Monkey Mama*s Monkey Money Blog

July 9
$7 Game
$26 Lunch (Deli + Bakery)
$61 Dinner (Indian Cafe)
Dinner: ~Out~

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

MH found a Game Stop? gift card and picked up a VR game. (I believe this was a birthday gift to MM one full year ago and that we gave him the cash value in exchange for the card). Just a coincidence that MH happened to find or remember about it this week.

My youngest turned 13! Ack!

I think it's pretty certain at this point that MM(15) is the easiest kid on the planet and is never going to be much of a *teenager*. His brother will make up for it. He's been very *teenager* already for two years.

DL(13) didn't want to do anything for his birthday but eat out a lot. MH took the kids out to their favorite deli and stopped by the bakery next door ($2 for 5 pastries?).

For dinner we took him to his favorite Indian Cafe. We were all very happy to have an excuse to eat there. MH left some huge tip that was way out of character. Is not a restaurant (with servers). He told me he wants them to stay in business. Yeah, because handing them a $10 bill twice a year will keep them in business. It's just funny because it was so out of character. & it added significantly to our spending on this day, so is worth noting.

I need to remember to get DL(13) set up with a checking account. There is no rush except that I can automate his allowance when we get this set up. I am very happy about this because it makes our lives simpler.

Edited to add: In the end, DL grew 5 inches this past year. I was surprised. His brother did the same from age 12-13. That is just crazy!

I've been jotting down spending, which is good because I am behind... I will do a few posts today to catch up.

July 8
$33 Groceries
Dinner: Indian Chicken Makhani (crockpot)

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

Not much to report for Sunday.

MH did some grocery shopping and picked up some treats for DL (his birthday is Monday). Because he seemed to have a few dinners already planned and the kids will be gone half the week, I joked that he didn't need to get (more) groceries this week. Right? ... He actually said that might be the case. So might even out a bit from the monster grocery run last weekend. It is what it is. This is the only full month the kids will mostly be home. We usually get more of a reprieve with school lunches. Last month MM was fed for like half the month while he was gone. School starts pretty early in August. So it's mostly this month that I need to feed two teen boys *all month* from the grocery budget.

We watched Titanic, which felt like it took all day. (It did, between that and catching up on the Unspooled podcast). There aren't too many LONG movies, thankfully. I did remember to watch this one in our home movie theater. I usually don't like to utilize and rather just watch a movie on our comfy couch. But since this is more intellectual movie watching than "just for fun" movie watching, I guess I want to get the full experience. I told MH to remind me in the future (as we go through the Top 100 movie list), because I will never remember. Unless it's something epic. It was definitely the right choice to watch Titanic on the big screen with the premium sound.

Next: 2001 Space Odyssey

July 7
$28 Groceries
Dinner: Sloppy Joes

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

In the morning MM volunteered at the animal shelter. It's been more than a year but I've actually never made it out to the library over there before. It's a long drive to the shelter and not worth driving home in between, but usually can find some errands to run. Anyway, today I was able to sit in the car and listen to podcasts and read for about an hour until the library opened. But it was too hot to sit in the car (for 2 full hours) and I had nothing else to do. I went to the library and it was packed! I swear I saw like 30 people in there. But no one was sitting in the cushy chairs they had (about 6 that I saw?) so I sat and read (my library ebook) for a while. The library is only about 2 miles from the shelter, so it's just perfect.

It's nice to see so many people utilizing the library.

On the way home I picked up some groceries. I noticed we were out of milk yesterday, and I wanted to pick up a few other things. I planned to pick up a pound of meat, but it was on sale if you buy more in bulk so I just bought 3 pounds. Same for the pasta I bought.

So... I get home and there is already milk in the fridge. Ack! No idea where it came from. Even worse, I accidentally bought the brand milk. (I don't buy milk very much). I was so focused on getting the correct fat content, that I forgot to look at the price (they all look the same to me). So that was a fail. (MH told me he would make some pudding, and I did use some of the milk to whip up some more pasta, so maybe we will get through it).

The kids were off at a birthday party and MH was working on a movie shoot (it's all volunteer but they do get fed well). So they were all taken care of for dinner. I didn't see much food in the fridge so decided to just make some sloppy joes (old family recipe). It will be nice to have some leftovers.

For the birthday party, it was rather last minute but I had already stocked up on Target gift cards when they were on sale around Christmas time. MM also picked up some food treat for his friend, while we were at the grocery store.

This is DL's best friend who shares the same birthday. I think this is some of why DL is kind of "meh" on the birthday front. Other people's houses/parties are always more fun.

In the end the kids ended up staying at their friend's house overnight (which didn't surprise me at all). So it was a very quiet night in my house.

July 5
$8 Groceries
$12 Indian Grocer
Dinner: Fiesta Chicken Burritos (crockpot)

July 6
$2 Lunch out
$40 Games (4 Party Packs)
Dinner: Cheeseburger Pasta

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

For lunch Thursday, I was feeling kind of ill and nothing sounded good, so just picked up a sandwich at the grocery store. In the end, I didn't like it much. While there I picked up some other groceries (fresh baked bread). I guess MH also picked up some groceries for some meal he hasn't made yet. (Our grocery store is high end and has very fresh food, but the sandwich was a strange bread and they barely put any mayo on it. It was just very dry and not jiving with me).

I ate out again Friday, same deal. The only thing that sounded good to me was a BK burger, and I had to drive about 10 miles (home) to find a decent BK. It was just a bad week. (I spent far more on gas than I did on the burger).

Friday night was DL's night to choose/cook dinner. Cheeseburger Pasta (sort of a casserole) is his favorite meal.

MH participates in some game night group and one time they did some electronic games. I remember MH telling me about it, where you put it up on the big screen somehow, but then everyone can participate with their phones. Anyway, he saw some deal Friday, $40 for something like 20 games. So we tried out the games last night and we had a blast. In this case, he bought them for the playstation and we were able to play along with our cell phones. I am guessing we will end up with just a few favorites, but it's nice to be able to try such a wide variety of games. & because my husband is a bit of a game collector (board games), I told him I appreciated the electronic/non-clutter version.

July 3
$10 pet license renewal
Dinner: Thai chicken

It was MM's night to make dinner. The kids love their dinner nights because they get to choose what to make.

I do have to take my cat to the vet to get his shots updated (usually around $20). I suppose I may have a deadline with the license renewal, but was already planning to update his shots so that we can board him while we do our road trip.

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July 4
$35 Birthday Gifts for MM
Dinner: Steak & Baked Potatoes

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

I mentioned in a recent post that MM didn't want anything for his birthday.

We had played bananagrams at SIL's house and MM seemed to be way into it. So I thought that would at least give him something to open on his birthday. The gift is not necessary, but we have quite a game stash and it wouldn't hurt to add that one to the collection.

In the end, MH also picked up a signed CD from MM's favorite band. They will sign it if you pre-order, something like that. Was another $20. (We won't get it for a couple of months, but can tell him that it is coming).

We did nothing for the holiday, but the kids went to a friend's house where there was a fireworks extravaganza. Definitely not anything I would spend my money on (I think setting off fireworks in our climate/region is completely dumb and insane, but it's what people do. So the kids' youth will be full of pyromania. We are happy to sit it out now that they are old enough to go off on their own. In addition, MH is hard of hearing so he just does not enjoy on any level).

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I saw this video the other day and it was amazing:

https://www.facebook.com/dearalyne/videos/194488441235252/

I've not paid too much attention to the "pink tax" talks because I don't even buy most female products to begin with.

Well, this video starts talking about razors. I've never bought the female razors because I just didn't like them. I don't know if price factored. Maybe. (I made this decision like 20 years ago, so I don't remember). & I do sometimes buy men's clothing. I have more man-sized feet, if nothing else.

Anyway, I watched the video and it blew my mind. I really need to start thinking more carefully about everything I buy. I don't even like pink! So why would I pay a premium to buy something pink? I told MH that I was embarrassed that I recently bought a big old thing of pink shaving cream. I feel somewhat *shrugs* about it because was a luxury I never purchased during our one-income years (just used soap or shampoo) and the one large bottle of shaving cream will probably last me something like 5 years. I will survive for paying that few extra dollars. I can see that I should probably stop buying girly foo foo deoderant. I just think it's good to be mindful and will think more carefully through these things as I make future purchases.

