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Gearing Up for Some Crazy

January 14th, 2010 at 08:35 am

I've heard and seen some interesting opinions and attitudes over the years - when it comes to a male stay-at-home-parent.

I can conclude from many a conversation that most people think men are incapable of housework, cooking, and child rearing. EVEN if it has been their full-time job for many years. (I have had women snidely tell me that they would NEVER leave their kids in the care of their husband. Um, and this is something to brag about? Good for you - you married a moron? Or that you are that much of a control freak?)

I have gathered that most people I know think that I am happy to fill in the role of "do it all mom," while my husband sits at home and does nothing. I mean, he may pick up the kids from school, and care for them while I am at work. But obviously I do everything else. (& it's a miracle the house hasn't burned down, and the kids haven't starved, in the meantime!)

???

So, anyway. It will be interesting to fill in the role of "do it all mom." Not looking forward to it in the least. But I suppose I will fill the role that everyone expects I already have. Or which most moms I know already fill. Which means - I suppose I will get little sympathy. Wink

But honestly, I am just EXHAUSTED thinking about it. Beyond the chauffering, cooking, cleaning, errands, staying home with sick kid days, etc., etc. it is so much more than that. There is the discipline and the refereeing, and the "eat your dinner if you want dessert" and all that stuff that dh usually takes on. He has always taken that on, because he is way better at all that stuff than I.

For our kids' sake, I hope dh's recovery is speedy. Big Grin

His surgery is in just one week!

6 Responses to “Gearing Up for Some Crazy”

  1. frugaltexan75 Says:

    Have you considered having someone come in and clean once a week until your DH recovers? The cost may be worth it so you're not so exhausted - one less thing to worry about.

  2. JanH Says:

    My thoughts are with you all during the surgery and recovery! DS stayed at home for a year taking care of his little one while he finished school stuff. He did an amazing job raising her. Funny, years ago when I decided to stay home with my kids I was the one that got all the flack from people because I was "wasting my brains." Sheesh. What's up with these ideas?

  3. monkeymama Says:

    FT - Actually the one thing dh doesn't do is clean, and I don't like other people in my house. So, will do without. BUT - I wouldn't think twice about hiring any help we need/want during this time. I just don't care that much about a messy house - used to it this time of year...

    Jan - It's even more fun with the SAHD/working mom thing. My dh "Wastes his brains," while I am a terrible person who never spends time with her kids. Wink Basically - you can't win, so who cares what everyone else thinks? I remember being extremely perplexed by the mommy wars when I had my first child. I just never quite *got* it. So if you work, you are a workaholic who never spends time with their kids? If you stay home you are wasting your time? Oy vey! We live in the shades of grey called REALITY.

  4. CB in the City Says:

    There are a lot of stupid people with a lot of stupid opinions, and they don't mind sharing them! Ignore, ignore.

    Wishing your hubby the very best....

  5. Ima saver Says:

    Well my husband has done all the cleaning and most of the cooking since we have been married. He is much better at it than I am and seems to enjoy most of it.

  6. Caoineag Says:

    DH is the only one who does the day to day cleaning and laundry in my household so the whole men can't do anything domestic attitude never did sit well with me. Hopefully you won't have to play everything mom for too long.

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