Home > Found moolah & Who really cares about the Joneses anyway?

Found moolah & Who really cares about the Joneses anyway?

May 29th, 2007 at 02:20 pm

OMG - what the heck did I get myself into? I had a few boxes in the bedroom, and well I was hell bent on cleaning out the room. But as I Was posted I didn't want to do too much work - LOL. I didn't realize these boxes were from my office and the kitchen too, etc., etc., etc.

So I probably spent a good 3 hours, heavy lifting and all that too. I told dh afterwards it was good, because it felt good to get through it all, and I wouldn't have done it otherwise - LOL.

In the process I found a jar of about $10.50 change. Score! I told dh that would get my 8 or 9 $1 meals - just make it my cash for the month. Luckily only about $1.50 of it was pennies. Mostly quarters and dimes. I find it funny because I am not into the whole change thing, mostly as I don't carry cash for the most part. So yeah I could start carrying around a bunch of cash and saving huge chunks, but then I'd have to pull it out of my savings, so it goes. I pay myself first and cash is like if I have any leftover I Can splurge a little, just the way I work. So I find it quite ironic that I have a jar full of change.

I also considered giving it to the kids, filling up their little piggy banks as a start. I could do that too. But mostly I invest their money rather than hold onto cash for them too - same thing. But I thought when will I ever come across a pile of change again? So maybe.

Anyway, I had a big bag of trash and a big bag for ebay. I am rethinking this though. The whole reason I wanted to sell ebay was for items I thought I could get real money for. I am getting real with myself, I don't have time to sell a lot of little things, and I am better off maximixing my time at work. I think I have lost sight of that a bit, and will probably shift most of it to the freecycle/donation pile. Either way it will be good to get rid of more junk.

Dh did say he would try to sell his projector again. 2 years ago when he bought the new one part of the reason he convinced me was because he could sell the old one for $800 or something. I don't know. But he never did, then he decided to keep it. HE did try to sell it once or twice, but it was a bit high. He told me he would probably list it for $500 this week and give it a try again. Woohoo!

Well, we'll see.

In other news I just have one pearl of financial wisdom. If you saw the SA blog it had a nice little post about "what you're not." You're not your house, your car, your material things. & then today I saw the post about the Joneses. & I thought to me what is so simple is hard for many. I wasn't raised to care about the Joneses, to define myself by material things.

I noticed this last weekend when I Was hanging out with my parents and in-laws. In true MIL fashion, she actually said to my parent's face that they have always had it easier than her. I just wanted to hide at that point but my parents actually took it pretty well. For one they are both pretty on par financially, they just choose to spend their money very differently, but overall dh and I Were raised pretty on par and have the same financial views, and I know their income is about the same, etc., I do everyone's taxes. But even more to the point MIL has not a clue how poor my dad was as a kid. He did not have it easier than about anyone I know, so whenever anyone starts on that you just want to smack them, honestly. What the hell does she know being brought up in middle class bliss?

But I digress. MIL I have noticed since day 1 always compares herself to others. & she is miserable for it. She has a very charmed middle class life, but she is too busy worrying how everyone else may be doing better to actually sit back and enjoy. She had the gall to tell me multiple times last year that they are "so poor." HAving come from a truly poor family, comments like that don't sit well, she hasn't a clue what it's like to be truly poor. Not that I really do either, but she can complain about her little home all she wants where I have spent many a summer visiting my dad's family who live in shacks without most of the amenities she has. So it gets really old. The whole thing just annoys me. Blah blah blah, yes you are so bad off, then why the hell did you take 6 adults and 3 babies to HAwaii last year? You seemed to have the money for that. Yeah - that's POOR. (Not).

ANyway, the whole reason I share all this is I had an epithany. My dad could have easily in that situation said, "I had it worse." But the thing is who cares who had it worse, does it really matter? Instead my dad kind of turned it around and pointed out all that they had, as opposed to how bad off MIL thinks she is. & as I Sat there thinking about how what a truly wonderfully happy person my dad is and how miserable MIL seems to be I realized plain as day the only true difference is their attitude. I realized I have NEVER heard my dad complain about how anyone had it easier than him. & he never will. Life is too short for that. & the people who are ALWAYS comparing themselves to others will always be miserable. IT's not productive and it doesn't accomplish anything.

I guess I realize I have received a truly sublime gift from my parents who never measured themselves in terms of their material wealth, and never compared themselves to others. I find with time that these are probably the biggest challenges for most of my friends, even other family, but to me comes easy. OF course I am not these things, of course I Could care less what the Joneses' are doing.

But I just throw that out there because truly if you worry about everyone else a little less and yourself a little more, you will really be amazed at the difference in your life. Plus I guess complaining is just about one of my biggest pet peeves ever. Complain a little less and do a little more - certainly got that one from my dad. IT truly makes ALL the difference in life.

4 Responses to “Found moolah & Who really cares about the Joneses anyway?”

  1. homebody Says:

    Sometimes your posts are just .....deep... I can't find the right word.

    Enjoyed it, identify with it... keep it up.

  2. shadon Says:

    I'm not one for change jar saving either. Our change jar is mostly made up of 5, 10, 20 & 50c pieces (1 & 2 cent pieces were abolished here years ago) that DH leaves laying around on the kitchen bench cos the zipper on the change compartment of his wallet is broken. I throw that in an old baby formula tin and just scape together a couple of dollars when I'm out of bread or milk before grocery day.

    On the subject of your MIL and parents. My mum had the exact same argument with her brother several years ago. He said that mum and dad were "lucky" to have what they do. Naturally my parents took offense considering they had both worked very hard since the age of 15 to drag themselves up out of poverty to the point where they have no debt and income and assets worth close to $2mil. Her brother had better opportunities than mum and dad as he worked for his father as a wall/floor tiler earning top money but has blown the majority of his money gambling (horses). Her other brother is exactly the same but his problem is poker machines. (sigh) Some people really need to take a good hard look at themselves, don't they.

  3. boomeyers Says:

    I have a friend who is always comparing (and therefore always miserable). Nothing you can do about these people. It is even a waste of time to feel sorry for them.

  4. LuckyRobin Says:

    My grandfather grew up in heart-breaking poverty. My father grew up in normal(?) level poverty. I grew up in a working class family that made its way up to middle class by the time I was in middle school. My husband makes a very good wage and we have all we need, but according to the government, we are not even lower middle class, though I feel like we are middle middle class. We live in an area that has a high rate of low incomes and some poverty level incomes. Very few of the people out here complain. Ever. I consider myself extremely fortunate. When some of my townie friends gripe about being poor, and how lucky I am to own a house and don't have to work, I just smile and nod. Of course, living on one income is a lifestyle choice and living in the rural area with less expensive housing is also a lifestyle choice. Pretty much you have to leave the citified areas of our county to do it. But they don't want to make those choices. They think it is sacrificing too much. I think it is sacrificing too much to not live like I do.

Leave a Reply

(Note: If you were logged in, we could automatically fill in these fields for you.)
Will not be published.

* Please spell out the number 4.  [ Why? ]

vB Code: You can use these tags: [b] [i] [u] [url] [email]