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The World Doesn't End When You Say No

September 6th, 2011 at 08:25 pm

I am extremely proud of one of my good friends with the financial progress she has made the past few years.

& yet, there are times I still notice substantially different financial philosophies between the two of us.

Anyway, we got cornered at the Gold Rush Days, by a balloon animal artist. I immediately said "no," to the kids. We had intended to spend no money, and I had already let them get ice cream with their friends. (Plus, it's not like they haven't gotten a TON of ballon animals over the years. Maybe none this year, but I think they will survive).

Of course my friend's response was, "I couldn't possibly say no!" But she was grumbling about it, all the same. Like how she was forced into this situation and just couldn't say no.

& this is where I see that dh and I substantially differ from other people.

We can so NO to things.

& I really don't understand why people have such a hard time saying no to things. Whether it be a timeshare, high pressure sales, or balloon animals.

So, anyway, that was just my recent, "I couldn't say no!" experience.

Of course, made it harder for us to say no, but we could still do it. & if you asked the kids today, they probably don't even remember the incident. It certainly didn't come up again, after the point it was obvious that we meant no.

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I've often struggled with how SPOILED the kids are by grandparents and just being in a much better financial standing than we grew up in.

It's experiences like these that remind me that they are not spoiled. Maybe they are on some levels. But, on other levels, they know the answer is just, "No."

I am still adjusting to the fact that my more well off friends are better at saying no. The broke ones never are. It makes sense of course, but still throws me off guard at times.

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Anyway, yes, we decided to go to the Gold Rush Days afterwards because the kids really wanted to go. Dh and I were kind of, "eh," but it wasn't too hot in the end, and we didn't know they would be so bummed to miss it.

For the best, since we had made loose plans to meet some friends. So, we didn't ditch everyone we invited. LOL.

Yesterday was kind of run run run, because we were there for about 5 hours, and I had also promised the kids a trip to the pool. I honored the promise since it might be the last day the pool is open. (Who knows though - hot week - so we might get a few more days!). There were a number of neighborhood kids there, so they had a blast. I just lounged and read, so I got some veg time in.

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Our 11-year anniversary is coming up in a couple of weeks. We have a weekend getaway to Napa - that we are redeeming in late October, simply because we booked too late to get anything sooner.

MIL was trying to get us to drive down so she could have the kids (I think, selfishly). But, I was feeling pretty "eh" about the whole thing. I didn't feel we needed to do anything spectacular on the date, and kind of wanted to save some money to enjoy Napa, anyway.

So, I talked to dh about it. I told him my feelings, but that I of course respected if he wanted to do something more elaborate. He said, "Don't we have an Olive Garden coupon? I'd be happy to just take the kids with us." Sounds PERFECT to me! I suppose whatever we decide, it will be the four of us. (I think part of the thing is it just isn't hard to get alone time, with the kids in school. In fact, we have a lunch date at home, today. & we were meeting for lunch later in the week. So, not feeling the night out alone need. If money was no object we might do it, but I rather save up for some really nice meals in wine country).

3 Responses to “The World Doesn't End When You Say No”

  1. FrugalTexan75 Says:
    1315359372

    You know ... my brother works at several 4 and 5 star restaurants in Napa ... and he just started an internship on the Napa Wine train. If you want me to, I could possibly check with him on the best deals, etc. Maybe you could have him wait on you -- he's a fantastic waiter. Big Grin Although I don't know if you're wanting to spend quite the money for meals at the places he works ... (easy $300 for two before wine, though lunch probably is less ...)

  2. MonkeyMama Says:
    1315414149

    I don't think we are going to any 4 or 5 star restaurants. Big Grin $50 would be a splurge, for us. But, yeah, let us know what deals are around or what he might recommend on a budget? Thanks!!

  3. FrugalTexan75 Says:
    1315439794

    Yeah, that's kind of what I figured. Smile I just texted him to see what he says. Big Grin

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