July 2
$6 lunch
$27 birthday gift (DL)
$60 Flea meds
$173 groceries
Dinner: Crockpot Chili

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

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Not a frugal day, whatsoever. MH and MM did go to a free movie screening.

**I've been eating out lunch more with co-workers, which I mostly had not done since one-income years. I think mostly they used to eat at the same place every day and it was expensive. I'd maybe go once in a blue moon. Now they mostly eat junk food (??) after that place shut down? (I probably feel the opposite now, that I don't want to eat junk).

Anyway, with all the upheaval at work, there have been a lot of lunches out. On the flip side, my one lunch buddy has been busy and MH has been busy so I am just moving my lunch dollars over to be more work focused. I mostly join them for $2 tacos on Tuesday. But my co-worker had been gone on a long trip and I wanted to hear all about it yesterday.

**I did also order some flea meds online. That's a new thing. I've never battled fleas with indoor pets before. *sigh*

When I got home, the fridge was pretty bare, so I presumed MH did a light grocery run. HA! $173 is probably the biggest grocery run I have ever seen. I have no idea what he stocked up on. But this is the one full month the kids are home and I am sure he stocked up on food and bought some extra food/treats.

**MH also picked up a birthday gift for DL. He has been asking for a pull up bar.

Usually it seems we don't plan much for the kids' birthdays and then something more extravagant always seems to come up last minute.

Will see... For now, we have about 5 days until birthday #1 and both kids are saying they don't want anything and they don't want to do anything for their birthdays. Both their birthdays are next week.

In the end, DL did ask for a pull up bar specifically. MH never wants anything and so we usually aim more for experiences for him. I have been thinking that we will take him rock climbing. He LOVES climbing and maybe it's time we get him some more opportunities on that front. At the least, will take him once, but might think about getting him more of a membership or into classes.

MM = Monkey Monkey. It's just not been a priority to-date, but I can't imagine anything he would want more than more opportunities to do some sort of rock climbing.

**I've got DL's passport in hand already. It only took 2 weeks. I had been dreading that chore, but in the end our city had opened up a new passport center (since the last time we needed passports) that is open 6 days per week. Phew!

I did not get MM's passport renewed, because if we can wait until he is 16 then he won't have to renew in person after that.

**I haven't done any credit card rewards (one-time bonuses) this year because it's been so much chaos.

In the end, we are planning a very simple/frugal road trip for the end of this month. It's only in the last week or so, as it seems to be coming together, that I thought I should try to get the cost down with rewards. I'd be more inclined to save that for a bigger and more expensive trip, but am realizing I am not planning any big/expensive trips in the foreseeable future. & who knows if this reward will even be around in another few years? So, might as well take advantage.

We used the Capital One Venture card for our Europe trip last year, and that seems to be the best bet for a road trip. Will have $500 of our hotel expenses paid for. So I made sure to apply for that card on Monday and should receive it any day. The other reason I chose this card is because it will work with the more last minute plans.

July 1
$10 Parking @ Water Park
$0 Movies
$0 Library books
Dinner: Parmesan Pasta & Mediterranean Salad

Note: Just tracking spending. Not attempting to cut expenses or to be uber frugal.

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For whatever reason, was thinking of tracking spending this month (er, sharing in the blogs. I always track spending). Life has been crazed and I don't even remember why I was thinking that, except for maybe a bit of a reset.

I didn't even realize it was UFM month. I guess that is extra motivation.

{I don't generally participate in UFM and don't want to upset our delicate balance. But the way I participate is by sharing our spending. I will put some kind of disclaimer on my posts}.

I am also putting these in the "one-income" category since MH doesn't work during the summer months.

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I had bought premium season passes to our local water park around the time of Black Friday. About 50% off current prices.

The catch is that we had to process our season passes at this location, and ideally before the Fair starts. (I personally bought my season pass more for another location).

So we took care of that yesterday. It was a pretty horrible trip for us adults (especially because I wasn't feeling well and it was crazy hot). But, the kids had fun. (We maybe stood in lines for an hour, and then the kids spent an hour on the slides. It wasn't that crowded but they were just that inefficient. Security was slow. Season passes were slow. Ugh). I could see MH being more moody about the whole thing, since he is the one who will be taking the kids on weekdays and generally doesn't do *sun*, but he seemed impressed with how cheap the passes were. (The way to his heart is through a good deal?).

I also ended up getting a free meal while we were there. MH got me something because I was so miserable, and we thought it might help. So we went through all the coupons we got (x4) and I chose whatever was cheap. (I mean, it's all junkie food I wasn't that enthralled with to begin with). In the end, they refused to let MH pay. HA! Told him he had some kind of meal card. He argued with them a bit, but then figured he doesn't know what the heck I bought. I told him 100% I did not buy or get any meal cards. So he decided to go check with customer service and see what the heck. Because if our meals were really supposed to be free then he was getting the kids some free food.

I guess it's early in the season. Everything was just kind of very slow and was chaos. In the end, we were not supposed to get a free meal. The free food put us in a better mood though.

After that, I slept for several hours. I just hadn't been feeling well, and have some other medical issues in addition to having some kind of bug yesterday.

When I woke up, I was craving some pasta recipe I saw online earlier. We had everything on hand (though our fridge was mostly bare otherwise). I asked MH what he was planning to make for dinner, and it was actually something similar. He was fine with me taking over dinner. Everyone liked it. I didn't have a quick/easy creamy pasta dish before. Now I have one:

https://damndelicious.net/2014/10/11/one-pot-garlic-parmesan...

Other than that, I've been reading. I might have to finish my library (ebook) tonight. It's due back any second.

We watched the French Connection last night. That one was pretty weird. Every movie we watch leads to like 5 more movies to watch. Anyway, MH told me I had to watch the commentary track. I think he bought this one at the used store ($0 cash out of pocket ~ used his credit). We didn't realize until after that it was based on a true story. Anyway, there are not enough hours in the day and I have had to let it all go. But maybe I can squeeze in this one commentary. Especially because I got like a 10 day break from the movies and I have Wednesday off work.

Titanic is next on the list, which is one of my favorite movies. Probably one of the very few I have actually seen.

I want to do a more general update too. Will see... I think overall less chaos this week. Except for my medical stuff, everything is kind of calm right now. (Knock on wood).

We did our annual family camp trip last week (3 nights). It was DIVINE.

Since then... Ugh!

These are the words I wrote a couple of posts ago:
I feel like NOTHING is going to be easy about this year. *sigh*

Was emotionally exhausted between work mess/health issues/kid's mental health, etc.

That said, I guess stuff on the work front had leveled out a bit. & in particular the, "everyone is dying/seriously ill" stuff. We maybe had a quiet month.

Anyway, I came home to learn:

--My mom had fallen and had to call 9-1-1.

My dad is leaving all the month of July. Which is common (for him to be constantly traveling) but I feel odds are higher that I may have a freakout this time and may drive 100 miles at some point to make sure my mom is okay.

--My sister's health issues seem to be catching up to her.

--Long-term neighbor's 50yo daughter has terminal cancer and just a few months to live. Her 80-something parents are taking care of her in the meantime. Seemed very backwards. (Parents' neighbors ~ she was my babysitter).

--Family friend (who is a total mess) was rushed to the ER in an ambulance, due to chest pains. (He's been a complete mess, regardless. Is dying of cancer. Just more crap for him to deal with).

Oh, and it never really occurred to me anything worse could happen at work, but it did... *sigh* Returned to horrible news. Have to be cryptic for now, but trust me, was horrible. (Is more medical/black cloud stuff, though is of course affecting work situation).

I actually started to type up this post with that info. Little did I know how much worse it could get...

Since then:

MH went to LA over the weekend (which was the silver lining in all this. He has a lot of interest in his script and submitted to one movie studio. You can't submit without a referral, so will consider this a win).

We need some GOOD news!

Supposedly many others were interested and he may get other referrals in the future.

Anyway, DL has been so moody that I just decided to take him out of town this past weekend to distract him. (His mental health bottomed out with MM gone a few weeks ago, and he gets the same way when MH is gone). In the end, the weather was horribly hot and I felt my parents needed me (and their city is much cooler, weather-wise), so the reasons seem to compound. We did have a nice weekend.

--While at my parents' house, their neighbor with cancer passed suddenly.

