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Archive for October, 2008

To the Moms - Slow Down...

October 2nd, 2008 at 01:56 pm

I watched Oprah last night, and sort of regretted it.

It was about a mom who had left her daughter in the car all day, in the summer, and who of course didn't make it.

My heart SUNK when I watched it. It was really hard to watch.

This happened to a friend of a friend, in 2006 I believe. Before that time I don't know if I would have thought much but, "How on earth could you do that?????"

But at the time this happened to the friend of the friend, it was VERY unsettling. I had a 9-month-old and was completely sleep deprived. We had just started taking BM to preschool. IT was a completely new routine and there were days I forgot he was even in the car. I remember for weeks and months after this tragedy thinking, "He was so quiet. I am glad I was awake enough to remember to take him to school."

When I heard this happened, it was unsettling because I knew the exact same thing could happen to me, quite easily.

For me, it was the sleep deprivation more than anything. & these days, though I am more well rested, I am grateful LM is very loud in the car. He talks non-stop. He wouldn't be forgotten. Phew!

Anyway, the interesting thing on Oprah was the woman did come on the show to get the message out - that this can happen to you.

But not in the way expected.

The sleep deprivation was mentioned off-hand towards the end of the show.

What they were really focusing was just on women who did too much. Their brains were too full of to-do lists, they had taken so much on, and they felt such a strong need to be perfect, that they were putting their children at risk.

The show became more about how overwhelmed women (moms)as a whole are feeling.

So really the message of the show was slow down and ask for help.

& I have blogged quite a few times about that, in a sense. You don't have to be super woman and you don't have to do everything. I have blogged many times how I know a LOT of women returning to work this year. Most of them are doing too much. For various reasons their husbands aren't helping. (Some don't have husbands, some of them work out of town most of the time, some of the husbands are just a$$e$). But a lot of them have been coming to me on advice how to juggle it all. Because I am the experienced WORKING mom, and I seem to have it together, I guess.

Honey, the reason I seem to have it together is because I don't do half the stuff that you do!!!!!! I mean, that's what I have to say most of the time. It's kind of like, "Hello. Do you remember my husband? The one who stays home? Do you think I let him play video games all day and I run the entire household?" I honestly have to figure that's what they think. YEah, sure, since when do men help with the domestics?

I guess it gets under my skin. That I have a full-time-at-home spouse, and women still ask me how I have to make dinner, bathe the children, blahdeblahdeblah after work is over. How do I manage doctor appointments?, and on and on and on...

Are they serious?

So in the past I have kind of said to the young women, you know, you don't have to give up yourself to have children. Demand the help you respect and reserve. & just don't take on too much.

But I had to share. I think this is an important message. Disasters happen when you try to do too much. So slow down and take care of yourself and your children.

& give them extra hugs today. Life is short.

September Preview

October 1st, 2008 at 02:50 pm

I'll show my expenses over the weekend - the credit card closes Friday.

As of today, I am up to $4890 expenses for September, which is quite reasonable. I like to think our expenses average $4000/month (regular and monthly). & the figure above includes $400 in dental expenses and $400 auto insurance and repairs.

Gas and Groceries were right on - $800. Though I am not sure if dh has to go to the grocery store the next 3 days. Probably, it seems it had been a while. So we may go over. I will encourage him to just get what we need. We certainly have enough food to last through Friday.

So everything was right on, or under budget.

Except one area we completely blew out of the water.

Dining out - $225.



I almost fell over when I saw that one. I guess it adds up fast.


I also just added all my interest for the month, to my savings spreadsheet.

& I remembered I will get $250 from the credit card (rewards) next week.

So my mid-term savings will hit $3k next week. Woohoo!

It will be short-lived. Too many expenses coming up.

I also was finally able to get my short-term savings back in the black. Yeesh.

I updated my totals on the left.

(Almost $5k in cash over efund? Eh, easy come, easy go... IT will be gone on a flash - most of the money is earmarked for large expenses).

Oh well, more on all of this later...


Almost forgot, my CD matures next week and my 0% balance transfer is due this month. So this was my last month of $90 interest. That figure will drop to $40 interest, next month. *sigh* It was fun while it lasted though!

To help make up for it I am now saving $200/month. The interest was really nice when times were tighter. Easy money. But now I can pick up the slack (& improve on it).

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