

The phone is dead.  He’s pondering a lower tech life.  Both my kids had already taken most the apps off their phones.  Will see where he ends up.

July was amazing.  $4,000 in the green!  That was after posting how much in the red we have been all year.

What’s interesting was that it wasn’t a low-spend month whatsoever.  90% of the battle was not having any expensive emergencies.  Phew!  10% of the battle is being done with MM(23) college expenses.  That is an extra boost.

Will see what August brings.

I might have blogged more about July spending or numbers, but the blogs were down and life has moved on.

Edited to add: We did get the junk hauled and I got rid of two old bikes last weekend. The office chairs were challenging to get rid of but they did eventually get taken.