--Monday night my mom called me to say family friend (the one rushed to the hospital last week) had fallen and no one had found him for FOUR days. HORRIBLE. He is okay, and doing well as can be considering.

--Tuesday night I Was driving home from work and someone slammed into me on the freeway. ??? I didn't see them until about a couple of seconds before they hit me. Logically, they were just hitting cars for kicks. I don't know. Or they were just driving crazy recklessly.

{I was driving full speed on the freeway and absolutely no one was in front of me. Like 5 lanes, so plenty of room to go around. They hit me so squarely it seems to be no accident}.

I didn't really have time to process, but they took off, which is probably for the best. (I can't say I would have pulled over to exchange info in that situation. I probably should have been scared out of my mind, but I didn't have time to be scared before they took off).

The whole thing was traumatic and horrible, but given the week we have had, I can keep it in perspective. If that's my "once every couple of decades" car accident, then I got off lucky.

I edited this down because of the situation. But the short version is that the other vehicle left a perfectly clear license plate imprint on my bumper, so the CHP took a report and documented the evidence. (I thought being in a big city and having no details or witnesses, that I'd probably have to filed an online report. But given the "hit and run" aspect, I called the police first, and by then had figured out I had a license plate imprint).

My first car was rear ended many many times, in my teens/20s, usually when I was not in the car. So it's a similar situation. I don't have full insurance because the vehicle is pretty old and worthless (Same as my car back then). But the damage is probably just cosmetic. Even if I can track down insurance information for the offender, I have to take care of it myself (most likely). Which has never been any big deal the many times I did this with cooperative parties. But in this case, not really sure what I am getting into and how it works. I will get the police report (will take some weeks) and check with my insurance company, etc. But I am guessing I have to take care of filing a claim with the other insurance, if they even have insurance. I am guessing we won't fix the bumper. But our mechanic also does body work and we will make sure it's safe and just cosmetic damage.

So that was my week post vacation... *sigh*

I know this is completely random, but there are a lot of writers around here.

Is this correct grammar?

The unlikely duo pursues their only lead.

MH got a note that this should be:
The unlikely duo pursue their only lead.

I am his unofficial editor, but looking this up is giving me a headache (especially because I only have a few minutes). I think that probably sounds right, but no one giving him notes is a grammar expert by any means. (I am more of a human spell checker).

TIA!

Trying to blog more, and miserably failing. I am trying to break this one down into two blog posts to break it up a bit.

MH, MM and I went to a free movie screening last week.

MH got a free pass to Ocean's 8. We missed the free screening but plan to go today.

I have to go through the Wizard of Oz again. No idea when, but maybe will have time while MH is gone next weekend. I was trying to make a pierogi recipe and it took much longer than I expected and I more half listened to the movie. I realize I need to sit down and really watch the movie. I overall LOVED it though.

I've never baked much when it comes to (homemade) dough. I actually had MH pause the movie a couple of times so that I could look up dough making on Youtube. I thought, "How did we survive before the internet?" I guess I'd be asking someone's mom to help me. I have done a wee bit of dough/baking before but is usually quite a mess. In this case I started with, "What was I thinking!?" & ended up with round pierogie dough and some confidence. Phew! I never did end up making any home made pizza dough, and so I am putting that next on my list. I also have a samosa recipe that looked way too involved, but the first thing I thought was I could totally do a samosa. After doing the pierogis. Same idea, different fillings.

Oh, and I did need a cookie cutter for this recipe. I decided just to measure the cups we already have, and I had the right size. That was my frugal victory. I love a useful kitchen tool, but try to avoid single-taskers if at all possible. I was determined to find something around the house; it didn't take long. I had some plastic cups with 5" openings, that were perfect for cutting dough into round shapes.

Yesterday we watched Swing Time. Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers. I liked it.

The theme from these early movies seems to be how poorly the female lead actresses were treated. Ugh!

Next on the (Top 100) List: The French Connection. (Watching along with a Podcast, but they are not going in order). I get a movie reprieve for the next 10 days or so. With MH gone next weekend, we probably won't watch that one until the following week.

One other thing we do on the entertainment front is try to see more lesser known/up-and-coming acts. Not only is it a lot cheaper, but is also always a much better experience. For example, MH saw the Lumineers open up for one of our favorite artists at a little restaurant. This was right before they hit it big. I think I missed the first time they headlined locally, but MH took me (to a small club) the second time they came around and they were already clearly very frustrated by how crowded the venue was. They wanted to come out into the audience, and tried, but it just wasn't working well. I can not even fathom seeing them in a large stadium or how they must feel about that!

So anyway, though I took DL to the Symphony recently and it was absolutely *amazing*, it was also quite expensive. I don't know why I haven't been paying too much attention to it, but the art museum (we are members) has concerts for $8. I guess one of the performances caught my eye. For reference, the tickets are $10 or $12 to see anything at DL's art school. I just paid $10 per head just to see his spring vocal performance (which was totally amazing; talk about up-and-coming talent). But it just hit me that seeing some of these art museum concerts is cheaper than a student concert! I need to pay more attention in the future.

Edited to add: Don't waste your money on Ocean's 8. Glad we didn't pay for that one.

I feel like NOTHING is going to be easy about this year. *sigh*

MM(15) is always charmed, and his 8-day river rafting trip went GREAT! They did an expensive tour (he went with my dad) and they had a blast.


That said, DL(13) had already been pretty moody in recent weeks and was very stressed about finals. He pretty much completely fell apart with his brother being gone AND finals. UGH! I am hoping things settle down a bit now that school is done for summer and his brother is back. (So far so good...). He had otherwise gone 18 months without any episodes.

On top of all that, I have some medical issues. We are just watching things and seeing what to do next. (I don't think anything major, but who knows). Just female stuff, or mostly TMI. But this is just adding to my emotional exhaustion of late.

Work is as weird as it ever was. I don't really know anything more than my last post on the subject. *sigh* I've been very much in 9-5 mode, especially with endless doctor appointments and so on.

MH is done with work for summer. Phew! I can't even fathom him working full-time right now. That is very much on the back burner, for now. Original plan for him to work part-time another 12 months? We are back to that. {Back in January: 18 months + completely job uncertainty, I wasn't so sure about}. But knowing that I at least have a job, and that we are only facing 12 more months on our original timeline... Is all good. He's been working the equivalent of full-time lately anyway, and it's been pretty traumatic on our household. (Maybe working 35+ hours at job +12 hours on movie set. Sometimes more, so I guess it's just been a lot).

On Friday the kids were whisked off to some last minute party. We were both completely exhausted, as we settled back into some sort of normalcy. DL had his last final Thursday, and MM came home that day. Anyway, I wanted to just go out and have a nice dinner. My expectations were low on a Friday night. But I still have tons of gift cards we never used. So we went to Seasons 52 and just completely pigged out. I ordered Prosecco. We ordered several appetizers. The restaurant can be hit or miss, but was *so good* on Friday. The waiter even commented we must like the food because we completely cleared our plates. I don't know how often we splurge on dinners like that and it's kind of "meh". I mean, it's not often. But I think it's that much more disappointing when you have saved up a very long time for a treat. I guess I should say that more often than not, these things end up being kind of "meh". So we really enjoyed having such an amazing meal. I had a $50 gift card, so we ate like a $100 meal with that. $50 out of pocket. Made it easier to splurge.

So I mentioned in my last post that we were watching the Top 100 movies (AFI) along with a new podcast called 'Unspooled'. I was really skeptical about my long-term participation. We watched Citizen Kane (#1) and that was okay. Certainly very relevant in this day and age. But I was dreading the second movie (#100), Ben Hur. It's almost 4 hours long! Anyway, in the end, I surprisingly enjoyed it. I don't even know if I can tell you why. I just wasn't bored at all though I expected it to be quite boring. The plot was predictable and the acting was "meh", but I guess it was just all so grand. There was certainly some incredible highlights, like the boat/slave scenes and the Chariot race. I guess every movie race ever pulls from that one race. & I also noticed the music sounded a heck of a lot like Star Wars. Star Wars is clearly very much inspired by Ben Hur. The downside to all the discussions is that you want to watch like 5 more movies for every one movie you see. Since I've committed to watch one classic movie every week, will just have to let it go. There are only so many hours in a day! But I can tell you that I think I will enjoy this more than I thought I would. Citizen Kane was a little harder to get through. But Ben Hur was entertaining and really opened my eyes to how much it influenced future cinema. (After watching Ben Hur, 1959 version, I'd be interested to see the earlier silent version which everyone mostly says is better, and the more recent version ~ 2016? Also, Life of Brian might be fun to watch again, as it was mentioned how much it pulls from Ben Hur. & on and on and on).

Today we watch the Wizard of Oz. This will be one of the very few (Top 100) movies that I have seen before. It's on Amazon Prime right now.

I guess if there is a theme to this year, it's going to be "culture", for my household. I do think I will be attending the Symphony more this year. I received an incredible deal on the last musical we went to because I had liked the event or page on Facebook. So I made sure to "like" every musical production I was interested in this year. Will see... & now we are doing this movie project.

So far, most of these movies we are borrowing from the library. (Er, we borrowed Citizen Kane from in-laws' cable, but I guess the library was an option for that one). MH is usually pretty picky about film format, but he likes the DVD option because they do come with a lot of extras usually. We didn't watch any extras after the 4-hour movie.

**I mentioned in my last post that I am taking a staycation of sorts this week. I guess since everyone else in my house has so much fun stuff planned (later), and I am long overdue for a break, I am just focusing on some small splurges this week. I picked up a few treats at the grocery store. I will probably go out to lunch today, etc.

**On Monday we dropped MM(14) off with my parents. He is going on a long river rafting trip with my dad.

He finished school last week. He usually has school well into June. So they might have gone on this trip last year, but when I pointed out how much earlier he gets out this year (public high school), they decided to wait. Is already pushing it as far as crazy hot weather in the Grand Canyon, but May beats June or July.

We spent $200 getting supplies for the trip, as I expected. & some of the items, like sunglasses and swim trunks, he can use beyond just the one trip. He's otherwise roughly the same size as MH. That makes it easier to buy higher end sporting gear, if I know we might use it again in the future. Mostly, he just needed proper shoes and some high quality rain gear. He needed a sweatshirt for this trip and I just gave him one of mine.

**MH just booked a June trip to LA to try and get a script sold. He was able to get a free timeshare stay (even though it was rather last minute) and will just drive, so is just a small blip on my financial radar.

**DL(13) is cashing in his raincheck for his 10th birthday trip. MIL took all her grandkids "anywhere in the world" on their 10th birthday. DL decided he was only 10 and wasn't interested. MH's family has been very melodramatic about this. OMG. I am just like, "He's 10." Or, "He's 11." I was quite sure he would come around with a little age and maturity. & trust me, we've told him not to pass up an opportunity like this. But MIL is one of those people that pushes and pushes and pushes, which usually has the complete opposite effect on people. So I was trying to buffer that as much as possible, because otherwise he would never go.

In the end, maybe because he is a bit older, he choose the most exotic destination of all the kids: Finland. They are planning for that trip in the fall. He's just always wanted to live there. & we've probably told him 100 times to use this opportunity to see if he actually likes it there. It's in the past few months that he has decided that he is ready.

I just dug out passports over the weekend because MM was was flying to Arizona. (He's a minor, but he looks 20. I figured it was best to have some proper ID on him). The kids' passports (just) expired and of course we have to renew in person. UGH! It was the most painful experience last time. I will just renew them both together (again), and then we never have to do that again.

With MH being so busy, I am completely exhausted. What a month!

I have this week off, but haven't had any time to process that. So, I feel rather "meh" about it. Work was surprisingly quiet last week, which I guess is some of it. Almost any other week this year I probably would have been in more, "Get me out of here" mode. I planned this as just a mental health break. Is unpaid time off (spurred by change in business ownership).

Anyway, we shipped MM off yesterday, for his river rafting trip with my dad. We spent most of yesterday stuck in a horrible traffic jam. UGH.

I am also kind of bummed that everyone in my house is so busy. But I decided to go to the coastline by myself for one or two days this week. That sounds DIVINE! I have no idea what I will end up doing, but I am jotting down notes to drag MH with me on some weekend when he is done with work for the summer. (I've crossed off a couple of things I'd rather wait for MH to do).

I am starting to think I may just go to San Francisco for the day. At the least, will go to the beach and my favorite restaurant (in SF). Which by itself is probably all I need. But while there, I am thinking about going to the zoo or the art museum. Is just going to depend on my mood that day. I am definitely just going to wing it.

The other thing I realized I need to make sure to make time for is some pool/sun time. Is really my only goal for today. I am going to get some gas (cheap/small gas station; will go while it's not busy). I am going to buy some groceries (we need a few things and MH didn't have time, but I also want to buy some treats. It will be a very small grocery run). I will check gas buddy because it just depends on the day which gas station is cheaper. I think the grocery store may be the same price (gas) today, and in that case might as well not drive around so much.

It's going to be pretty hot today, so I won't go to the pool until late afternoon.

That's about it for my plans today. As I get more into vacation mode, I will probably look up some books to check out from the library (I would love any recommendations) and I may work on my knitting. All of the above is usually stuff I have/make time for. I am viewing this week as a chance to hit the reset button. This year has just not been very "balanced" with us both being so busy/stressed on the work front.

Oh, and I forgot one more thing. MH mentioned some podcast (Unspooled) where they watch and discuss the AFI's Top 100 movies. A lot of classics that he has never seen. I told him in theory that sounds nice, but I am never able to keep up with all the movies he watches. & I don't generally like what a time suck movies are. (I am not a movie person, and he is THE movie person. I do like movies. But I am just generally good with like once per month, whereas MH will watch a movie every single day). But... it's summer and whatever, I can give it a go. So we are going to watch #1 Citizen Kane tonight. I think we decided that we will watch the movies together and just do the podcasts on our own time. He wants to keep up and watch one movie every week. Will see... I am not very optimistic about my long-term participation.

I'll ask him later how he acquired Citizen Kane. I don't remember. But I wouldn't be surprised if he owns like half the movies already. & we are generally able to watch movies for free because he has credits to rent (through Amazon/Vudu, etc.). & for more difficult movies to find, I know he's bought used and sold back in the past. So, as we go along I will try to remember to share how we participate frugally.

Edited to add: Most these movies are at our library.

I did two posts of work updates. I am ready to look forward and to talk about something else!

I kind of have no idea where we stand financially. We are definitely in "too busy to spend money" mode and in the usual "hoarding money" zone that we start every year off with. Usually MH's work is more slow in the spring but he's been busy.

Anyway, I usually eat out a bit more during my busy work season. Not a ton, but I figure if I go out one day per week it's covered by OT. Except in this case I am working more hours than ever but I am not getting compensated for the extra time. So that is the part I don't really know and am not sure of. I guess next weekend I can sort out April and see where we are at. I told MH that I don't think I have been spending any more money than usual, but it's just I am not entirely sure how to pay for the "Stress spending." If it will come out of his paycheck, or savings, or what.

In addition, I have been indulging in some bigger splurges. Definitely a feeling of "I deserve this," after months of working so hard. In this case, we don't have any vacation plans, and so might start tapping the vacation fund. It would be our "normal" to use it for treats that we can't otherwise justify, or more staycation-y type stuff. Our traveling the last few years has been unusual for us.

Splurges:

--I got front row seats to the symphony in a couple of weekends. Just DL and I are going. That was crazy expensive. If we have a great time and want to go back again in the future, we don't have to sit so close next time. Definitely a special treat.

--Robogames (robot battles) is in a couple of weekends. This is my absolutely favorite thing. It is SO FUN! So I am very excited about that. I thought we'd bring some friends and this might get expensive (if we are covering driving, lunch, dinner, tickets). But it looks like it will just be the four of us. Regardless, it will be pricey but I will pull from vacation budget or MH's paycheck. Is probably only $100 for tickets, but last time we bought some beer and food there, and we will probably want to go out for a meal or two that day.

--I got tix to see the Beach Boys in September at an awesome venue. There is a winery in the Bay Area that I've seen some great concerts at. It's maybe been 5+ years (10 years?) since we have seen any shows there. The lineup hasn't been that exciting the last couple of years that we checked. This year!? OMG! So many good shows. MH was "meh" on all the weeknight shows. Having no idea what is going on with my job, I agreed we should just stick to weekends. This left Steve Martin/Martin Short (which sold out in like 5 seconds) and the Beach Boys. I am glad I was able to get the Beach Boy tickets for the whole family.

I've also got piles of dining out gift cards to get through. Was thinking that DL and I might go to P.F. Chang's before the symphony.

I still owe my dad his birthday dinner at Benihana. We had plans in January, but the restaurant shut down that day and canceled our reservation due to "technical difficulties." Seriously! Maybe we can try again during the next few weeks. (I have gift cards for this).

It's good to have some fun stuff to look forward to.

Just tracking my gift cards. Not *all* credit card rewards, but most of them are.


GIFTS:
------
$ 20 x5 Target


MOVIES:
--------

RESTAURANTS:
------------
$25 Red Lobster


RETAIL:
---------
$100 Staples ($50x2)**School supplies next summer?**
$200 Home Depot ($50x4) **need taller ladder**
$75 Kohls ($50 + $25) **to replace kids' shoes?**


Note: Edited over time to remove used gift cards.

**MH saw some noise cancelling headphones on Amazon for 90% off. He figured what the heck. In the end I guess it was a pricing mistake because they canceled the order.

**MH is still looking for the right blu ray player for the TV we bought 9 months ago. In the end he saw another "too good to be true" deal for $25. I guess this was at Walmart. In the store it didn't show the advertised price (85% off) and they seemed to think he was crazy when he inquired, but it rang up for $25.

He hadn't picked one up before because he was being crazy picky. I got the sense this had everything he wanted, but maybe also willing to settle a bit in the interim because nothing to lose at that price. In the end, it seemed to have some problems and they were out of stock by then (couldn't exchange) but he diagnosed that he needed a better cable and it seems fine now.

So I thought he was 0 for 2, but maybe this one will work out. He is going to give it some time.

**My cell phone is almost 4 years old and I was targeting all along to replace this spring (at the 4 year mark). Given work uncertainty, I asked MH yesterday to keep an eye out. I told him I probably rather get used to a new phone before I am more seriously job searching. & I'd rather buy a phone while I have a (high paying) job. So he will start looking around for me.

My phone is mostly fine but has admittedly been wonky for about 18 months. It is not secure as I am sure it is no longer receiving updates, so that is my main concern. It turns off randomly at times (but I don't use enough for it to matter). MH saved it from a "black screen of death" about a year ago. I know his tech skills have helped me to keep it the 4 years that everyone else seems to think is crazy and impossible. But even MH has been nagging me a bit as he knows I no longer receive security updates. I was dead set on 4 years because I had paid $400 for it. I can be okay with 3 years and 10 months.

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I usually file taxes early, before I have tax forms. Because I don't need the tax forms. But I peruse the tax forms as they come in and make sure they agree to my records.

In the end, my mortgage company reported that I paid more interest than I did. ??? It's the only tax form mistake I ever recall catching. I double checked their website and their monthly interest amounts (2017) matched mine, so I will ignore the tax form. It was in my favor so I won't worry about it. If it went the other way I would make sure that they correct it.

I plan to file taxes today. Our software at work hadn't been updated yet. I talked to the person in charge of that yesterday and she seemed confused, but we finally decided she was out Friday and hadn't followed up on our weekly updates. (They should get done regardless, but she usually makes sure that they are done). She got it updated ASAP when she realized we couldn't file *any* tax returns yet. It was a hectic day/week, so will just press the "send" button when I get to work today. I knew I had all sorts of tax forms in the mail (in route or sitting in mail box) and figured I better check those first.

I did well with harvesting tax gains for kids. I always strategically harvest tax gains at 0% tax rate. But this year I squeaked by with harvesting tax gains and not even having to file a tax return for them. I don't know how realistic that goal is as their investments grow, but works for now.

We did end up eating lunch at the culinary school.

$30 for all that (salmon, shrimp, and steak sandwich), plus dessert.



I was surprised they were open (so early in the semester). Any other time we've gone is just like any restaurant. But it was so obviously their first day for this group of students. They all looked like deer in headlights. The second appetizer we tried to order was burned so they couldn't serve it. It added some layer of fun/amusement to the whole thing, but the food was still GREAT! We were the only ones there. Ha! I would absolutely go back on their first day, though it's all a little more smooth after that. (In the past it's been hard to get reservations; it does fill up).

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Well, it's time for me to figure out the next phase. Things at work aren't good and the writing is on the wall. My employer is *amazing* but I always knew this day would come because is a small employer of retirement age.

While I am planning for the worst case, I did initially feel like I may have some more months of job security. MH and I had decided to take our time and to be choosy. We will both be looking for work. In an ideal world, we would have had one more year! Until MM(14) is driving and the kids are more independent. (At that point MH was going to look for full-time work anyway). But I honestly never expected to have this job for so long. I am thankful that I did have it for this long, because this was really the ideal job as to raising kids. I was paid a full-time/high level salary to really work what is considered more part-time hours in my industry. At this point my kids are mostly grown. (At the least, daycare is no longer a concern at all).

I initially thought I would have more time and we decided to take this time to be choosy. Was expecting some measure of job stability through April. As of Friday, feeling more turmoil about the whole thing. I am hoping to have more clarity soon. But I have already reached out to a recruiter and identified a "dream job" of sorts that I doubt will pay very well but otherwise fits all my bullet points. I like the idea of interviewing for such an exciting job opportunity while I am in a strong negotiating position. It would be more of a stepping stone. I think we both kind of have nowhere to go but up. For MH in particular. But for me, if I step down a bit, it would be thinking to more long-term opportunities and growth.

The local economy has been pretty horrible most the years we have lived here. I am happy to say I have NEVER seen so many jobs. It's completely absurd. So though I feel some amount of post traumatic stress from MH's last layoff (2001) and MH's long-term unemployment, I do recognize that this is a completely different situation. The job outlook is good for both of us.

Financially I feel surprisingly *shrugs* about this. I suppose this is our WHY. We don't live below our means just because we like to feel deprived or whatever. The way we dealt with MH's unemployment was absolutely priceless. We did not sweat at all the first 3+ years. We *shrugged* and ended up being some of the best times of our life. MH was home with me during my maternity leaves; those are some of my fondest memories. We are in a similar position now, except with substantially more assets. Money worries aren't on my mind whatsoever at this moment in time.

The only non-negotiable I have is that I want to get DL(12) through high school here (5.5 more years). That's it. His school is phenomenal. While the economy was down, I always knew I could mega commute to the Bay Area (more jobs with higher pay). Or we could sell our home and live off the proceeds for several years. Neither of these options were ideal, but it helped me to sleep well at night. I guess having my pick of jobs that may pay slightly less sounds kind of like a dream in comparison. & I am not set on that route. I am open to anything. Just to be clear. I may push myself to secure a higher paying/higher stress job with the idea that I only need to do this until MH gets some better career footing.

Financially I am *shrugs* but emotionally I am a bit of a wreck. I am mourning the loss of my job. It's been such a big part of my life for so long. Most the employees have been there longer than I have. Plus, what else in my life have I ever done for 16 years?? Holy cow! I am actually somewhat excited about the next phase and future opportunities, but I just notice it feels like dealing with a death. I am sure that part will take some time to work through.

Current plan:

This weekend I am getting a haircut (is overdue), do our taxes (while I have access to work software), updating my resume, etc.

We turned off MH's 401k contributions and will be hoarding cash like crazy.

If I go MIA for a bit, my work is CRAZED and I have a list of chores a mile long re: job searching.

I should have added this to my last post, but forgot.

The turkeys usually come out in the spring. Not used to seeing them in winter. I just happened to walk by the front door (office) and saw a turkey peering in the glass door. They look HUGE when they get that close. I was on the way to the kitchen (opposite end of building), but turned around to go the other way to get my camera. By the time I got back they were moving on, but I think I startled them and the one fanned its feathers.





Probably some of the best pictures I've gotten of the office turkeys.

The last time I tracked spending in my blog was a February and I noted it was way too busy. I felt *shrugs* about it during a potentially busier month (this year), during the first couple of weeks, but I think I hit a wall the middle of last week.

I always track spending (just not in my blog) and can still share some bigger picture spending:

--Grocery spending is up to $355 out of $650 for the month. We still will probably do 2 more weekly grocery runs x $100.

Note: Grocery budget covers household/pet food and litter

--Fuel is at $125 for the month. Includes two out-of-town drives so far this month. I need to fill up the van this week.

We were going to go to the Bay Area next weekend, but that's been postponed. Overall, our trade-off to moving and saving $500k-ish on home (purchase price) is some extra driving. I've not noticed it so much in recent years as we get more settled into our city and kids in particular have their own things. But we do still end up with months like this where we drive out of town every weekend. Some of it is family stuff, and some of it is still being able to take advantage of everything the Bay Area has to offer, without having to live there. & some of it is that we prefer weekend trips around the state more than longer/farther vacations (re: last weekend in Napa).

{Side note: We have two very cheap gas stations by our home; cheaper than Costco. I had stumbled across a comparably-prices gas station that I have filled up at while MM is volunteering. I drove by that gas station last night and it was $3.25 per gallon!! Versus the $2.79 by our home. I am not 100% sure but I am pretty sure that was the cheap gas station I stopped at before. I guess it is not always cheap}.

Other Spending:

$10 gymnastics
$20 Round table pizza (used $5-off coupon)

Round table raised their prices, but I guess the coupons help to offset. Oh, and we never order food delivery. In this case, I picked it up: faster and cheaper.

Other doings:

MH was sick much of last week, and probably is why I felt thrown into the void of busy.

Friday he was starting to feel better and we did go out to the movies for his birthday ($0 out-of-pocket). I believe he also went to the movie another day last week. Probably would have been more movies out if he felt better.

MH got word that he has an additional week off of work (after being stuck working 3 weeks longer than usual). Phew! Because he hadn't been feeling well and I was wary I'd end up with whatever he had, we delayed our fancy lunch out (with credit card reward). We will do that this week, since he is still available for lunch.

While we were out eating GREAT food last weekend, MH mentioned the culinary school. They have a restaurant which is DIVINE (& very cheap) but I doubt we have eaten there since MH has been working. Is only open for lunch a couple of days a week and it's a class so they need time to develop their menu and so on. I never in a million years thought they'd be open this month (new semester), but MH got reservations for this week! We will eat *very well* this week. (Though I wouldn't be surprised if this was opening week for this group of students, so I won't have high expectations).

Saturday:

I worked all day Saturday. MH took MM to the animal shelter for his volunteer shift. & then he spent the rest of the day working on some movie set. (Free labor in exchange for networking and experience).

Sunday:

MH went off to San Francisco to see a show. We paid for it last month. His one friend bailed and owes him $30-ish for the ticket (neither of us cares at all). I mean, he said he wants to pay him back, but I'd rather he did not. He's a young college student trying to get through college with no debt. MH's other friend (script writing partner) did reimburse him AND insisted on paying for MH's dinner because his birthday was last week. Other than that, MH did spend $13 taking a train, to avoid hassles/traffic and parking fees. He still had to drive one hour to the train, but this makes the other end of the trek easier.

{Between this and birthday money, I won't need to go to ATM for a while to get more gymnastics money. I pulled the last $20 out of my stash last week, but I know we both have some cash in our wallets. I only seem to need to go to the ATM once every 3 months.
This is probably more efficient because I used to always run any cash to our credit union to deposit. Now I just keep a cash stash and replenish it as needed}.

I ran kids around to friend's houses, stopped by the grocery store, and made dinner. Did some laundry, etc. Relaxed most of the day, but just busier than usual.

January 15
$7 Groceries
$10 Gymnastics
Dinner: Chile Colorado Burritos

MH told me what he picked up at the grocery store Monday, but I don't remember. Maybe something for dinner? Ran out of milk? Something like that.

I just double checked all credit cards and nothing else is showing up. Resort charged (was pending before) have completely disappeared. Will keep an eye on it and see what they end up charging us.

The kids had the day off (I did not) and they played the borrowed (library) game. Is supposed to be a single-use kind of game, which is why MH borrowed it.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

January 16
$100 Groceries
$36 Allowance Purchase (MH)
Dinner: Lasagna

MH told me that instead of buying used movies (hit and miss if he can get the online codes for digital copies) he was shifting to buying new movies (on sale) and selling them. Just keeping electronic copies. (Whatever hard copy version he has been buying come with an online code to redeem a digital copy. Because most people don't utilize, he sometimes can score the code with a used movie purchase).

This is AWESOME! From a minimalist standpoint. Less storage, less space, less clutter.

He told me is cheaper anyway. Not really true considering he seems to have infinite credit to buy used movies (without spending cash). But since he's got his (practically unlimited) theater viewing down to almost no-cost, I think he feels more comfortable splurging a bit on his movie collection.

Anyway, I think he picked up 3 movies the other day (reported prior weekend in blog), and another 3 movies yesterday with birthday money (Amazon had some sale or discount). I am just throwing into the allowance category because I have no better place to put that. We don't keep strict track of that. Well, I do track it, but that's about it. I don't do anything else with it. Neither of us are big spenders.

They failed at the crazy big board game from the library, so MM and MH attempted it again yesterday (I don't think they finished). MM was back at school; DL goes back to school Wednesday.

Edited to add: I totally forgot about gymnastics on Monday. That cash spending really slips through the cracks.

I was just starting to wake MM up for school when I thought, "Why is everyone still asleep?" Wednesday! I am surprised no one reminded me last night. {I have no idea what day it is. Wednesday is a late start day for both the schools}.

During most of tax season I welcome the chance to relax and have a breather. But I took a breather over the weekend and have way too much to do. I could have planned ahead better. I can find some work to do for the next 30 minutes or whatever I end up with. Or I may just veg it away on the internet.

Today I will fund my 2017 IRA. We save up all year but it makes more sense to see how the year shakes out before deciding how to fund IRAs. I would have funded mine around 12/31, but we were having fence work done and I knew we'd need to write a couple of checks. I just left the money in the checkbook and figured I'd have the cash on payday (easier than moving money around).

I've already paid all the bills for the month (at the end of December), so this is my only payday task.

I still have no idea what MH can contribute (depends on our taxes) so will hold off on his. Will put what we can into his Traditional IRA and the rest to his ROTH IRA. Will probably do our taxes the weekend after next.

Weekend Spending:
$12 Groceries
$100 Dinner (Friday)
($100) Cash Gift
$100 Hotel Fees, Dining Out (Saturday)
($100) Gift
$100 Room service (Saturday)
($100 Credit)
$28 Dining Out (Sunday)
($50 Credit)

Spent less than $0!

In the end, we spent around $20-ish for the entire weekend away from home. Some of the groceries we brought back home, and the Sunday dining out was included dinner after we got home.

I didn't plan it that way, MH is just charmed like that!

{We have since received a $50 credit from the hotel. So I guess we made money?? I edited above to reflect this credit).

We aren't a big fan of the restaurants in Napa (way over-priced and have yet to find anything that lives up to the hype), BUT we did find an excellent restaurant on a prior visit and planned to return. I expected that to really be our only expense this weekend, and so was fine with the high cost. The food was DIVINE! In the end, MH received some birthday cash to cover that.

The timeshare company and/or the resort screwed up the reservation and so we got a small hotel room instead of the suite we reserved (with full kitchen). I had no idea what on earth we'd spend the $100 credit on, that they gave us to compensate for the error. MH is smart, and figured we could order room service. It worked out since we had planned to buy some groceries and just hole up in the room most of the weekend. $100 covered brunch and dinner on Saturday.

We usually pay -$0- when we stay at timeshare properties, but some hotels have incidental fees (usually parking fees in places like San Francisco). We've stayed at this resort a few times before and I recalled they charge taxes directly to us. So we paid $60 for two nights. (Not a bad deal!) We also made sure to use up entire $100 credit and went over a bit, owing $15. Spent $25 on lunch out Saturday. All that added up to $100, but MH happened to receive a $100 birthday check (in the mail) when we got home. That worked out nicely!

{In the end, MIL was beyond peeved and found out that we can get the taxes refunded if she calls every time. They charged us because we aren't timeshare owners. We probably never mentioned to her in the past?? Anyway, she called to complain about everything and we supposedly have another $50 credit coming to us. Did I mention that MH is charmed?}.

Sunday we ate lunch at our favorite deli chain before heading home, and then I took the kids out to dinner since we had no food in the house (no one was up to running to the store AND cooking). That said, DL started to give me a laundry list of food items. I told him, "If you want me to pick it up for you, you get to order one menu item." I just didn't want some mega order and they had already eaten VERY WELL all weekend. MM(14) ordered a double whopper, which was more than half of the $11 we spent on dinner. We had some food in the house to supplement.

Some Wineries/Landscape:




The view from our hotel:


On Saturday we ended up doing a brewery tour and some beer tasting. We then went to a 2-hour podcast recording. All that was free, except we ordered an appetizer and a beer sampler while waiting for our tour. (Officially they don't do free beer tasting on the weekend, but apparently they do ply you with free beer).

I enjoyed the relaxing weekend. I won't have a full weekend or any weekday off until May. So it was nice to have such a relaxing weekend. MH was telling me that everyone seemed confused that he doesn't go to Napa for the wine. It's only an hour drive from our house, so probably the closest vacation destination we have. Tahoe is nice, but could be treacherous to get to this time of year. & it's twice as far away. Napa is where we go when we want to relax. It's just close and relaxing.

----------------------------------------------------

I was not going for "uber frugal" this month at all, and would roll my eyes at the idea of our lifestyle being uber frugal. (I've lived many adult years on pennies, and we live rather extravagantly these days, compared to any frame of reference I have living in Bay Area or how I grew up).

So I am amused how the month is shaping up. MH and I have a $50 gift card for a fancy meal this week (will go on his birthday). The weekend after that we will probably take my dad to Benihana (belated birthday gift; I have a $100 gift card).

I think I will be able to redeem my last $500 credit card rewards (gift cards) this week. No idea what to even do with that! I will probably donate some.

Was shocked to get a raise this year. Just seemed unlikely given economics of employer. (Was a bit of a niche market that just happened to fared very well during the recession, but now we have an aging/retiring client base). There is still a weird dynamic where I am youngest in office but have surpassed some of my elders, and so have been the only one to get raises over many years. Ever since I realized this, I've not taken raises for granted. I was legitimately shocked this year.

Well, that's easy! I can take care of everything I wanted to in 2018 budget/spending plan without worrying about it.

--Health insurance went up $65/month
(Where the vast majority of my raises have gone since having kids. This year was a small increase in the grand scheme of things.)

--MM wanted to attend third weekly gymnastics class offered this year. We told him we have better things to do than to drive him over there 3 times a week (yikes!) But, that we could discuss after my work review. I am more open to it now; will have some extra funds. Will still have to find some reasonable balance.

--I wanted to bump up our short-term savings. Expenses like insurance (life, disability) are creeping up. Most especially since I turned 40. (Maybe some "leaping up" in that case). This gives us more breathing room in the budget because we use short-term savings for one-off expenses. It's a hard balancing act because if we save money we want to leave it there, and I think psychologically it might work well being a little tight. But it's starting to get a little out of balance and is stressful at the end of the year when I really haven't saved enough for all this stuff.

This breaks out to:
$5,500 property taxes
$4,300 insurance (various)
$2,000 vacation
$1,500 car maintenance
$1,200 Dental
$2,300 Misc.

The extra $1,200 to Misc. = some breathing room. Phew!

When I plugged my new salary into a paycheck calculator I came up with +$280 monthly income with a $250 monthly raise. I presumed that was because of the new tax tables. Anyway, I will do some tax projections today and figure out what to do. I barely withhold any taxes from my monthly paycheck, because I get a OT check every year that's taxed like a bonus. So while it would probably be wise to adjust my withholding with the extra windfall, I also don't see the point of letting the government hold my money all year. It may be that I just decide to put the entire difference ($80/month?) into investments. That is money I can put into tax withholding if my job situation changes.

But I will do a tax projection, make sure I am paying in enough state tax, etc. Once I figure out how much I need for taxes, I can finalize my 2018 goals.

I may just leave sidebar goals as is because they are very aggressive. Not really entirely sure I can or even want to make these goals, but aiming high seems to work well for us.

Maybe I am weird, but the more money we make the harder I find it to save 20% or 30% for long-term. I think that's probably because of taxes. But is probably also the longer we have gone without any BIG expenses. When I am not replacing cars, paying for braces (x2), funding teen drivers, and doing maintenance on a 20-year-old home, it's much easier to lock up 30% of income in retirement and other long-term funds.

Tax Notes:

--Our taxes will remain unchanged with the new tax laws. Our "taxable income" will increase substantially because we lose all of our exemptions. Which probably doesn't bode well for the long run. (For the short run, like just a couple of years, this increase is offset by child tax credits)

--That said, MH's small income is getting taxed at 15% instead of 30%. If we are shifting to a two full-time income, then the timing works out pretty well. As long as we have kids, I still pay "almost nothing" as to taxes on my income. Which is why the high tax rate on an additional few thousand dollars has been so jarring.

--Accordingly, we will probably drop the 401k contributions. We've only done for tax reasons, which annoys me, because increasing cash flow would be the motivation for this job. Will build up taxable investments instead of adding to 401k, which just makes more sense given our financial situation.

It depends how my tax projections go today. Not 100% decided, but I like that I feel less tied to the 401k.

--Will stick with the Traditional IRAs (as much as we can; MH is being phased out). Taxes are complex, and we need the Traditional IRAs to increase our itemized deductions and to lower our taxes. I believe last I calculated was a 24% savings for every dollar we put in Traditional IRA, because it increases our itemized deductions the more we can decrease AGI. So that is why. I will check today now that I have some better salary estimates to plug in. Oh, and we have to do the Traditional IRAs to keep our taxable investments tax-free. Between those two points, I don't see any ROTH contributions in our near future.

Edited to add: It was probably a bigger second income which was much more palate-able with the new tax law. Which is just interesting timing for us. I can't re-create that 15% tax rate with current income situation, so I am guessing that was a more long-term/higher income tax projection.

I ran numbers today and we save 32% for every dollar we put into 401k+Traditional IRA. Looks like we will stick with the 401k. (It's the loss of 0% investment tax rate that is tripping me up).

Federal tax withholding is surprisingly better than I remembered (withholding enough from salary to cover all taxes for year, even with lower withholding rates). But I have to send +$40/month to the state, a 50% increase. This leaves $40-ish per month for investments. I will just round up to $50.

I am copying and pasting sidebar, to memorialize in my blog. Brief Commentary below.

2017 Goals

[X]$11,000 to IRAs 2017 (MAX)
...($11,000 @ 12/31/17)
...We save $900/month

[ ]$5,000 to savings
...($4,013 @ 12/31/17)
...We save $300/month, plus interest.
...Topping off with snowballs

[ ]$8,000 to investments
...($7,236 @ 12/31/17)
...$2,200 from monthly contributions; $2,636 snowflakes/snowballs; $2,400 tax savings
...We save $200/month, plus snowflakes
...Will also invest tax savings ($2,400) when contribute to Traditional IRAs
...Will top off goal with snowballs

[X]$3,000 to mortgage
...($3,225 @12/31/17)
...$3k per year to pay off in 20 years (from last refi); also ensures that we pay more principal than interest
...Funded with overtime

In addition, we save 100% of MH's income.

My goal has been to save 100% of MH's (take-home) pay. I think that's been a little hit and miss. But probably complicated by paying all of the income taxes out of my check (though we pay 6x as much tax on his income; my salary is almost tax-free and is why there is such a substantial difference). I know we have also been using to justify some splurges. Which I am totally cool and fine with. Just don't want second income to be going towards basics like housing and groceries, insurance, etc. Don't want to get used to it. We have always used the second income for more one-off expenses and larger purchases (while primarily invested).

I will have to re-evaluate with tax law changes and all that. I'll update my sidebar when I figure it out.

As to the rest, I fell about $1,500 short of savings goals. Considering we spent about $2,000 on random last minute London trip (over and above vacation budget), I think that pretty much sums that up. Considering we easily paid $1,500 less to go in 2017 (versus any other recent years) and we can now cross that off our list, it probably all evens out in the end. Which is why we take advantage of opportunities like this.

At the end of the day, I always find it hard to sweat these things when our assets are up substantially. I am happy with how 2017 turned out.

January 12
$3 Donut shop
$19 Groceries
$28 gas for car
Dinner: Out of Town (separate post)

If MH told me anything about groceries, I don't remember. Too many days ago!

Used 25-cent gas coupon at gas station.

I ended up going to donut shop on Friday morning. Hadn't really thought of it, but really wanted a soda. Was thinking logically I should just go to CVS (right by MM's school). For reference, I have been driving him to this school for 5 months and have never made a stop like that. Is not a frequent thing for me. But I do sometimes stop for donuts. I decided to just grab a soda at the donut shop. Sure, a donut sounds good too. In the end, all they had was 12 oz soda cans, so not really what I wanted. But it worked in a pinch.

Buying (bakery) donuts is something no one in our house did the 13-ish years that MH was home. Is definitely a "more household income" kind of treat.

January 11
$16 Networking
Dinner: crockpot chili

MH went to a fundraiser for a (new to him) independent film group he is trying to get involved with. My first impression would be he hasn't jived with them in the way he has with other film crews. BUT, to be fair, they haven't done any filming yet! I think working together probably creates some bonding. (I think they are going to film this summer; probably bigger budget than anything MH has worked on before).

Any other week we probably would have gone out and enjoyed, together. It sounded really fun actually. Was a late night out with various forms of entertainment. But as is, I usually go out -0- nights and I already had two other commitments this week. AND I had to ready the house for in-laws (because I had no time otherwise).

Since MH didn't expect to know anyone and doesn't do loud (he can't follow conversations in loud environments because of his hearing loss), he really expected to show up buy a ticket, and come home. He just wanted to show his support. By 9pm or so he wasn't home; we went to bed. In the end, he ran into someone he knew (outside of this group) and he enjoyed himself and stayed for a few hours. I am glad, because I was really thinking he shouldn't bother. He was generally exhausted and dreading the whole thing when he left the house.

I'd probably have no idea how much he spent, because he paid cash. But, he told me this morning he spent $16 on admission and a beer.

Work was slow this week and I just soaked it in. I evaluated my OT and decided I don't even need to cram in many hours this tax season (because worked so many OT hours already, that will be paid out in April). For the long run, not entirely sure how it will shake out and will aim for more hours so I don't fall behind on workload. BUT, decided to not work more than 40 hours this week. (Which means I only had to work until noon today). We have our Napa weekend away, starting tonight.

Most of my angst/busy-ness this week is put on myself for trying to give MH this weekend away. I look forward to RELAXING the next two days.

Weekend plans: One expensive dinner out and two different "free" events. (We aren't wine drinkers; we go to Napa for the scenery and peace).

The PTA meeting we went to this week was for DL's school. Because his school is an art/academic focus, he's required to take 8 classes every semester (in order to squeeze in the crapload of electives). In contrast, MM(14) only takes 6 classes. So DL will graduate with a few extra credits. I don't see any reason why he'd supplement his high school education at all.

That said, they were mentioning AP classes and community college and so on. & apparently community college courses are free to high school students. I don't know the details, but wanted to take note.

That said, it costs pennies regardless, so I already considered it "free". But it's apparently really and truly FREE. (Off the top of my head, I think a regular college course would be $100, for reference).

I am taking note for my other child. I wouldn't be surprised if he graduated early. There is family precedent there. Right or wrong (I don't know) we've really leaned on him to just slow down. But he has such a light courseload (for him) that I can totally foresee him getting through several college classes before he graduates high school. It's more the norm these days anyway. In his case will just be more self motivated.

January 10
$4 Taco Bell Lunch
Dinner: leftovers

My go-to lunch in a pinch is generally in the $2 range, ordering off the dollar menus. (Is what I would order regardless).

Soda/treats are fine, but generally relegated to the grocery store (where the cost is significantly less). In this case, I ran out of soda (more bad planning) and so I just got some soda when I ran out for lunch. I did remember to ask for no ice. The hard part is remembering. The worst is paying $2 for a bucket of ice and a wee bit of a soda. I also only generally order soda from Taco Bell because their small sizes are actually small. In this case, I chose Taco Bell because it's the only place I know to get any decent food near my work. Most everywhere else has shut down (or should). I am sure there are hundreds of eateries, but the very few I frequent are all terrible and have generally gone out of business. I just use this as extra motivation not to eat out.

MH and I did a late night out last night. I remember doing this once before without a babysitter (probably even later at night) and DL(12) was kind of sad about it. It must have been more than 18 months ago, because I can't imagine doing that once he had his depression/anxiety issues last school year. Anyway, we told the kids we'd be home by 10:30 probably, and that they'd have to put themselves to bed. I think MM was very *shrugs* about this last time, and he is a "falls asleep when his head hits the pillow" type, so he was snoring by the time we got home at 10pm. DL was reading in bed, but was very *shrugs* about the whole thing. I suppose we are getting to a space where we can more seriously go out on a school night and whoop it up. Woohoo! For us, would be very rare. I am not a night owl at all.

We went to a special movie screening. We had planned to pay full price. The movie pass was not supposed to apply to this showing, but in the end they took it! I then thought we were going to pay $12.50 (for my ticket). I hadn't realized MH used up the movie gift card (for my ticket). So less spending than I thought. They were advertising all the classic movie special events they do and so on. I told MH, "We should go to some of those, if your ticket is free." He agreed.

January 9
$24 Groceries
Dinner: Saag Paneer (Indian cheese & spinach)

We had a school PTA meeting. So I didn't have any down time at all.

MH went to the grocery store; $10 of that was at the Indian grocer.

MH did tell me that he got on the guest list for one of the podcasts that he watches. We haven't 100% decided if we will go, but will be in the area this weekend. We went once before and it was entertaining. He mentioned how he was thinking it would be free entertainment (and he wanted to go regardless). I think it's just a perfect example of how there are many very interesting and fun things to do that don't necessarily cost money. (Or at the least, don't cost much).

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Today I am suffering from bad planning.

The kids always start school late on Wednesday, BUT they had the last couple of weeks off AND they didn't start late the Wednesday before that.

So... Today I was felling "meh" with all the food on hand and thinking I'd just come home for lunch. Decided I'd just pick up DL at lunch time, and give MH a break from the constant back and forth to/from schools. Then I could take more time to scrounge up some lunch at home.

My kids are very responsible and I don't generally have to wake them up. But everyone was asleep around 7am so I woke the kids up. After I awoke DL I realized it's about 15 minutes early for him. (I so rarely wake him up I don't remember, but sometimes he flips out if he is awoken early). He was in a chill mood, so, PHEW! I woke up MM and he tells me, "It's Wednesday." Ah yes, it is!

I'm already in "go to work" mode though, so I wake up MH and ask him if he will take the kids to school. He is fine with it. But I said I'd pick up DL at lunch, in exchange. He said, "At 2:30?!" Okay, no I will not do that! Back to the drawing board. (I'd be handling all this if MH was working this week, but since he's home I hadn't even bothered to look at the schedule).

I remembered I was in the middle of some tedious project at work that I could just work on from home. Kind of perfect, really. I told him "Plan B: I will take MM to school (like always) but I will pick up DL tomorrow at lunch." I then got an hour of work in and all was well.

I just felt dumb when I was driving to work, because this week was so rushed in general and I had no time to finish the chores I wanted to do. So I had a "DOH" moment that I really should have used the morning time to tend to chores. I was just thrown so completely offguard by the whole thing. So that is how I made my life more complicated than it has to be.

We will all get back into our groove next week.

January 8
$10 Gymnastics
Dinner: Falafels

MH used his movie pass today. He's not used very much because he just hasn't had time. The movie was free. I asked him if he had any free screenings to go to. He said there was one this week, but we have plans every night pretty much. He usually goes to the advanced screenings a couple of times a week. So I wouldn't be surprised if he just started going to regular movies 2-3 weeks instead. But the advanced screenings are fun, and by far the better deal if the kids and I ever want to go too.

Work was so quiet and calm. It has been constantly crazed for the past month or so. I am used to more quiet days than crazy days, in general.

I got confirmation that insurance issue is squared away with mortgage holder. Phew! That was just the icing on the cake and it feels like a load had been lifted off my shoulders (between that and work settling down a bit). Don't get me wrong, it's a horrible deadline month and these new W2/1099 deadlines are entirely impossible. But I just feel like I can slow down and breathe this week. Panic can resume next week.

When I came home, MH was in a similar mood. He was thrilled he had time to go to the movies!

P.S. I've noticed in the past that MH's menu planning seemed to be more themed. Chicken one week. Lots of beef another week. Then a vegetarian week. I think it's subconscious. Anyway, I didn't notice that so much this time until now. Last 3 meals were non-meat?? (I made the sloppy joes, last minute, so was not part of the meal plan at all).